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“She said I..” He trailed off, tears running down his cheeks as he thought of what the near future would bring. “Nicky?” Kevin asked as he stepped forward, looking at his youngest friend who seemed to be extremely distraught. Brian put his hands on Nick’s shoulders, gently shaking him in an attempt to bring him back to reality. It didn’t work though. Nick felt life being drained from his body by the message Dr. Schagen had for him. As realization sank in, black spots clouded his vision and he felt how his body gave way to the exhaustion. “Brian!” he heard a voice in the distance yell, but he couldn’t tell whose voice it was. As he went down, he felt how someone caught him right before he hit the ground.

“Brian!!” Kevin repeated as he flew forward.
“I’ve got him!” Brian replied as he still staggered somewhat under Nick’s weight, who lied limply in his arms.
“DOCTOR!! We need a doctor in here!!” Kevin shouted.
“Nick!! Wake up buddy!!” Brian pleaded as he kneeled down, resting Nick’s body on his knee. “Is he still breathing?” Howie panicked as he knelt down next to Brian, after which he tried to find Nick’s pulse. “God no..” A.J. whispered as he rubbed his face, unable to move and get help. “WHAT is taking them so damn long?! DOCTOR!!” Kevin bellowed, but before he could finish his sentence, nurses came running towards the men.

Five minutes later, the four men found themselves in the family room, waiting for information about Nick’s situation. Waiting, again. A.J. shook his head, he felt like he had his answer now. It was not possible to die from anxiety, but the feelings he experienced came pretty close to being dead, or so he thought. He was feeling numb, like nothing could hurt him. He was about to find out that this was not true when two people started a conversation.

“What do you think she told him?” Brian asked his cousin as he watched him pacing up and down the small family room.
Kevin shook his head as he raked his hands through his hair. “I don’t know.. it could go both ways, but..” he trailed off, his voice quivering with fear.
“I think this is it.. Seeing how devastated he was, I-” Brian whispered.
“DON’T say what you were about to say.” A.J. shouted. “You don’t know what she said.. you don’t know what she said.. you don’t know.. you don’t know..” he softly repeated over and over again as he rocked back and forth in his chair, his head down and his shoulders shaking as he cried, finally showing his emotions.

A few seconds later he felt how one of them pulled him into a hug and for once he let it happen. “No, we don’t know.” Howie soothed as he looked at Kevin as he mouthed “Finally”. The eldest nodded in response as he walked up to the two and placed his hand on A.J.’s shoulder, who continued to cry. “He can’t die.. He can’t.. Not Nick. Not after all the shit we’ve been through together.”

“It must have been hard, taking care of Nicky all that time.” Kevin sat down next to him, hoping his friend would open up some more.
Howie slowly let go of A.J., who wiped his eyes and let out a sigh. “It wasn’t that bad.”
“Jay..” Brian frowned.

“What do you want me to say, Brian? That he repeatedly threw stuff at me because he was angry with me for ‘making’ him go through with the treatments? That sometimes he threw up fifteen times in one night so I could change the sheets 5 times during that same night? That he begged me to make it stop, to make the pain go away because he’d rather be dead than suffering like that? That because of that, I made sure he didn’t have acces to any knifes or pills, because I was scared he was gonna hurt himself? That I frequently slept on the floor of his room because of the nightmares he had? That it was sometimes impossible to wake him from those nightmares so I couldn’t do anything but listen to him screaming and crying for help? That I held him during every anger or crying fit he had and that he hated me for it? That I checked on him at least five times a night, to see if he was still breathing? So yeah, it was like being in hell. But I would do it again in a heartbeat, because he needed me.”

“Jesus..” Howie breathed. They all knew things had been difficult at A.J.’s place, but none of them knew how hard they had really been and none of them had expected it to be this horrible. “Why didn’t you say anything?”
“Because.. Nick made me promise not to. He was so ashamed of his behavior that he didn’t want any of you to know. And he didn’t want you to worry about him even more.”
“But-”
“Gentlemen?” Dr. Schagen interrupted as she walked in. Four men turned to look at her, trying to read the expression on her face as they waited for her to fill them in on Nick’s condition. Brian was the first to break out of his stupor, so he stood up and walked up to her, hands shoved in his pockets to hide the fact that they were shaking. “H-how is he?” he stuttered.

“He’s okay.”
All four breathed a sigh of relief and Dr. Schagen smiled before she continued. “I guess he gave you quite a scare earlier. The whole situation got a bit too much for him to handle, the jetlag, emotional rollercoaster and results, his body and mind couldn’t handle it all, and his body responded by having Nick faint.”
Some of the tension dissolved, but there was one question they still needed answered.
“Speaking of the results, can you..” Kevin hesitated. Even though he knew he’d find out anyway, he wasn’t sure he wanted to know right now. What if-
She interrupted his thoughts. “I’m sorry.” She shook her head, and noticed how the room again immediately filled with tension accomponied with feelings of great disappointment. “Nick wants to tell you himself.” She rushed out. “You can go see him if you want. He’s at the end of the hall on your left, room 236.”

Three men thanked her before they walked out of the family room, but Brian stayed behind. “Doctor, can I ask you something?” he said, shifting on his feet, feeling uneasy and unsure if it was his place to ask.
“Sure you can, Brian.” She smiled, sensing he was uncomfortable with the situation.
“Why did you wanna speak to Nick alone. I mean-”
“Who told you I wanted that?” she frowned. “I thought it was weird he came in alone since you stayed with him during all of the testing, but I felt it wasn’t my place to ask.”
“But..” Now it was Brian’s turn to frown. “So, you didn’t forbid us coming along?”
“Heavens no. Where did you get that idea? We think that it’s best if someone’s with the patient, since two can hold more information in such emotional times.”
“I guess it was all one big misunderstanding then..” Brian replied, a hint of anger could be heard in his voice. Now Nick had gone through all of that alone, when he could’ve been there with him.

“Brian!” she repeated. Brian turned his attention back to her and realized he hadn’t heard what she said. When she noticed she had his attention again, she repeated herself. “Who told you that I didn’t want you there?”
“The lady at the reception desk.” He tried to remember how she looked like, but didn’t come up with that much useful information. “A young woman and I think she was a brunette.”
Dr. Schagen shook her head and let out a sigh. “I think I know enough. I’ll go talk to her, because this is unacceptable. I’m so sorry that she gave you the wrong idea.”
“It’s not your fault, but yes, it is unacceptable.” Brian gave her a weak smile. “I think I’d better go see Nick now.”
“Yes, I think you should.” She replied. “Again, I’m so sorry for all of this.”
Brian nodded as he walked out of the family room.

Once outside, he stopped for a moment. He could still feel Nick lying in his arms, see himself staggering under his friend’s weight, even though Nick was underweight. He had never expected that to happen, catching his best friend, but then again, he had never expected any of this to happen. He knew he had to go see him, but he was scared to. Just like his cousin, he wanted to know, but didn’t wanna know at the same time. This could be it. Life or death. A future for the five of them, or nothing but the past. With his hands still shoved in his pockets and dragging his feet, he slowly made his way to the end of the hall, then stopped right before room 236. For nothing more than four seconds, he glanced up at the ceiling, then whispered his one and only wish. “Please, give us a break.. Give us a future.. ”

So yes, this was me again.. Me = Nijntje. Hope you liked it.. Next chapter will be written by me too.. But not sure when I'll be able to update though.. I think I was pretty fast this time ;o) Thanks for reading!