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Seventeen-year-old Nick Carter stood next to his best friend, Brent’s younger sister, Gwen as she tinkered with her father’s car. Since he was out of town there was really nothing that he could yell at her about. Besides when he came back his car would run with nothing but precision.

Gwen was two years younger than Brent and had inherited their grandmother’s coloring. Her black hair fell to her mid-back and was pulled back into a braid. Her eyes were a dark, emerald green and heavily lashed. Her complexion was ivory with a wild sprinkle of freckles a crossed her high cheekbones and small, straight nose. In fact most of her features were like a china dolls.

Even though she had just turned fifteen she had just entered the eleventh grade and it really made Brent upset that she was so smart. Never mind the fact that she was still a year behind him in school.

“When exactly did Brent say he was going to be back?” Nick asked impatiently. Brent had asked him to come over and then when he had shown up, no Brent insight.

Gwen slammed the hood down on her father’s car and started wiping the grease off of her hands and face before turning to him and saying, “Don’t you hear them coming down the street Carter?”

Ok so they didn’t exactly get along in fact Gwen really just hated Nick, always acting like he and Brent were so much better than her.

The family car pulled in and Brent jumped out the door before it had even pulled to a complete stop, “Hey Nick.”

“Brent. You really need to teach your sister some manners.”

Brent grinned. “Not my job.”

Their mother, Amber smiled at them, “Gwen, were you playing with your father’s car?”

Gwen smiled innocently at her mother, “No ma’am. I know that I’m not allowed to touch Daddy’s car without his permission.”

Amber nodded knowingly, “OK. As long as you weren’t.”

She cast Brent and Nick an exasperated look before walking inside.

“Hey Gwen here’s a hint. Next time you lie to Ma’s face make sure all of the grease is off your face.” Brent took the greasy rag from her hand and wiped a spot off her face.

“Go to hell,” She muttered under her breath before stomping away.

Nick watched her go and wondered exactly what it was about him that she didn’t like. He tried being nice to her but damn she tried his patience. Together he and Brent went for a walk while Brent caught him up about what was happening at the local high school.


Two Years Later


She was dead. Gwen had watched her mother die right in front of her. She stood in front of the open casket her lips trembled and her dark eyes shone with unshed tears. Her black dress was straight and unadorned. Her dark hair pulled back into a severe bun.

Off to the side Brent stood beside his father and Nick. He wasn’t nearly as affected by their mother’s death as Gwen. The one thing that bothered him about the whole affair was that Gwen hadn’t cried at all. She had been the closet one to their mother and the fact she wasn’t crying made him worried.

“Dad maybe I should take Gwen home. She’s not dealing with this well,” Brent said bringing his dad’s attention swinging back to him.

“No. She’s dealing perfectly fine. She needs to stay.” His voice was hard when he answered.

Brent nodded and then nodded at Nick, who already knew that his friend wanted. Silently he slipped away from the group and over to Gwen.

“Gwen come on let’s get out of here. You haven’t slept recently have you?” He asked taking her elbow and gently leading her out of the funeral home and to his car.

She was silent as she slid into the passenger’s seat, “Are you going to talk to me Gwen?”

“What’s there to talk about? Mom’s dead. Dad doesn’t care what happens to me, never has. It’s good for me to leave the funeral home right now. People will be coming by later and I don’t have anything prepared for them.”

“They don’t expect you to feed them. Why aren’t you crying?” He countered before turning toward the beach.

“What’s the point in it? Nick did you ever cry when anyone from the retirement home died?”

“Yeah. It’s part of the healing process. It’s perfectly ok to cry.”

“That’s not what Daddy said. He said that it was weak.”

She suddenly seemed to shrink when Nick looked at her while pulling off to the side of the road, “Up for a little hike?”

“Huh? What this isn’t home.”

Nick smiled gently, “Good deduction. Come on this is a good place to think. I’ll call Brent in a little bit to tell him where you are.”

She nodded, “OK. Lead the way.”

Nick walked over and opened her door and held his hand out. Hesitantly she took and he tenderly pulled her to her feet. He had slipped his shoes off while driving and to her he looked kind of funny standing their in dress slacks and a dress shirt with a loosened tie hanging. She slid her little flats off and let him guide her toward the waves.

In silence they walked hand in hand not even realizing what was going on around. Luckily the beach was deserted and no one was around to see the youngest backstreet boy member walking with his best friend’s little sister.

Gwen thought about what happened a few days ago. Why had she listened to her mother? Why hadn’t she called an ambulance? If she had then her mother would have still been alive and laughing.

Flashback

“I have to go away baby girl,” Amber said softly. “Don’t try and help me. Promise me you won’t call an ambulance. Promise me Gwenie. I can’t stay here anymore.”

“What about Brent and me? Don’t we matter?”

Amber put the glass to her lips. “Of course you do but sweetie I can’t take your father being gone.”

“Mama you can’t leave us. You can’t, we need you. Daddy is always gone. Who’s going to help us with our homework, whose going to cook dinner for us now?”

“You’ll have to do that do that now Gwen. Promise me you’ll help the world; protect everyone, especially Brent and Nick. You know how they like to get in trouble.” Amber wandered into the living room, her strength waning as she lied her body down on the couch, her only wishes had yet to be answered.

“I promise Mommy. I promise.” Gwen responded following her mother suddenly feeling like a five-year old little girl again.

“Good girl. Hold my hand for a few minutes baby. Always remember I love you and Brent.”

Gwen watched as her mother, closed her eyes and take her last shuddering breath, “Mommy! Mommy!”
End Flashback

“Mommy!” Gwen shouted falling to her knees, wrapping her arms around her waist.

Nick fell down beside her, “Gwen. Come on what’s wrong?”

Tears streamed down her face, “Don’t leave me Mommy. Don’t leave me.”

Tenderly Nick took her face in her hands, “Look at me. Gwen, look at me.”

Her eyes seemed to focus on his face, “I killed her. I killed her, Nick. She told me not to call an ambulance. She drank something.”

He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her tight against him, not knowing what to say. What was there to say, her mother had committed suicide and no one in their family knew why, except Gwen. “What’d she drink Gwen?”

“I don’t know but she must’ve hated us.” Tears soaked the front of Nick’s shirt.

Gently he was able to reposition her to where she was nestled in his lap, her face buried into his chest.

When he took her home, Brent was on the front porch pacing a hole into the flooring. Softly Nick shut his car door and moved around to the passenger side where Gwen was sleeping. After unbuckling her seatbelt he soothingly picked her up, and took her toward her brother.

All thoughts that were going through Brent’s head disappeared as he took in his sister’s sleeping, tear-stained face. He had no idea that their mother’s death that he had not only lost his mother but his sister as well.

Nick had always been so good at reading his friend’s mind but after listening to Gwen cry things out about how she and Brent didn’t matter, he had to wonder if things would ever be the same.