* * * Chapter 5 * * *

"Hey Els!" Meg called out to me when she saw my blond head of hair come in the door.

I heard her gasp quietly when she saw how pale my face was. I really did look bad ‘cause AJ rushed up to me from where he was leaning up against one of the walls in the dance room.

"Hi," I called to Meg as cheerfully as I could so she wouldn’t worry, even though I knew she would.

"Liz? Are you ok?" AJ asked as he grabbed my hand and pulled me aside.

"Sort of," I replied with a little sigh that I tried not to let him hear.

"Did you get something to eat?" he asked with genuine concern in his voice.

I was truly touched at how much he cared.

"Of course," I replied with a small smile. "I just didn’t get much sleep last night."

He didn’t ask anything further. I assumed that he’d just asked Nick later anyway. Fatima walked in the door and told the guys to sit or stand or whatever while she went over our dances with us to make sure we remembered. Meg, our ‘borrowed’ dancers from the Backstreet crew, and I all spread out on the floor to stretch. Gilli would be dancing with us as well as Sherri. Sherri, also known as Cher, had shoulder length curly blond hair that was always cute no matter what she did with it. She was about the same height as me, but she was definitely tanner than I am. For the dances that needed a pair, she’d be dancing with Beau. Everyone calls him BoBo. He’s got short wavy brown hair and he was very muscular for a 22-year-old dancer. Gilli would be dancing with Dylan, the blond hair brown eyed guy that everyone called Pickles.

"Let’s start with just Meg and Els going through this one for now," Fatima told the other dancers before she cued up the music.

We didn’t really do much dancing while we sang, mostly just snappy little moves here and there. In the new dance mix of the song we were practicing, there was a pause in the middle of the song where the ‘bridge’ was supposed to be. Meg and I stopped in the front center while two dancers were on her left and the other two were on my right. We looked up to the each other for one count, to the sky for another count before we looked at the ground and then both did back flips, landing on our feet before the music started again. The bass was loud and thumping, but that was the way I liked it. When we were done doing our back flips, I did a little dance that was then mimicked by the two dancers on my side while Meg did the same with ‘her’ dancers. The whole dance routine for the song was rather cute, yet it was also very easy for anyone to pick up. We had a lot of fun doing this dance and it was easily both our favorites so far. After that song was done, we went on to our other songs. We pretty much had everything down, besides needing a few pointers here and there, but that was expected. When we were finished, Fatima said that she wanted us to do ‘All For You’ (the first song that we practiced) again so we did. This time when the back flip came, I felt myself go weak just as I bent over backwards and when I landed, my foot slipped and I landed hard on the ground with a thud. Everyone rushed around me to see if I was ok. AJ started freaking out when he saw me fall.

"PLEASE...I’m fine...Just let me finish OK?" I yelled at everyone as I pushed their hands away and stood up by myself.

It made me a little annoyed that none of them thought I had the capability to get back up and finish the dance. We did the rest of it perfectly and when Fatima told us we were finished, I turned around and quickly headed for the door. ‘I might be tired, but I’m definitely not incapable of finishing one stupid dance’ I angrily thought to myself as I slammed the door open and briskly walked out the door. When I was out in the hall, I walked out to the lobby and wandered outside for a few minutes. I slid my sunglasses on and yanked my hair up into a sloppy bun. I sat down on the warm grass and looked at the people walking by on the sidewalk outside the gates that surrounded the building’s perimeters. When I was a little more relaxed, I lay back on the grass and closed my eyes while I let the suns rays turn my skin a nice pink color from the heat.

"Hey Liz...you better come in before you get burnt," I could hear Arti hollering to me from the front door of the building.

When I didn’t move, she walked out to where I was sitting and took a seat beside me.

"What happened in there?" she asked gently.

"I slipped...that’s all," I answered. "I’m sorry for yelling at everybody, but I’m tired of everyone treating me like the underdog here. I might not be as experienced in the whole ‘touring’ scene, but I do know what my limits are and I know what I can and can’t do."

"I know you were going to finish," she said as she put a hand on my shoulder. "You just need to show them how good you are."

"How can I show them how ‘good’ I am if they won’t give me the chance?" I asked as I pounded the ground a few times in frustration. "I’m not a baby...I might be younger than all of them, but I’m NOT a baby!"

"Come on. Let’s go inside," she said as she stood up and then held out her hand for me.

"Thanks for being here to listen to my whining," I said with a half smile. "I know it’s not what you’re paid for, but I’m glad I got to talk to ya."

"And don’t ever hesitate to talk to me," she said as she gave me a little hug. "I’ll always be here if ya need me."

