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Chapter Fifteen: I Get That A Lot


When I pulled up to the Fresh Oasis, I was about fifteen minutes early to pick Becky up. Ricky was standing outside, squatting, smoking and texting on his cell phone, leaning against a potted palm tree that stood to the left of the Oasis' door. I parked and got out of my car, hit the lock button. Dwoop, dwoop, the car sang. Ricky looked up, took the cigarette out of his mouth, and stood up. "Hey Mr. Yummy," he said. He had on a pink apron and a yellow gingham button down shirt with a pink tie. He wore pink skinny jeans and a pair of the classic Van sneakers in yellow. Everything on the guy matched. He looked like he could have starred on Queer Eye back in the day.

"Hey," I said. I shoved my keys in my pocket and started for the door.

"Wait," he said, "I need to talk with you."

"What?"

"You're aware how freakishly similar you look to Nick Carter from the Backstreet Boys," he said.

It was a statement more than a question, so I just nodded my consent. "I get that a lot," I said. I figured trying to deny it would seem weirder than just accepting and moving on. I started to walk away again, but he caught my arm.

"I'm, like, a huge fan of them," Ricky said, "Just so you know." He stared at me for a long moment.

I nodded.

He shrugged. "I just wanted you to know," he said. He started toward the door.

I had this sinking, deep feeling he knew.

"Don't tell her," I begged.

He glanced back at me. "If you hurt her -- I swear -- I might be tiny, and I might be weak, but I will so, so, so kick your ass like there ain't no tomorrow, you hear me?" He snapped his fingers. "I got friends that work out, I'm just saying."

"Okay Ricky," I said.

"She doesn't deserve no more pain, she's been through enough," Ricky warned me.

I nodded.

He turned and shoved his way into the Oasis' front doors. I followed at a slight distance, my mind reeling over what he'd just said. Becky smiled and waved from behind the smoothie bar as she untied her apron. She disappeared into the kitchen for a couple moments, then came out, high-fived Ricky, and came over to me, tugging her hair out of the pony tail she'd put it into. "Hey," she said, smiling, "Have a good day?"

"Yeah it was a'ight," I replied.

She breathed in, "You smell funny."

"What?"

"You smell like --" she leaned closer and pressed her face into my chest. "You smell like perfume." She looked up at me, one eyebrow raised.

I laughed, "I went to the mall. You know the guys that squirt random scents on you as you walk by?"

"Really? They sprayed you with girly perfume?"

"It's cologne, believe it or not," I lied.

Becky laughed, leading the way out the door, "Well never buy that kind cos it makes you smell like a woman."

We walked down the sidewalk to the Slyyymer. I kept glancing around for renegade photographers, half expecting a full fledged paparazzi crew to leap out of the bushes at any moment.

"Soooo," Becky sang out, "Do you wanna use the laser tag passes tonight?"

"Nawh." Going back to the boardwalk sounded dangerous to me somehow. Like returning to the scene of the crime after pulling a bank job.

Becky laughed, "Okay. So what do you wanna do then?"

I tried to think of something that we could do without the chance of being spotted. I wanted to fly under the radar. "We could go home and watch movies," I suggested.

"What movies?" Becky asked lighting up.

"I dunno," I replied. "What movies do you wanna watch?"

She thought for a moment. "I haven't watched the Lord of the Rings in awhile," she said. "I don't work tomorrow. Do you work tomorrow?"

I didn't work again until the Boys and I went on tour.

"Nope," I replied.

"See? Serendipity," she said, grinning. "We can pull all nighters and watch Gollum get devoured by the power of Mordor."

I laughed, "Okay. Lord of the Rings it is then."

"And maybe if we stop by my place real fast I can get my lap top and maybe while we're watching the movies we could go on a quest." She grinned.

"Oh?" I raised an eyebrow, "A quest requires being in a clan."

"I know," she replied.

"So you wanna be in a clan with me now?"

She shrugged, "Maybe."

"Decided I'm not so bad after all huh?"

"Eh. You're okay."

"Damn straight I'm okay," I laughed.

Becky rolled her eyes. "Don't go getting full of yourself, sir," she warned, "Or I'll have to slice your gnome's head off."

"Oh baby, my gnome likes it rough."

Becky drove from the Fresh Oasis across town to a squat house on a corner. A Lincoln sat in the car and a sprinkler ran on the lawn, turned onto its lowest setting. She parked on the curb out front. She stared at the door for a moment. "You want to wait here, or..."

Something about her voice told me she wanted me to wait in the car. Which peaked my interest, of course. "I'll come in," I said. "I'd like to see where you're from."

"Okay." She climbed out of the car and I did, too. I followed her up the walkway to the squat house. She paused at the door, her keys in her hand about to slip into the lock. She turned to face me and looked me square in the eyes. "I live with my Dad," she said in a rush, "He's old and he's half blind and half deaf and he's crotchety and he's probably going to say something offensive and embarassing and probably call you Bill because he calls every guy ever Bill." Becky's eyes were wide with anxiety. "And also my brother's probably here somewhere. If he shows up... just... ignore him."

"Okay?"

"He's kinda crazy. Like seriously he's crazy. He gets freaked out by new people in the house."

"Okay..." I was starting to think maybe I should've stayed in the car. "Where's your mom?" I asked.

"She's dead," Becky replied. And before I could even wrap my mind around the words she'd said, much less come up with a response, she'd turned back to the door and opened it up. The first thing I saw was a giant fish tank. And the second thing was a giant dog... as it leaped through the air and knocked me backwards to the ground.