Clutching a towel, Hannah sank onto the edge of the unmade bed and chewed her thumbnail thoughtfully. She had given in to him too quickly and she knew it. Nick seemed to be in denial about it, but Cassie was still going to be an issue. An issue. Hannah cringed, ashamed to have reduced Nick's wife, a woman who had done nothing but love the wrong man, to an issue.
Sighing as she stood up, Hannah moved towards the window. She was ashamed of herself a lot lately. She was ashamed of her naivety when she thought back to the heady days of falling in love. She still struggled to comprehend how Nick had hidden his wife, his job, his entire identity from her for so long. Long enough for her to fall in love with him and fall pregnant with Jack. She was ashamed for having forgiven him so quickly, for wanting - more than anything - for them to be a family. For thinking of Cassie as an issue.
Frowning as a sleek black car pulled into the driveway and slowed to a halt behind Nick’s rented Explorer, Hannah pushed to window open and leaned on the sill. About to call out to Nick, his name caught in her throat as two men stepped out of the car.
“Oh, God...” she breathed.
Standing beside the Audi, Howie watched and waited as Nick and Brian eyed each other. Nobody had said a word but the look on Brian’s face spoke volumes. Shifting his weight from one foot to the other, Howie cleared his throat and took a step forward.
“Nick...”
Brian took a step towards Nick and Howie stopped speaking.
“Where’s Hannah?” Brian asked.
“Showering,” Nick replied shortly. “What are you doing here?”
“I could ask you the same thing.”
Nick looked from Brian to Jack and back again.
“I’m getting to know my son,” he replied. “What’s your excuse?”
The flash of anger in Brian’s eyes was obvious from as far back as the car and Howie cleared his throat again.
“We came to talk to you about Cassie,” he said evenly. “We know you filed divorce papers, Nick.”
Staring at Brian, Nick swallowed and shifted Jack’s weight from one hip to the other.
“My marriage is none of your business,” he said through gritted teeth before he turned to sit Jack on the grass. “If you’ve come all the way up here to stage some sort of intervention... you’re wasting your time. I already signed the papers and I know Cassie’s not going to contest it.”
“You don’t know shit,” Brian snapped, clenching his fists and setting his jaw.
The small movements didn’t escape Nick.
“What... You want to hit me, Brian?" he asked, his eyes widening. "You think you might throw a punch?"
Brian took another step forward and Howie followed.
"Guys... Clam down," he said, his hand on Brian's shoulder. "Both of you."
Brian stepped away from him and eyed Nick.
"You mailed her divorce papers without so much as a phone call? Are you really that spineless?" he asked incredulously. "Are you really that selfish?"
Nick sighed and looked down as he ran his hand through his hair. Jack sat at his feet, oblivious to the angry tones as he pushed his dump truck through the grass.
"Look, Brian, I'm glad you care about me enough to come all this way to kick my ass," Nick replied. "That really says a lot. But I was planning on bringing my ass back to LA. You could've just waited."
Something inside Brian seemed to give out, his fists and jaw relaxing as Nick spoke.
"Yeah, well... Waiting would’ve been a waste of time. And time is a luxury we don't all have," he said, his shoulders slumping.
Nick arched an eyebrow.
"What's that supposed to mean?" he asked, turning to Howie when no reply came from Brian. "What the hell is he talking about, Howie?"
"Nick... Maybe you want to sit down or something..."
"I'm fine," Nick replied, his arms folded across his chest and his brow furrowed.
Howie sighed.
"Cassie has cancer, Nick. She has leukaemia...”
The weight of the words slammed Nick in the chest and he inhaled sharply. Howie continued talking but Nick would never know what he said in those moments on the lawn of the cottage at Rocky Point. The world around him grew blurred, his senses dulled as his mind raced.
Cancer? Cassie? Strong, fiercely independent, ‘Don’t give me that shit, Nickolas,’ Cassie?
Howie was still speaking and, through the haze, Brian was staring him down. Nick’s stomach churned. His mouth was dry and cottony and his temples pounded.
“When... When did she find out?” he stuttered.
“Two days before the divorce papers arrived,” Howie replied hesitantly, looking sideways at Brian.
Two days before... Oh, God. Two days before I dropped the divorce bomb on her.
“And what... I’m sorry, I need to sit down...”
Staggering back towards the porch steps, Nick sank onto the wooden slats and drew a hand over his face.
“What happens now?” he finished.
Crouched beside Jack, Howie picked up the yellow dump truck and spun the front wheels with the palm of his hand.
“She’s going to hospital for a chest x-ray and bone marrow biopsy tomorrow afternoon,” he replied. “Then she’ll be admitted for chemotherapy.”
Chemotherapy. They’re going to pump her full of chemicals.
“Why do they need to admit her? Can’t they just give her pills?”
“She needs an IV line,” Howie replied.
She hates needles. She’ll throw up if they stick a line in her arm.
Brian, still standing in the middle of the lawn, watched as Nick leaned back, his elbows on the porch.
“You need to come home, Nick,” he said quietly. “She needs you.”
She needs me? Of course she needs me. She’s sick. And terrified of needles. But I’m divorcing her. I don’t love her. And Hannah... I promised her, not one night apart.
“I’m divorcing her, Brian,” he replied. “I don’t... I can’t just pack up and leave Jack and Hannah.”
“You mean like you just packed up and left your wife?”
“That was different.”
“Oh, really?” Brian asked. “How was that different, Nick?”
“I love Hannah,” Nick retorted as he got to his feet. “I don’t love Cassie anymore. I’m sorry if that pisses you off, but I haven’t loved her for a long time. What do you want me to say, Brian?”
Jack began to grizzle and Howie handed back the truck and stood up, positioning himself as discreetly as possible between his friends.
“I don’t want you to say anything,” Brian replied flatly. “What I want is for you to get your useless ass on a plane home and be her friend if you’re so fucking sure you can’t be her husband.”
Taken aback by the language, Nick eyed his friend warily. Brian stared back at him for a long moment before turning towards the car.
“Let’s go, Howie. We’re done here.”
Howie bent to ruffle Jack’s hair and nodded to Nick before following Brian across the lawn. Opening his door, Brian hesitated. Crossing the lawn again, he stood in front of Nick and spoke quietly as he jabbed a finger in his friend’s chest.
“If I have to come back out here... I swear to God, Nick... I’ll kill you.”
Nick swallowed as Brian turned away and Howie started the car. Taking Jack in his arms, Nick watched as the car disappeared down the driveway.
I Still... by kebin
