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Chapter 42

“Uh, you can not be going out like that!”

“I am. I have a date.”

“With who?”

“None of your business Nick. Besides, don’t you have some blonde bimbo to keep happy?”

“You’re referring to Terri.” I raised an eyebrow at him before heading towards the elevator.

“Last time I checked, she was your girlfriend, you know.” He sighed, pushing the button. “Nick…”

“I don’t want to discuss it.” I shrugged before stepping into the elevator, him quickly following. “Did you realize she’s pushy?” I glanced at him, shaking my head before laughing. “What?”

“I thought you didn’t want to discuss it?”

“I didn’t. I don’t.”

“So, why are you bringing it up?”

“You’re an easy person to talk to.”

“Nick, don’t talk about your girlfriend with your ex-wife. No matter the problems, or the cost. Especially, if that ex wife is me, ‘cause I really don’t wanna hear it.”

“You sounded like you did.”

“No, I’m concerned that your down, and you’re gonna bring down my night. I don’t want that. Suck it up, man.” I smiled, stepping off the elevator and making my way over to the group, all heads craning to see.
“Where in the world did you get that?” I smiled at Brian, slipping my arm in his other arm, smiling at LeighAnne.

“Some near and dear friends. Why, don’t like it?”

“No, just surprised Nick didn’t jump you in the elevator.”

“He would have been pushed off if he tried.” Brian stopped, yanking my arm back. “What was that for?”

“LeighAnne, go ahead and get in the limo, I need to talk to Resa for a moment.” LeighAnne smiled, kissed Bri’s cheek, than climbed in, leaving Brian and I alone.

“What’s up Brian?”

“Why don’t you tell me? Push Nick off of you. Thought you wanted him?”

“Wanted him. Let’s just say that asshole exterior runs a little deeper than I thought. If that’s how he’s gonna be, trying to get everything at once, than I just don’t want that.”

“I’m more than confused. What the hell happened?”

“Nothing that I can explain in the course of a few moments. Let’s go, Bri.”

“Wait, hold on here. Did he do something to do you?” I rolled my eyes before moving towards the limo. “Theresa, damn it, I’m serious.”

“Everyone is aware how spoiled Nick can be. He just wants his cake and ice cream too and I’m not willing to give him that. I’m tired of giving him that. Thought I could change his mind, thought I became what he wanted. But ya know what,” I glanced down at myself, smiling before glancing back at Brian, “this wasn’t for him, this was for me, and I’m very happy with the way I am.”

“You’re not going after him?”

“I’m not fighting to win his attention anymore.”

“But what if he fought for you?”

“Mr. Carter has a lot of ground to cover. Starting first, with those two precious kids he has. He’s hurt them far more than he’s hurt me.”

-----
I walked over to the table, watching the guys out on the floor.

“You look amazing tonight.” I raised an eyebrow. “You did notice you have had him in shock all night long?”

“I’m sure D. This has nothing to do with him though.” Howie took a sip of his drink.

“It’s not? Then why did you get all dressed up for?”

“Honestly?” He nodded his head. “Because I can. Because I wanted to. Because Mr. Carter has no control over my life, nor will he ever again. I give two shits about that man right now. He’s my babies daddy and nothing more.” I slammed my drink down, Howie lips tugging into a smile.

“Is there something you’re not sharing?”

“Nothing you need to know about it. Let’s just leave it that my eyes are opening up.”

“They should have been opened a while ago. After all, he’s trying to have both of you.” I narrowed my eyes, crossing my arms over my chest.

“You know!”

“That you slept with him? Yes.”

“How?”

“That night he was outside his hotel room, thinking, or scared, I’m not sure which. But anyways, we took a walk, he confided some things.”

“What did you tell him?”

“Oh no, I’m not sharing. May I ask you a question though?”

“By all means. Doesn’t mean I have to answer you know.”

“True. Do you love him?” I sighed, running my fingers through my hair, my eyes scanning over the crowd on the dance floor once more before turning back to Howie.

“I’m getting sick of the question.”

“It’s an honest question. You want nothing to do with him, does that include loving him?”

“I’m confessing this to you, Howie, if I hear about it from anyone else; BSB will be minus a boy. I love Nick, I will always love Nick. He was my first love, my only love, and I forgot how many times I heard him utter that. But there comes a point when love isn’t enough anymore. Nick has treated me in some of the worst ways. Am I to allow that? To be here for him simply because I love him? I tired fighting for him, to make him see and he tossed that in my face. He wants her over me, and that’s fine. Let her use him, abuse him, and toss him aside like every female he’s ever dated. I don’t care! This change, this new me, started out for him, to make him notice me, but you know what, I’m happy with me! I love this me. I can’t go back to the way I used to be. And part of that was allowing Nick to be the ass that he is. He wanted a new wife…well, now he has a new ex-wife. I’m stating again, I’m not fighting for Nick anymore, no matter how much I love him.”