She pulled the door open for me and I walked into the air-conditioned building. I left my sunglasses on, but pulled my hair out of the bun.

"Hey Cher..." I called out to Sherri down the hall a little ways. "Can you French braid?"

"Nope," she replied with an apologetic shrug. "But you might wanna ask Chauntellle. I think she knows how."

"Thanks," I replied before I walked into the dance room.

The dancers were lounging all over the place and the guys were right there lounging with them. Chauntelle was another one of the female dancers. She’s got long dark brown hair with piercing green eyes.

"Hey Chaun," I hollered to where she was sitting and talking with Cassidy (another female dancer), Damian (male dancer), Nick, and AJ.

"Yeah," she yelled out, not sure who had called her name.

I walked up behind her and played with her long hair that was in little braids. She tilted her head back and when she saw it was me, she gave me a smile.

"Hi Els," she said as she put her head back to its normal position and turned around a little to look at me. "What’s up?"

"Nothing really. Do you know how to French braid?" I asked her without looking at anyone else.

"Yeah! You want me to braid your hair?" she asked happily.

"Umm...just come with me K?"

"Ok..." she replied in a confused voice before she stood up and followed me to the door.

"Liz!"

AJ was calling my name as he stood up.

"Sorry...I’m busy. Take a number," I called out before walking out the door.

Chauntelle followed me until we got to the small lounge setup at the end of the hall. No one was there so I plopped down onto one of the comfy leather chairs and waited for her to do the same.

"So..." she said. "What’d ya need?"

"I was just wonderin how much you’d charge me to put my hair into little braids like yours..." I told her.

"Oh hun, I wouldn’t charge ya. Hey! We’re gonna have a girlie party on our bus Wednesday night when the busses come. I’ll do it then k?" she said with a cute smile.

"Ok. Thanks!" I exclaimed happily. "So...I guess you can braid my hair right now so it doesn’t look like we just took off. And don’t tell anyone about our braiding session on Wednesday k?"

"K."

When she was done, I thanked her before she went back to the dance room. Fatima was going over dances with our dancers (Gilli, Cher, BoBo, and Pickles) so the rest of us had a little free time until we had to go back to work on vocals.

"Hey," AJ said as he walked in and sat down on a chair that was across from me.

"Hi," I replied with a little halfhearted smile before I turned and stared at the tree next to me that suddenly became rather interesting.

"What’s wrong?" he asked as he leaned a little closer so his elbows were resting on his knees.

He stared at me for a few seconds before I answered.

"Ya know, I’m not comfortable with how everyone treats me like I don’t know what’s going on. I know that things aren’t all fun and games, but I’m tired of people trying to make things ‘easier’ for me...like I can’t handle it," I said as I stared at the tree’s leaves. "How does anyone know what I can handle but me?"

He obviously didn’t know how to react to that and I didn’t want to hear his answer. He sat there silent for a few minutes and I got tired of the silence so I stood up and walked down the hall.

"Don’t bother following me either," I hollered back to him. "You won’t find me."

I passed by Nick, Damian, Preston (male dancer aka Pres), Red (Kristin), and Dee (Cassidy) sitting in the hall along the wall. They were sitting next to the table that was setup and covered with the food that the caterer had dropped off. I stopped for a few seconds at the table and picked up a few handfuls of green grapes. I munched on a few as I turned my head to look in the direction where I had come from. AJ was walking my way so I turned back the other way and walked down the hall, munching the last grapes that were in my hand. When I came to the door at the end of the hall, I turned around and leaned up against it as I watched everyone having fun.

"ARTI!!!!!" I hollered as loud as I could.

I knew she was sitting in the hall talking to Kevin so she had to have heard me.

"ARTI!"

This time she looked up and saw me way down at the other end of the long hallway.

"COME HERE FOR A SEC!" I hollered to her.

When she jogged up to me, I grabbed her hand and pulled her outside with me. She gave me a weird look as I led her to the gate that surrounded the building’s lot.

"I need you to let me back in when I come back," I explained before I walked out the gate and watched it lock behind me. "Be back in a few."

She gave me a puzzled look as I ran down the street. I normally don’t run very often, but when I feel like I need to burn off some anger, I run for as long as I can stand it. Arti was still standing there inside the gate when I passed her by the first time.

"One more," I called out as I ran past her and continued down the street.

I ran around the block twice before I stopped and Arti let me back in.

"Feeling better?" she asked.

"No."

She looked at me like I was crazy before we started walking back to the doors of the building.

"I still feel like crap except now I feel like really tired crap," I said with a small smile.

She laughed at my silliness as she pulled the door open and held it for me. Kev was watching her when we walked in and he was about to say something smart-alecky so I didn’t give him the chance.

