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It had been three days since Kat’s surgery and her heart had already stopped again. AJ was going crazy and could barely function. Everyone had stepped up to take care of the boys and to take turns with him at the hospital. No one wanted him to be by himself. It was Brian’s turn the day that Dr. Anderson asked to speak to AJ.

“I know you’re anxious to get back to Kat so I won’t make this very long.”

He waited until AJ and Brian had settled themselves into the chairs in the lounge before he started.

“I know that Kat’s heart stopped the other day. They got it shocked back into rhythm but I spoke to the nurse and the attending physician and they both agreed that it was a struggle.”

“Can’t you on in and check the patch? Maybe they did something wrong.” AJ asked rubbing his hand over his face.

“They put the patch in correctly and I’m afraid that if we go forward with any mores surgeries, it could actually cause more damage than what is already there.”

“Then find another way. I will pay for whoever needs to be here and……”

“It won’t matter who we get AJ.” Dr. Anderson said calmly. “This is a serious issue and can’t just be fixed with surgery. Kat’s body is tired and it’s been through so much…….”

“She’s been through so much! Don’t talk about her like she isn’t here and it’s just some body lying in there!” AJ yelled.

Brian reached out and put his hand on AJ’s arm. “No one is saying she’s not here J. He’s just trying to explain what’s going on.”

“Well he can do that without acting like she doesn’t exist!”

“I’m sorry AJ, I didn’t mean to sound insensitive. I’m just trying to do what’s best for Kat.”

“And exactly what is that?”

Dr. Anderson took a deep breath. He hated having these conversations with families but there was no putting this off any longer.

“I think it’s time that you consider signing a DNR order.”

“No fucking way!” AJ screamed. “I am NOT going to do that!”

“AJ please control yourself. I know that it is going to be hard on you to let go of Kat…”

“I am not letting go of Kat because I’m not signing that goddamn paper!”

Dr. Anderson decided to be hard on him in hopes that he would listen. “I hate to say this AJ but are you not signing the paper for Kat’s sake or yours?”

“What does that mean?”

“I mean that are you refusing to sign because you think she can make it or because you don’t want to lose her?”

The doctor’s question hit AJ hard. It took him a few minutes to think about what he said and he realized that this was not something he had even asked himself.

“I have some rounds to do but I will come by later this afternoon to speak to you again.” Dr. Anderson said rising from his seat. “I’ll respect your wishes but please consider what I said.”

Brian waited for the doctor to leave and then turned to AJ. “What do you want to do?”

“I honestly don’t know Bri.”

“I hate saying this to you but maybe you need to start thinking about all the options.”

AJ looked over at Brian and he expected to get a death stare but was shocked by his friend’s face. AJ looked crushed, sad, tired and countless other things.

“I think maybe we should have a family meeting.”

“Why don’t we go back to my house for just a little while and I’ll tell everyone to come over?” Brian asked.

“Ok.” AJ responded surprising his brother. “Let’s get this over with so I can get back to her.”