Nick drew in a sharp breath as he tried to fasten the button on his jeans. He knew that something was definately not right with himself, but he had tossed it off as thinking he would get better, it was just after effects from having the mumps a few months ago.

Dieting hadn’t seem to have made much difference in his appearance. Management never really let that issue go. The arrest didn’t help in matters much either. Once the media had gotten wind of that night, Nick was hounded day and night by reporters, people he used to think were his friends were teasing him. MJ from the radio was no exception to that rule either. When Nick discovered that they had dedicated sections of the radio station’s webpage, he retreated further into his shell, wanting to hide from everyone and everything.

Depression set in and with depression came the binge eating. Throwing up helped out with some of it - not by his choice - but Nick couldn’t help but notice that although the scales pretty much stayed within a 5-10 pound fluctuation, his stomach still looked like it was getting puffier.

Crying out from the pain, Nick realized that something had to be done and his making the doctors appointment for this morning was in his best interests. Taking the jeans off, he pulled out a pair of navy blue sweats and slipped them on. Sweats had been his only friend for the past few months. It was the only thing that seemed to not bother his stomach as much.

Taking a look into the full length mirror, he was disgusted at the reflection. He decided he looked fat.

“Well the N’sync fans are probably liking this,” Nick mumbled as he closed the closet doors. Slipping on his ball cap and grabbing his wallet and keys, he headed out to the garage and climbed into the baby blue BMW convertable.

The drive wasn’t long enough, Nick decided as he pulled into the parking lot of Dr. Greg Santos, MD. He had never been to this doctor before but after talking with his family doctor on the phone about his symptoms, he referred Nick to this specialist, which actually had Nick a bit scared.

Pulling the bill of the cap down onto his forehead, Nick silently prayed he wouldn’t encounter anyone. The Florida morning sunshine was bright and Nick cursed himself for leaving his sunglasses in the car as he approached the building. Once inside, he was momentairly blinded by the darkness.

The smell of the office indicated that new carpet had been laid recently and the walls freshly painted. The scent touched off his asthma and he coughed lightly a couple of times before he approached the receptionist’s window.

“I have a 9 o’clock appointment with Dr. um....” Nick hesistated trying to remember the name.

“Dr. Santos?”

“Yeah, that’s the one,” he grinned nervously.

“Have a seat, I’ll let them know you’re here,” the red haired woman replied as she picked up the receiver and dailed a number.

Retreating to the farthest corner of the waiting room, Nick was thankful that it was empty. The music that was piped into the office was typical elevator music and the magazines on the tables ranged from People to Modern Maturity and Social Security Living.

Nick became annoyed when his nose started running. At least he wasn’t coughing anymore but the office definately wasn’t a friend to his allergies for some reason. Must be the fresh paint, he decided. As he reached for a tissue, a nurse appeared in the office doorway.

“Nick?”

Without hesitating, Nick followed the woman through the maze of halls. Instead of going into another room, she stopped by the scales.

“Can we just skip this part?” Nick pleaded with a slight smile.

The nurse chuckled. “I thought women were the only ones self conscious about our weight, nope, hop on, I promise it won’t hurt,” she stated as she gestured to the scale with her pen.

“Peachy,” Nick mumbled as he stood on the digital scale.

“Two twenty-nine,” she stated mechanically. “Follow me.”

Nick rolled his eyes when he heard the numbers for his weight. No doctor’s scales were ever right in his opinion, his home scales said he weighed two twenty-two and that was yesterday morning. Before he got sick his weight usually fell between 210 to 215 ranges. His weight had definately gone up.

After the nurse checked his blood pressure and noted that his temperature was 100.1, and talked about why Nick was here to see the doctor, she closed the chart and told Nick that Dr. Santos would be in to see him in a few minutes.

The door closed and Nick was left alone in the quiet room. Alone with his thoughts.

The wait gave him more time to wonder if this was really such a good idea. He started to think again that it was just a weight problem and nothing more. Nick decided that he would be too embarrassed to hear the doctor tell him that he just needed to diet and exercise more and he started to stand up to leave.

The door opened and a tall, older pepper haired Latino man entered the room.

“Hi Nick, I’m Dr. Greg,” he said as he offered his hand for Nick to shake.

Nervously, Nick took his hand and gave him a firm handshake.

“I talked with Dr. Messner yesterday and he told me about what’s been going on with you, but I would like to hear your side of the story now,” Dr. Santos started out as he sat down on the stool and placed the chart on the counter.

“Um...” Nick was still unsure if he really needed to be there and he ran the palms of his hands back and forth on his sweatpants. “Well, I’ve been getting sick and um, I had the mumps a few months ago and um, well, um it’s probably nothing...” his voice trailed off, he didn’t even want to make eye contact with the doctor he felt so silly about being there to begin with. “I’m probably wasting your time.”

“Nonesense!” the doctor smiled. “Why don’t you hop up onto the table and I’ll check your stomach.”

‘Great,’ Nick thought to himself. ‘He’s gonna see my gut and know that I’ve been sitting on my ass and letting myself get soft. Bruce is right, I should stick to lettuce.’

It took only two seconds when Dr. Santos started pressing onto his stomach that Nick cried out sharply.

“Oooh.”

“Sorry,” the doctor apologized. Instead of stopping, he kept palpitating Nick’s stomach pressing down and each time he pressed, Nick cried out in pain. Once the doctor had finally finished with examining Nick’s stomach he had him sit up and he felt the sides of his neck and under his arms.

“Excuse me for a moment, I’ll be right back,” Dr. Santos stated as he quickly left the room.

Nick wasn’t sure what was going on, but he was a little concerned that the doctor had caused so much pain by pressing on his stomach. After roughly five agonizing minutes, the doctor returned to the exam room.

“Nick, I’d like to have you admitted to the hospital for tests---”

“Absolutely not! I can’t, my schedule is too strict,” Nick lied when he interrupted the doctor. He could bend his schedule but he didn’t want to admit to the man that he was deathly afraid of hospitals and more importantly needles.

“I had the feeling you would react that way. I’ve scheduled some tests to be done and I guess you’ll just have to plan on spending the rest of today at the hospital then. Can I ask why you don’t want to stay overnight at the hospital?”

“Um, well, I have to fly out to Cali in a day and it’s just too hard to explain I guess,” Nick mumbled.

“I see,” the doctor gazed at Nick over the tops of the reading glasses that were perched on the end of his nose. “Okay, well then, you need to go to St. Mary’s outpatient and they will be waiting for you. I guess you will have to call me for the results the day after tomorrow.”

“What kind of tests?”

“I’ve ordered blood draws, a MRI and a cat scan, they’re pretty painfree Nick, well the blood draw I’m sure you’ve had one before, but the other tests are just simple x rays, nothing to get worked up over,” Dr. Santos smiled.

Nick swollowed nervously. “What do you think is wrong with me?”

The smiled faded from Dr. Santos’ face. He sighed before speaking. “I’m not sure yet and I won’t know until all the test results are back. Your spleen is enlarged and I felt a few swollen lymph glands.”

“So what does that mean? I’ve still got the mumps?”

“No Nick, this could be anything from a bad case of mono up towards something very serious.”

Nick could tell the doctor was hiding something from him. “Serious as in?”

“I’m suspecting cancer.”