"That's easy enough, you need to forget all about Trish Nick. She is gone and can never bother you anymore" Howie stood up while saying that. Never sounding more sure of his own words. I knew he would say that but I wasn't sure if it was what I wanted to hear. I looked over to Kevin to get some kind of reaction. He was staring down at my carpet, not saying anything.

"Kev, what do you think?" I asked him placing my hand on his shoulder.

"Think? About what?" He seemed lost.

"You okay Kevin?"

"Yeah...I'm fine, I just have to run to the bathroom real fast" He stood up and darted out of the room. Howie and I just stared after him, neither of us saying a word.

"Nick, this should be a really easy decision for you to make kiddo, why in the world would you want to go see Trish anyway?"

"I don't know D, it's hard to explain" And it was also embarrassing. I mean how do I explain that even though she did all those horrible things to me, I also was grateful for her for saving my life? How do I explain that even though she was a heartless and cruel murderer, I still cared about her? How do I explain that without sounding like an idiot?

"Can I see the note she sent?" I hesitantly handed the small business card over to him. He held it close to his face to get a better look, "When did she give this to you?" I shrugged.

"Maybe she just wants to apologize" I whispered, I sounded naive like how I had when we were young, when I had believed the whole world was on our side. Howie's eyes met mine. They weren't laughable or angry, just concerned. "Is it something you really want to do Nicky?"

"I don't know Howie. I wish I did, but I just don't"

"Well, you have plenty of time to think about it, the pizza is here. Let's go eat" Howie stood up and extended his hand to me, which I took. He pulled me off the couch and to my feet and together we walked into the kitchen.

"Hey Kaos!" AJ said slopping a big piece of greasy pepperoni pizza in his mouth. I nodded at him and sat next to Brian, who greeted me with a friendly nod. "You know, we really must do something about those security guards out there"

"AJ stop..you're going to get grease all over the floor man" I got up and grabbed some paper towels, got on my hands and knees and started to wipe away the pepperoni drippings.

"Easy Nick, when did you get to be so into cleanliness"

"Well, if I got anything on the floor at Trish and Joe's I would.." I stopped talking then. Realizing what I had just said. Remembering what would happen to me. Feeling Joe's hands grab my hair as he would fling me to floor and make me lick up whatever I or he had spilled. Then banging my head so hard against the floor that I would wake the next morning feeling hung over. A hand on my back made me jump, I hit the underside of the table with my head. "Ow, fuck!" I screamed.

I moved out from underneath the table to see them all staring at me again. They looked at me as if I was some pathetic dog. "It's over now" Brian said. I nodded as I went to sit down.

"J, why did you say that about security anyway?" Howie asked now moving next to AJ and peering out the window. "Because they are supposed to be protecting us but what are they doing? Playing cards. Very nice" Howie shook his head at them. "I wonder how much they are getting paid"

"Who knows...who cares. It's not like we need them anymore" Brian said dismissively. I wanted to say something to the effect of yes we do because Joe is still out there and alive, but didn't have the energy to argue.

"So I still can't believe what that bitch did on the stand" AJ said grabbing another piece of pizza but this time placing it on a paper plate.

"She was full of crap!" Brian said sipping on a cup of coffee. I noticed he wasn't eating anything. He gave AJ a nasty look.

"What did she say?" They all looked over to me again as if I was a little whimpering puppy in need of a walk. I don't think I will ever be looked at any other way again. "It's not important" Brian barely grumpled out.

"I'd like to know too" We all found ourselves staring at the doorway that Kevin just entered. The glare his cousin gave him in return was equal to a death glare. He refused to answer so AJ did the job. "When she took the stand she said she was sorry and that she thought she should receive the death penalty" I have to admit I wasn't really expecting that. I thought for sure she would've begged for her life. Pleaded for them not to kill her. What possible reason could she do that? What would she have to gain?

"Nick...you okay?" I looked away from the pizza box into Kevin's concerned gaze.

"Yeah, I'm fine just a bit..well surprised that's all"

"Me too" He answered.

"She knew that they wouldn't listen to her"

"Maybe she felt bad for what she did" Now all eyes were on Kevin as if he had said he loved the devil himself.

"How could you even say that? She isn't sorry for what she did. She enjoyed it"

"Brian, I don't think she enjoyed killing those people, I mean you should have seen her talking about some of their..." My mind struggled to find the right word, but Brian had no trouble, none at all.

"Victims Nick. They were victims"

"Okay..fine. Victims. She loved them Brian"

"Yeah she loved them, enough to KILL them. Nick you are talking nonsense. You don't know what you're saying"

"Maybe he does" Once again all eyes went to Kevin, "Maybe she loved those kids so much but she loved her brother more. She had to do what was right for him not for the others. She had to protect herself and her family"

"What?" Brian looked like he was ready to jump across the table and strangle his cousin.

