Veronica Peterson wrapped up the remains of her sandwich and stood, throwing the crumpled paper into the garbage can before returning to the picnic bench and taking a sip of her water. God her lunch was almost over and she really didn’t want to go, that was what she always thought when it was time to go back to work, it was nothing new. Lunch was never fulfilling or exciting, it was just lunch and time she usually spent alone. Thirty minutes to relax and thirty minutes to remember everything that depressed or bothered her, which in the end cancelled out the whole relaxing thing. Looking out across the parking lot, she sighed heavily, she really wanted to be anywhere but here. Still, the sad thing was she’d rather sit and think of the things that bothered her than go and work.
Standing, she made her way in, looking at the clock, five minutes left. That gave her just enough time to walk back and punch in. Turning she made her way past the registers and to the entrance of the store. She’d been working in the same grocery store for about six years, and she was thoroughly sick of it.
She needed a change, she needed to do what she went to school for, what she’d spent obscene amounts of money on textbooks for, but she wasn’t.
There were times when she felt she never would, it’d be so easy to stay stuck where she was because it was comfortable and familiar, but then she’d never grow, never flourish. At least that’s what she kept telling herself, it was the truth no doubt, but it was hard to hear, hard to remember when she stepped outside the bubble and had to actually take the initiative. Taking that step was scary though, it really was. Life was full of risks, she had to learn to take more chances.
She watched as her co-workers flirted with some of the guys who also worked there, giggling and teasing openly, she sighed heavily. Veronica always tried so hard not to notice, but it was nearly impossible, all of her insecurities wrapped into a size six frame. She wasn’t bad looking of course; she’d just never be small, or petite. Oh, she did her share of flirting and teasing, but it wasn’t like them. Like the ones who never said anything stupid, the ones who were always put together, who laughed softly and always knew exactly what to say. She wasn’t like them, she’d never been. Even back in high school, she’d never been comfortable with herself. Her Brother on the other hand was everything she wasn’t. Popular, well known, outgoing. He played football and all the girls knew him. With that popularity, came the ever present nickname for her as “Bryan’s Little Sister” which was nice maybe first five times, but she went through the rest of her school life affectionately referred to as “Bryan’s Little Sister” and it got old quickly. It went on even after he graduated and here at work every so often a friend of his would come in and all of a sudden she was “Bryan’s Sister” again. Sometimes it was like she had no identity away from him and she was tired of it, very tired of it.
No one understood what it felt like and thought she was overreacting. She knew better, so she went out of her way to be different than him, different style of clothes, different taste in music, anything so she’d have some kind of identity all her own. And it worked for the most part, aside from the fact that everyone swore they were twins, but three years difference made that impossible. So for now she’d deal. She was no whiner; at least she tried not to be.
Making her way through the double doors, she walked over to the time clock, right on time. She punched in her number and walked back out, heading back over to her department.