“So I said to her, we should ya know, go out for lunch sometime and she was like, yeah. I’m excited, I’ve been trying to hang with her for months now…hey, you listening Carter?”
Nick looked over at AJ blankly, blinking rapidly. No he wasn’t listening, not really. He was preoccupied. Trying to focus on everything but the fact that they were thousands of feet off the ground and that AJ was rambling incessantly about some woman. He should be paying attention so that he wasn’t thinking about it, but he couldn’t. For some reason he just couldn’t concentrate. Why was he the one who always got stuck with AJ on flights? AJ always seemed to somehow get the same flight as Nick, even though they were flying privately.
“Nick? You ok man?”
“Yeah, I’m alright J, just can’t focus for some reason.”
“Well try, I’ve got more to tell you.”
Nick rolled his eyes.
“Don’t roll ya eyes at me, you’re gonna listen and like it.”
Nick looked over at him, raising an eyebrow.
“Ok then. Anyway, so I asked her when would be a good time, and she said next week and I’m like, I’m going out of the US for two weeks and that I could let her know when I got back and we could set something up. So she gave me her number and yeah,” AJ finished, beaming.
Nick continued to stare at him.
AJ’s smile slowly faded into a glare, “You’re an ass.”
“Hey, I told you I couldn’t focus.”
Sighing, AJ shook his head, “Whatever, so how bout we talk about you? Maybe that’ll work out cause you don’t have to listen much, just answer.”
“AJ, I don’t…”
“How’s things with you? Heard from your parents?
“AJ…”
“How bout your Brother or Sisters?”
“AJ…”
“When’s the last time you showered?”
“AJ!”
“Ya know, if you were a girl, you calling my name over and over like that would turn me on. Since you’re Nick, it’s annoying and pathetic. Answer the questions.”
Nick fought down the wave of annoyance; the only way he’d possibly get AJ to shut up would be to answer.
“Fine, no, no again and this morning. There, happy now?”
“Why don’t you call them?”
“Cause I don’t want to.”
“That’s pretty shitty.”
“C’mon AJ, you know how my family are. I don’t need to get involved in their fucked up family drama. I’m sick of it.”
“Your parents, fine, but what about your Brother and Sisters though? This isn’t their fault.”
“I know, but I just…can’t deal with them now.”
AJ stared at him.
“Don’t do that J, don’t ok? You don’t know what it’s like.” Nick cringed immediately, AJ knew, his situation wasn’t identical, but he knew what it was like on some level nonetheless. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be, you’re right, I don’t know.”
“Just because your situation isn’t the same, doesn’t mean you don’t understand. Sorry, that was a fucked up thing to say.”
“Nick, look man. No matter how you slice it, what’s going on with your family sucks, it flat out sucks. I get that, my family, well my Dad I should say, screwed Mom and me over big time. But ya move on, ya keep living. I dunno, I can’t say that if I had Brothers or Sisters that I wouldn’t do the same thing. What I can say is that looking on as someone with no siblings, that you’re damn lucky and that you should try to be there for them if nothing at all. Ya gotta stick together, specially now, know what I’m sayin’?”
Looking away he nodded, he did know, he knew all of that. It made sense, but for some reason it just wasn’t enough for him.
“If anything, these two weeks will give ya a chance to think, or take your mind off it I guess, whatever you want it to do.”
“Yeah, I know. Part of me though, doesn’t wanna do this, does that make me bad? That I’d rather be at home bullshittin’ around. ”
“Nah, we’ve been doing this shit for years.” AJ gave a harsh chuckle, “You’d think it’d get easier, it doesn’t. The outcome is great and all, but damn,” he sighed.
Nick nodded, giving AJ a small smile.
AJ gave him a quick nod, “Alright, I’m gonna try to get some sleep. All this turbulence is making me feel sick.” Rolling to the side a bit he rested his head on the pillow he’d propped up against the window and closed his eyes.
Nick watched him from his seat across the aisle. AJ’d been through a lot, way more than he had, but he was still here and he was happy and healthy for the most part. In a lot of ways, Nick looked up to him, though he’d never tell AJ that, he’d most likely bring it up every chance he got and tease him about it.
Riffling through his bag, he pulled his headphones and CD player out, then his cd wallet. After careful consideration, he whipped a cd out, put it in and started it, resting his head against the pillow. He couldn’t stand flying, flying in private planes like this was nice, had his pick of where he wanted to sit; still it didn’t really make it any easier. No matter where he sat though, he didn’t like lying across the seat when he slept. If he kept his back to the window and kind of propped his feet up on the seats, it wasn’t so bad. Cramped and uncomfortable, but not too bad. It was easier in the long run to just rest his head against the window with his seat reclining. He’d have to choose what he was gonna do soon.
Nick stared out blankly, thinking. Maybe he should call his parents, his Brother and Sisters at least. Why did the thought of that make him so nervous? It was his family after all, but he was afraid of what he may hear. What crazy thing would his Mom do next? What would his Dad accuse his Mom of doing now? It was just too much, too much to think about.
Too hard.
Shaking his head he let his thoughts wander. What would they be doing these two weeks? For as many years as he’d done this, he never quite knew what to expect. He was glad he didn’t have to organize anything, that there was someone doing it for him. Granted he liked to be a part of everything, but the small details, someone else could do. When it came to the important things however, they were never really taken seriously. Writing or recording, or even picking what songs would be released, they were never really privy too. Someone was always doing that for them too, things they should be doing.
He had to stop thinking about that too, it made him mad and he needed to sleep. He closed his eyes then opened them right back up again. Had Veronica read his email yet? Hopefully he’d be able to talk to her soon, he’d only chatted with her once, but he really enjoyed it. Hell, he just liked keeping in touch with her period.
Yawning, he closed his eyes again. Shifting he let his seat back and turned so his head rested against the window. He’d suffer and if he was lucky, he could sleep through the rest of the flight too.
