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15
I couldn't believe that I lost it like that in front of a bunch of guys. A bunch of older guys who, most likely would make fun of me because of it for the rest of my life. But then again why was I even worrying about that when our situation seemed so much worse then me losing it. After all I was just a stupid kid as AJ so eloquently put it.

I sniffled on Kevin's shoulder. Poor guy. I really made his shirt sleeve wet. I don't think he had a clue what to do about it. None of them did. They all just kind of sat there watching me. I guess it was better than staring at the walls. As for Kevin, he just kept rubbing my back and making the shhhh sound.

When I finally stopped, which seemed like an eternity later, it was Brian that broke the silence. "Nicky, it's really okay. We just don't want you to get hurt that's all. Kevin just yells when he is worried" He gave his cousin a stern look.

"I'm sorry for losing it like that guys. I'm also sorry for being stupid and running out. Kevin was totally right"

"It's not a matter of who is right and who is wrong Nick, we just don't want you to be hurt that's all" Kevin was quick to say. It felt good hearing him say it but I didn't really believe him. I wanted to though. I really did.

"So, what should we do now Kevin?" Howie asked now that my little drama was subsiding.

"There's not much we can do Howie, let's just try to make the best of this situation. It'll all be over soon enough. It has to be"

"I just hope you're right. This has been really strange don't you think?"

"Uh...yeah I do" Kevin laughed. It was weird, because he was always so serious but the fact that he found humor in this situation eased my mind a little bit. It didn't all feel so grave that way.

"How about we get some more sleep? I for one can use a few extra hours myself" AJ said now sneaking onto the bed that Kevin had vacated.

"Hey!" It was too late for Kev as AJ landed on the cot and pulled the covers over his head. He sighed deeply and sat back down next to me.

"Kev, you can have my cot. I'll stay here with Nick"

"You sure Bri?"

"Yeah, I'm not really that sleepy anyway" Kevin looked over at me and gave me a smile. He looked really tired and worn out. Big dark circles were under his slightly swollen eyes. And the bruise from where Jim had punched him was really beginning to look nasty. He looked awful. I was suddenly glad he opted for some extra sleep. I think out of us all he needed it the most.

"Thanks cousin" Brian nodded.

We sat quiet for about an hour. Just listening to the others sleep. I was still a little uncomfortable around Brian. I looked up to him and thought he was cooler than all the Eskimos in Alaska, but I still felt unsure of how he viewed me. That whole little incident where he told AJ I lost it didn't do much to add to my confidence either.

"Why don't you take out your Gameboy and we'll compete or something"

"Jim took it from me. He stole my Nintendo and my Gameboy"

"Aww we could have really used it about now" Brian said looking at the boarded up window and sighing.

"Brian..tell me about home" He looked over at me kind of surprised.

"Alright. What do you want to know?"

"I don't know, anything you feel like telling me" His voice calmed me down and since there was no radio or television to help, he had to do.

"Well...I live in this neat house with my parents, who are the best"

"They are pretty cool" I said. He laughed.

"Thanks, I'm glad you approve"

"Was it a big house?"

"Not that big. I mean it was about normal for four people to grow up in" I nodded picturing how cool it would have been to grow up with the Littrells. Have two older brothers to watch over me. Sometimes I hated being the oldest. And if anyone would have been a perfect older brother for me it would be Brian.

"What about you squirt? Tell me about your home?" I shrugged. My life didn't seem as exciting as his.

"Not too much to tell. You know my Mom and my whole family"

"Yeah I do, but not really. What do you want to be when you grow up?" I rolled my eyes at him. "I want to be rich, and have girls hanging on both of my arms"

"Really? wow!" He seemed surprised by my answer.

"Yeah so this way they can hold my Gameboy for me so I don't get all tired doing it myself" He let out a huge laugh at that one.

"Guys shut up we are trying to sleep!" Howie growled. I stuck out my tongue at him even though he wasn't looking. Brian was just laughing at me. I think I amused him.

"When I get rich and famous, I am going to buy my Dad a boat and my Mom a house" I said proudly. "She has always wanted a huge house for all of us. The one we are staying in now is pretty small"

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah. It's a two bedroom. Aaron and I actually sleep in the dining room. The girls have the real bedroom" He smiled. I think I saw just a slight glimmer of pity in his eyes. That made me stop. "So, anyways...you going to your high school graduation this year?"

"Actually I don't graduate until next year"

"Oh...Sorry" I felt stupid.

"No, it's okay. I stayed back because of my health. I'm alive that's all that matters"

"I'm glad you're alive" God could I sound any stupider?

He tousled my hair, "Yeah me too buddy" He pulled me towards him and started to wrestle me to the ground. He was tickling my neck and I was kicking at him when suddenly... he stopped.

