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Before: The List


Nick

When I got up to the hospital room, Ashley was sitting up in the middle of her bed with Zoey on her lap, cooing happily down at her. I put the peppermint patty and Yoohoo down on Ashley's tray table and climbed up on the bed with her and tilted my head to look at Zoey, too. Zoey's fat little lips puckered and spit came out and she rolled her eyes around. Ashley laughed, then looked at me. "Good morning," she said happily.

"Good morning," I replied. I kissed her cheek.

"Guess what?" she said, her eyes only momentarily darting from Zoey's chubby little face to mine.

"Hmm?" I glanced at her, then back at Zoey, too. She looked so much like Ashley it was crazy. It was like having two of them. I looked at Ashley as she looked at Zoey and smiled. I couldn't ask for more in all the world.

"Dr. Jorryn says we can go home," Ashley said. Then, to Zoey, "Yes he did, yes he did, didn't he Zozozo?"

I was simultaneously ecstatic and terrified. "Awesome!" I said, only letting my ecstatic side show through. "It's a good thing I stayed up and got the room ready for Miss Zozo, then." I grinned down at her, "I painted the whole room," I said, "It's all pink like you."

"And you're so pink," Ashley said.

Yeah, I know, we were very repetitive.

Dr. Jorryn came in the room, holding his ipad and adjusting his glasses. He looked up as he came around the curtain. "Well hello there, Nick, here to pick up these two gorgeous women are you?"

"Hey Dr. J," I answered. We bumped fists. Ashley smirked. "I'm allowed to take'em home you mean?"

Dr. Jorryn nodded, "It appears that way," he answered.

I looked at Ashley, "You hear that, honey, I get to take you home." I grinned cheesily at her so all my teeth showed.

Ashley raised an eyebrow.

"Yep, I've already signed off on Ashley here and I'll sign off on Miss. Zoey as soon as we've inspected that your car seat is properly installed."

I hesitated.

"You do have a car seat, yes?" Dr. Jorryn asked, looking over the rim of his glasses at me.

"I.... uh..." I bit my lower lip, "...painted the nursery."

"You forgot the car seat?" Ashley asked from behind me. "I put it on the list..."

"Yeah, the list. About the list..."

"Nick, what'd you do with the list?" Ashley asked, looking worried.

See... Ashley made a list for me. A list of things that needed to be done around the house before she and Zoey could come home. And the list was Very Important. She'd even drawn stars on the top of it with a highlighter to emphasize this fact. The list was so important to me that I'd put it in the little pocket on my jeans - you know, the pocket in the pocket, the extra safe pocket - just so I wouldn't lose it. Thing is, I never use the pocket in a pocket (because I save it for the super important stuff, really), and I forgot there was anything in there.

"Well... I did my laundry the other day..."

Ashley smacked her hand to her forehead. "So you didn't put the outlet covers on?"

"Er..."

"Or buy baby gates for the kitchen and hallway and sliding door?"

"Uhm..."

Dr. Jorryn's eyebrows were raised, a trace of humor playing on the corner of his mouth.

"Tell me you at least put together the crib."

I raised my hand, "That one I did do!" I said triumphantly.

Ashley sighed.

"Tell you what," Dr. Jorryn said. "Officially, Ashley's been discharged already. Why don't you two go home and do the last preparations and come back in a couple hours with the car seat and Zoey will be ready for you when you get back." He smiled.

I hated the idea of leaving Zoey alone at the hospital. I pictured Chris coming in on a rampage, scooping her up Cruella DeVille style, and running off to make dalmation-spot coats with her. Or something like that.

Ashley looked like she was thinking the same thing.

Dr. Jorryn put his ipad down and reached over, scooping Zoey up off Ashley's lap. Ashley's hands only very reluctantly let Zoey slide away. She looked like she was about to cry. Ashley, I mean, not Zoey. Zoey was perfectly happy in Dr. Jorryn's arm, a trail of drool coming out of the left corner of her mouth as she blinked up at him with her thick eyelashes.

"Go home, get ready," Dr. Jorryn said. He scooped his ipad up and tucked it under his arm. "Your lives are about to get turned upside down." He grinned. He nodded at papers he'd left on Ashley's nightstand. "There's Ashley's discharge forms there. We'll see you in a little bit. Say bye-bye, Zoey," he said, tilting her so we could see her.

Ashley's lower lip puckered out and she choked out, "Bye bye Zozozo."

"Bye bye," Dr. Jorryn said, ducking out of the room, carrying Zoey.

Ashley looked at me, pouting, "Aw Nick, I miss her."

I leaned forward and kissed Ashley's forehead.




Ashley

Nick and I were in Babies R Us, pushing the blue buggie around and grabbing all the supplies that had been on the list. I leaned against the buggy, pointing things out for Nick to get off the shelf that we needed. So far we had outlet caps, four extendable gates, bottles, pacifiers, a case of diapers (how the hell did he forget diapers?), a baby monitor with video, a heartbeat teddy bear, enough baby socks to stuff Pamela Anderson's bra on a twelve year old (or Paris Hilton), and a bunch of onesies.

We were now on the car seat aisle and Nick was playing with this interactive display that helped new parents pick out the car seat. "I never knew there was so many different friggin car seats," he muttered.

I ran my hand over my stomach. I felt empty. I pouted. Nick was still busy with the thingy and didn't notice the moment I was having. I looked down the aisle, a mother was pushing her cart with a toddler in it. I pictured Zoey being that size by the time we got back. I was missing her growing up, I just knew it.

"Niiiick," I whined.

"What?" he didn't look up from the monitor he was jabbing at with his finger.

"Nick hurry up, I miss my Zozo."

He pointed at the monitor. "This thing's a bitch, I'm tryin' to hurry."

"We still gotta go home and put all this shit up and stuff."

"We can get her first if you want," he said.

I looked at the toddler down the aisle. He was grabbing at stuff. I pictured Zoey grabbing at stuff. "What if she puts her fingers in the electrical socket?"

"I don't think she's gonna be near any electrical sockets in the time it takes me to get the thingies in them," he said.

"But she might be," I replied. I bit my fingernail nervously.

"She can't even crawl yet, babe," Nick answered.

"But --"

"Graco SmartRider 6000. That's what we need." He looked up and down the aisle, squinted at the screen, then muttered, "Fuck they all look the same."

The mother with the toddler looked afforntedly at Nick then buzzed off down the aisle, clearly offended by his language.

"We need to um curb our vocabulary," I said.

Nick turned to look at me. "What?"

"You and me, we need to start watching what we say so when Zoey gets bigger she isn't saying cuss words."

Nick stared at me for a moment. "Who said a cuss word?" he asked.

"You did, you just said..." I paused. "Fluff," I said finally, "You said fluff."

"Fluff?"

"Yes, fluff." I nodded.

Nick stood there staring at me. Then he walked over to me and he stood real close and his eyes were serious and sultry and he pressed his forehead against mine so our eyes were looking right directly into each other and he put his hands on my back, running them down my spine. His voice was playfully husky, "How about... I get the fluffin' car seat... into the cart... then we take the fluffin' thing out to the car...and put it in the backseat... then go home... and I'll fluff you so hard..."

I felt my knees go weak.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," he said.

"Fluff me, Nick Carter," I said thickly, "Fluff my brains out."

Nick grinned, then turned quickly and grabbed a random car seat. "Let's get the fluff outta here!"