"She was with me so don’t bite her head off," I snapped before I walked off, leaving Arti behind.

I could tell he was giving me a questioning look as I walked away, but I didn’t really care at that point. I walked past the guys and girls sitting in the hallway and went into the dance room. Fatima was done for the moment so a few of the dancers had the radio on again. ‘Candy’ by Mandy Moore was blaring from the speakers as Red, Dee, BoBo, Damian, Howie, Meg, and AJ danced to the music in the middle of the floor. Pres was sitting down leaning up against one of the walls by himself so I walked over to him and sat down.

"Hey," I said as he looked at me for a split second before he turned his eyes back to the group of dancing people in the middle.

"Hi," he replied as he watched Howie and Meg goofing off as usual.

"How come you’re not dancing with ‘em?" I asked.

He looked at me again, but this time he gave me a little smile.

"I’m waitin’ for a call," he replied as he held up his cell phone.

"Oh...I see," I replied as I stood back up. "Well, I won’t bother you anymore then."

I waved at him a little before I walked to the other side of the room. Someone’s bag was sitting against the wall so I sat down by and laid down so my head was sitting on it. It was rather comfortable, being that it was probably filled with clothes, so I closed my eyes and listened to the music that came from the stereo.

Meg walked over to me after a few minutes and crouched down to talk to me. I opened my eyes and saw her beside me so I gave her a smile.

"Did you get some food?" she asked with a smile.

I shook my head. I’d had a few grapes, but that was hardly enough for a meal.

"I’m going to get you something," she said as she stood up. "Be right back."

I closed my eyes after she walked away. It was a few more minutes before she came back with a plate that had a turkey sandwich, some baby carrots with ranch dip, a few bunches of broccoli, and half an apple that was cut into slices on it. She set the plate down next to me and then shook my arm a little to let me know she was back.

"Eat up," she told me before she went back to the crazy people in the middle of the room to find Curly.

I sat up and picked up a carrot and munched on it for a few seconds before I noticed that I was being watched. When I looked up and locked eyes with AJ, I picked up the plate and turned around to face the wall. I never really like people to watch me while I ate and it was no different when it came to him. I’m fine when we’re both eating at the same time, but when someone just sits and stares at me while I’m eating I can’t stand it. I ate most of the sandwich and munched on the broccoli as I listened to people laughing every once in a while. Arti and Kev had now joined in on the fun. By the time I was done eating, I had finished most of the food on the plate so I set it aside and laid back down on my side. I must’ve fallen asleep ‘cause the next time I opened my eyes, the room was a lot quieter than it was before and instead of music, I could hear people talking in hushed voices.

"You’re awake," AJ said when I rolled over and stared at the ceiling. "Guess you weren’t kidding when you said you were tired."

I didn’t say anything. I looked into his face from where he was sitting next to me on the floor. He had a small smile on his face, but I could see the concern in his eyes.

"You slept through our rehearsal...with the music blaring and all," he explained a little further.

I rubbed my forehead a little as I sat up and let my eyes adjust to the light of the room. I gave him a smile as I sat there still waking up. I felt better now that I at least got a little bit of sleep, even if it was only an hour long.

"Did Nick tell you about what happened last night?" I asked AJ with a straight face.

He nodded slowly as he looked me in the eyes.

"What happens in the dreams?" he asked in a soft voice.

"I don’t think you want to know," I replied with a small sigh. "One of these days I’ll tell you, but now is not the time."

"Ok."

I felt horrible at how I’d talked to him earlier so I decided to make it better.

"I’m sorry for being kinda grouchy earlier," I said as I reached out and patted his hand a few times.

"No. I understand where you were coming from," he replied as he held my hand in his.

We sat there in silence for a few minutes until everyone started leaving. AJ helped me up and we walked out the door hand in hand.

~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~ Nick ~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~

"Aaron...be quiet," I loudly whispered to him from the driver’s seat of my truck.

We were driving back to my place and Liz was sleeping in the front seat. She seemed dead tired after last night and I didn’t blame her. ‘Man...she looks so cute when she’s sleeping’ I thought to myself as I stole a glance at her when we were at a red light. Mom had already gone home so I was driving AC and Liz home after rehearsals ended a little bit early. When we pulled into my driveway, I put the truck into park and then turned the engine off. Liz was still asleep so I got out and went around to her side and opened the door. I gently picked her up and carried her upstairs to her room. I laid her on the neatly made bed and covered her with a spare blanket before I walked out and shut the door behind me. ‘Poor girl. Hope she sleeps ok tonight’ I thought to myself before AC ran past me to his room, probably to play a video game.