"Oh my gosh" He said getting off of me and making his way to where the boarded window was. I stood up and followed him. "What?" I asked trying to find exactly what it was he was looking at. He walked over and woke his cousin up, "Kevin get up! I think I found us a way out of here"

I still had no idea what he was talking about. I thought he had lost his mind. Kevin jumped out of bed and ran, for whatever reason. I laughed. "Where? What are you talking about Bri?" Brian walked over to where the window was and pointed. I still couldn't see it but Kevin seemed really happy. "How in the hell did we miss that before?" He asked Brian as he grabbed a chair and started to climb.

"What? What is it? will someone please tell me what you see up there?" I asked jumping up and down hoping to get a better look.

"It's another window" Brian said suddenly growing impatient with me.

"Really?" I asked totally ignored.

"So Kevin, do you think you can reach it?" Kevin grabbed a chair and made his way over to where the window was. It was directly above the boarded up one but almost to the ceiling. The loud noise woke both Howie and AJ who Brian promptly filled in. It took him forever to tell me but they within seconds, knew what was going on.

I kept trying to get into the middle of things but I was literally pushed away every time.

"Dammit! It's too high up, hold onto the chair would ya, I'm getting on my tippee toes" Howie and Brian reached for the chair as Kevin stretched as far as he could. I still couldn't see it from where I was. The wood over the lower window was blocking my view. That and the overall height of the thing. The ceiling in that place was so high, I knew there was no way Kevin was going to be able to reach it. Not without my help.

"Kev, why don't you hoist me up there?" I asked bravely walking towards him.

"Hey that's a great idea" Kevin countered, "AJ come over here front and center. I'm gonna try to get you high enough to reach this"

"Why me? The pip squeak volunteered, I didn't"

"That's just it, he IS a pip squeak. Too small. I need you!" I walked over and sat on the cot sulking. How dare he think I was too small to help. So he calls on AJ? AJ who happens to be only a few inches taller than me. I watched as AJ made his way over to Kevin and tried to stand on the chair next to him. The chair looked like it was going to wobble and fall under both of their weight. Luckily it didn't. Howie and Brian were now holding the chair with all their might while Kevin extended his two hands down making a step for AJ to climb onto. The scene was a little comical.

AJ stepped on Kevin holding tight to Kev's shoulders, causing him to wince in pain. Kevin hoisted him up as far as he could without losing his own balance and having them both crash to the floor. Turns out that wasn't too high. Even with AJ reaching they didn't come close. I was able to see because I finally figured out that if I stood on the bed I would be able to see the action. The window in question was very high but also very small. There was no way that AJ would have been able to fit through it even if he was able to reach. There was no doubt in my mind that I was the only one who could fit through that tiny space.

Me the pip squeak!

Finally when it looked like Kevin was just about to drop his arms sending AJ to the floor, they decided to give up. He helped AJ down and then he also stepped down off of the chair. "Damn it all to hell!" He said frustrated.

"There was no way AJ could have fit through that thing anyways" I said still kind of ticked off at being dismissed so easily.

"I would have made myself fit" He said taking a seat on the chair he was just standing on.

"I would fit with no problem!"

"Yeah but Nick AJ couldn't reach it, there would be no way that you would" Howie now took a seat next to me on the cot as he continued, "Besides, what exactly would you do anyway once you got through...jump down?"

"Hells yeah!"

"Nick stop putting S's on everything! And no you wouldn't be able to jump down from there it's almost..well..high enough" Kevin said while pacing in front of the window.

"What was AJ gonna do then?"

"Nick stop acting like a child, why don't you take a nap or something" My jaw must have dropped to the floor because the look on my face caused both Brian and AJ to laugh.

"Nicky, your just too small to help that's all. It's nice of you to offer though" Gee thanks Howie, you know you aren't the Jolly Green Giant either! I couldn't believe them. I was their ticket out of there and they just kept dismissing me.

"Well, I think you guys are being dumb!" I shouted before turning away from them.

"God you really wanna help? Then go find something to play with and stop your whining!" I turned around and looked at AJ who really could be an ass when he wanted to be. I stuck my middle finger up at him. He laughed, "Do you even know what that means jerkass?"

"Yeah it means you should sit on it and spin you son of a .."

"ENOUGH!" Kevin shouted so loud he echoed throughout the tiny cabin. "I am not in the mood to deal with the two of you right now so shut the hell up and let me think!"

I turned back towards the door away from all of them. All I was to them was a kid. Nothing more or less. I would show them. I made it my mission to get us out of there. Then they would know who really ran the show!

Don't worry boys, Nick's coming to the rescue...