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It was a chilly autumn day when Kevin visited his father’s grave. It was raining every now and then and the wind was causing red, yellow and brown leaves to dance around in circles, being blown up into the air and softly swirling back down to the ground. He didn’t notice the rain was coming down again, he was just staring at the gravestone, feeling the ache in his heart. He now missed his father more than anything, now that his youngest friend was diagnosed with cancer. The illness had taken his father away from him after he fought it for so long.

Kevin closed his eyes briefly, trying to picture his father, wishing he could see the healthy, tan skinned man his father once was instead of the shell of a human he had been reduced too. The pale parlor of his skin that had clung losely to his frame, his eyes, which had lost their luster and sparkle, had gazed weakly into the world, nothing but defeat shining through them. Weight had dropped from his body the moment the chemotherapy had begun, leaving his father thin, feeble and bed-ridden, stealing away hope of moments Kevin desperately wished he could repeat.Times he had once shared with his dad, hiking through the mountains & running their camp together.

He took a deep breath and kneeled down next to the tombstone, then traced the engraved letters on the grey marble stone with his fingers, desperately in need of a fatherly hug or a conversation to keep him from falling apart. He knew he had to be strong for Nick, but for the others too. They’d be there for him if he let them, but he wanted them to be there for their youngest friend, because he was the one who needed everyone’s support the most at this moment. Kevin himself was known as the strong one, the one who could always keep the others from falling apart. This time, he wasn’t so sure he’d succeed in being the strongest, yet it felt as if he had no choice.

“Kevin?”
He looked around, surprised to hear someone say his name at a place like this, especially since he went there by himself. The others stayed with Nick, trying to pull him through another day. Brian had offered to join him, but he declined. He wanted some time alone with his dad and he didn’t feel the need to tell him his reasons. He told Brian he should stay with Nick and the others and his cousin agreed.
“Kevin, over here.”
Kevin turned around to where the sound came from, and almost fainted when he saw the one who had called out his name. “D-dad?” he somehow managed to choke out. He couldn’t believe his own eyes, before him stood his father, as strong as if he had never been ill, as if he never died. The man laughed at the shocked expression on his son’s face. “That’s me if I recall correctly.”
“I-I miss you, dad.” Kevin stuttered as he got to his feet.
His father walked up to him, putting his hands on Kevin’s shoulders, after which he met his son’s gaze. “I know, son.. I know. I’ve seen the things you’ve been through. At home, but with your friends too. I’m sorry I wasn’t there to help you.”
Kevin still found it hard to believe this was actually happening. He put his hands in the pockets of his jeans, and shrugged. If his dad saw what had happened with the guys, he was sure he also saw the many breakdowns he had over his death. “I’m sorry I wasn’t strong enough. I.. All I ever wanted to do was make you proud of me..”
“I am, son. I’m so proud of you You’re a strong man, Kevin. Way stronger than you even realize at this point.” His father took a deep breath before he continued. “Please tell your mother I love her, Kevin, but that it’s okay for her to move on. I know she still loves me, and that she always will, but she doesn’t need to feel guilty when the time arrives she feels heart’s opening up again. Will you do that for me, son?”

Kevin fought back the tears as he nodded. “Why won’t you tell her yourself?” he whispered.
His father closed his eyes for a second before he answered his son’s question. “I can’t.”
“W-why not? You’re telling me now, why..” His father interrupted his son as he let go of him. “Because I wasn’t brought down here to talk to you.. I was sent for another reason, but He told me I could talk to you for a second since you were by yourself.”
“W-what other reason?” Kevin stuttered as he suddenly felt so cold, as if it was freezing. Out of nowhere he felt someone gently patting his back, and as he turned around to see who was doing that, his jaw dropped. His eyes darted from his father to the other man, confused at the situation, in denial of what this might mean.

“That’s the reason He sent me, Kevin. I’ll guide him to the big upstairs.”
“But..no.. that..” Kevin tried so hard to speak his mind, but he couldn’t think straight, and all what came out of his mouth were random words, not making any sense.
“My time has come, Kev.” The young one calmly said, as he pulled his older friend into a hug. “It’s just my time, it’s okay.” Kevin, who was still holding his friend with all his strength, finally found the energy to speak again, even though his voice was quivering. “It’s okay? It’s NOT okay, Nick.. It’s not.. You.. WE aren’t done fighting this, you were supposed to win this fight, not give up..”
“I didn’t give up, Kev. I never gave up. It’s just my time to go.” Nick ruffled Kevin’s hair as he let go of him. “I just want to thank you for everything, Kev. Even though you were always on my case and I hated it back then, I now know you only did it to protect me, shelter me from the bad in this world.” Nick, who looked as healthy as he did before the illness really got to him, smiled. “Thank you for being there for me through the whole cancer-thing, I know it was extremely hard on you..”

“We should be going, Nick. They’re waiting for us.” Kevin’s father said as he pointed up at the sky. Nick nodded, then turned his attention back to his friend. “Don’t be sad, Kev. You know I’m in good hands. Just.. don’t forget me, alright?” Again, he pulled his friend into a big hug, holding him tight when he whispered in his ear. “I love you man.. Tell the others I love them too.. especially Rok. He needs it the most, okay? Don’t let him lose his faith. Tell them where I’m headed, that it’s alright. Remember me as the annoying kid, not as how I left this world. I love you.” With that, Nick let go of his friend and walked over to where his guide was standing. He heard Kevin whisper “I love you, kid..” and turned his head to look at him, with the biggest smile on his face. Then right before Kevin’s eyes, he disappeared, as if the two men had never been there in the first place.

Kevin almost passed out, as he finally realized what had happened right before his own eyes. His father. He had talked to his father. And then Nick. Kevin shook his head, choosing not to believe this nonsense. This had just been nothing more than his imagination, none of this was real. Then he noticed the vibration of his cell in his pocket. With shaking hands, he pulled it out, looked at the display and flipped it open, placing it to his right ear. “Brian?”
The person on the other end didn’t say a word, but Kevin could tell he was crying. “Brian?” he repeated. “What’s going on?”
He heard some noise, followed by A.J.’s voice who had probably grabbed the phone out of Brian’s hand. He was obviously crying as well. “He’s gone, Kev..Nick.. he’s gone..” When his brain had processed those words, Kevin dropped the phone and fell to his knees. It had been real, Nick was there to say goodbye. His little brother.. Kevin looked up at the sky, knowing that was where his little brother was headed to. His eyes filled up with tears, his heart was being ripped apart. As the tears began to roll down his cheeks, a deep loud cry escaped his lips...