"I'm just saying, maybe she had no choice. He was evil Brian. He could have snapped her neck without even trying, Nick even said Trish pushed him down the flight of stairs didn't she Nick?" I was confused about so many things. Kevin was acting strange but he was making sense and verbalizing all I was trying to say.

"Yeah, at least that is what she told me"

"So it's clear that she tried to help Nick by killing Joe. It just didn't work"

"I think you have all lost your minds!" Brian said standing up in a huff and charging out of the room. I felt bad, like I had disappointed him in some way. I wish that I could hate Trish as much as Brian did. I wanted to.

"Maybe it would do him some good to go see her" AJ said, now he had given up on his pizza and sat with cigarette in his hand as he spoke. Taking a quick breath before each puff.

"How do you figure that?" Howie asked eyeing me as if I was a child and couldn't quite follow the conversation they were having.

"Maybe he needs to see for himself that he is safe and she is gone forever. Maybe he needs her to say she's sorry"

"Yeah, or maybe she will just play another mind game with him"

"What do you think?" I asked Kevin, who throughout the whole conversation remained as quiet as a church mouse. Occasionally taking a sip of Coke or taking a bit of pizza. I knew he had a set opinion on what I should do. Actually, I was hoping he would.

"I don't have an answer for you Nick, I'm just going to say..." He paused forever. It was like he forgot he was speaking. Then after taking a deep breath and drawing his hands to his head, he continued, "It's your choice. You need to do what you think is right. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise, now if you'll excuse me I have to make an important phone call" Kevin stood up very quickly, his napkin falling to the floor, as he set out of the room to make his call.

"Wonder what is going on with him" AJ said not bothering to look at anyone but the place where Kevin had been.

"Maybe he and Kris are having troubles"

"Maybe" Howie stopped mid thought and walked back over to me, "SO? What are you going to do?"

Wasn't that the million dollar question? I wish the answer could have been a simple one.

Sliding in and out of the shadows they looked like serpents. Joe couldn't help but smile at that little analogy. A den of serpents. From where he was sitting he had an impeccable view of the house. He was able to see every little move of all the boys. Kevin was facing him for most of the time. The look of desperation on his face made Joe almost laugh out loud. In fact he did once. More for the other patrolling security then for the actual humor of the situation. Although the situation was humorous.

He adjusted in his seat. He knew he was in for an uncomfortable night but it was all part of the job, afterall how many of these kinds of nights did he have when he was paid to guard their lives? Too many to count. Nights of doing nothing but sitting in a crowded car telling dirty jokes to the other guys to see who would laugh first. He always won that contest. He never failed with an old woman walks into a bar jokes. They were his stand by.

"So, an old woman walks into a bar and says where can I find a talking frog?" Joe laughed out loud again, just thinking of the punch line, but was instantly angered when his company didn't laugh along.

"Well, do you guys have no sense of humor?" He asked slapping one upside the head. He fell onto the horn of the car. Sending an annoying beep through the quiet night air. He quickly pulled the guys head off the steering wheel and waved to the concerned person looking out the window. Happy to see Howie wave back.

"Oh that's right, I forgot...dead men can't speak" Joe placed the dead guard's head against the window as if he was asleep. Stupid security guards, so busy playing cards that they hardly noticed him. He was in the car and strangling one before the other hardly had time to react. The one at the steering wheel was hard to kill. He had to stab him about five times in the heart. This car would be a mess to clean up. Luckily Joe wouldn't have to do it.

He noticed Kevin stand up to leave the room and once again found himself smiling. Things were going to work out just fine. He thought to himself, wondering if they realized it would be their last supper together. He grabbed his pair of binoculars to try his hardest to see Kevin. He just had to see the reaction. The one he knew would come.

Forgive me Father for I have sinned. I almost condemned a man to die... Was all I could say over and over in my head while listening to Nick prattle on about what he should do. It would have been so easy for me to just say "Nick go see Trish" As a matter of fact, I was certain that Nick wanted to hear those words. I just couldn't bring himself to do it though.

I stopped just shy of the phone when I heard the car out front honking. My heart stopped. I walked over to the draped window to see what the problem was but the man waved, probably just hit it by mistake. I wasn't sure what to do right up until the time I said do what you feel is right. Up until then I was certain I would tell him to go to see Trish. When I saw in those blue eyes the years of trust and guidance we shared, I just couldn't steer him wrong.

I knew Joe had to see what my answer was, he had cameras everywhere. So I had to call Kristin before it was too late. I had to tell her I loved her and to pack a bag. We would be leaving somewhere. Location to be figured out later, but for now she would just have to go. Leave, go to your friends house anywhere but home. Don't ask me questions baby, we don't have time for that. Just run. He picked up the phone and started to dial his number, when he heard what came from the other end, his hands went numb. So numb in fact that he dropped the phone. No other thoughts made their way to his brain just then, nothing came except his little prayer.

Forgive me Father for I have sinned.