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"Mina!? You still here!?" Howie hollered when he entered the house.

"Yeah, I'm here." Mina came out from the bedroom into the living room wiping her eyes.

Howie walked towards her with a creased brow worried, confused, and sad, "Mina, what's wrong? You've been crying."

Mina wrapped her arms around Howie's waist allowing him to hold her in his arms, "I'm tired Howie, I wish all this confusion would just disappear."

"Come on let's sit down." Howie walked with her to the couch in the living room. The two sat down, Mina sniffled and Howie grabbed her the tissues. "Here."

Mina took the Kleenex "Howie, what should I do? Should I just give Nick a chance even though my heart has doubts?.. Go back to Alex?.. Or better yet just tell them both to go to hell and leave me alone?"

Howie cleared his throat, he really didn't know what to say to all her questions. He wasn't quite sure if she even wanted answers. "I don't know Mina. Can I ask you something?"

"Of course." she wiped her nose as she waited for Howie to ask his question.

He took a deep breath not quite sure if he should really get in the middle of this love battle. Howie licked his lips while running a hand through his brown curly hair, took another breath before speaking. "I've been curious for a long time. And it's really none of my business."

"What's none of your business Howie?" she wish he'd just come out and say what he needed to say.

"Why did you break it off with Alex?"

She looked at him for awhile, not mad that he asked, but really didn't have an answer. She's been wondering the same thing. "For a lot of reasons."

"Like?" he wasn't letting her off easy.

"I got scared, I felt like my life was slipping away. I no longer was Mina. You know? And I was falling so hard for him... It hurt Howie?"

"You broke up with him because you were so in love with him?" Howie was even more confused.

"In a way yes. I was 18 Howie. AJ's ready for these feelings, I'm not. I don't understand them, all I know is it scares me so much. Sometimes I get so angry for not having my mom around to talk to her about these things. I have no one to talk to, to tell me why I have certain feelings. Maybe I was stupid for breaking it off with Alex. God knows I've stayed up late at night trying to figure out what the hell I'm doing. But, I was more confused with him than I am without him."

"Mina, you're now making me confused. I think the answer to a lot of your questions right now is..." he paused before finishing "You need to talk to Alex."

"About What?" She asked completely confused.

"About those feelings. Maybe you won't be so confused. If anything you might just have some closure." Howie raised his brow while biting his lower lip, Hoping he was right.

Mina sat back against the couch, her head rest against the pillow cushion. Staring up at the ceiling "Maybe he's right. I do need to talk to Alex. But what if Alex takes this conversation too personal. I don't want to hurt him anymore than I already have. And if I do feel I should be with Nick, how is Nick going to feel at the end of all this? I have put him on a rollercoaster." Mina sighed, "I guess I should call Alex." she reached for the cordless phone that rested on the end table.

As she dialed Howie got up off the couch and stepped outside. He sat on the porch to give Mina some peace.

As the phone rang Mina swallowed still not sure this was the right thing to do right now. The ringing stopped "Richardson Garage. If you can break it we can fix it." he laughed.

"AJ?" Mina smiled at his silly way of answering the phone.

"Hey Mina, what's up? You need to talk to Kevin?"

"Um no, actually.. I could use some of your time if it's okay. You think you can meet me up at our old spot?"

"Uh, yeah, sure. I'll head there now." Alex was a little weary of why now of all time she needed to see him in what use to be the only place they felt was theirs. A place they haven't visited together in a long time.

"Thanks AJ." Mina hung up the phone. Grabbed her car keys and stepped out of the house finding Howie.

"Hey, I didn't realize you were still here." Mina smiled.

"I'll always be here." Howie looked up at her with his chestnut eyes.

"I'm going to meet up with Alex. And talk like you suggested." Mina started to fidget. Her nerves already getting to her.

"I think that's a good idea. And if you need to talk afterward, you know where to find me." He gave her a slight smile.

"Thanks." She waved before getting into her car and speeding off.

*****

Alex parked his car at the bottom of the hill, he didn't get out of his car right away. He looked at the path that broke in between the green tree's.

~Flashback begins~

"Where are you taking me?" Mina asked nervous as she followed Alex up a hill that seemed to be in the middle of a forest.

"You'll see." He smiled looking over his shoulder as he kept walking.

"I guess it's too late to ask if you plan on chopping me up into little pieces and burying me out in the woods right?" She chuckled.

Alex stopped and turned to look at her, staring her down, "Don't ruin my plans. I wouldn't chop I'd saw." Alex's eyes got all evil.

Mina's eyes got big, and then softened when Alex began to laugh, "Mina, girl, sometimes you are too easy to freak out. I promise there will be no chopping, hacking, sawing of your body. Unless you are into that sort of thing."

"Right Alex, I ask all my boyfriends to bring on lots of pain." Mina shook her head as she continued to follow Alex, now noticing they were no longer going up the hill it was declining.

"We're almost there."

"Good because I'm tired of this hill." Mina huffed.

"It's worth it trust me." Alex smiled once again. He let go of her hand just as the tree's expanded and she was no longer in a forest, but at a beautiful lake.

"Wow, how'd you find this place?" Mina asked as she took in her surroundings.

"My dad took my brother and I fishing here a long, long time ago. Now I just come here to get some quiet time and think. I thought you'd like it here." He smiled at her.

Mina looked up at Alex and smiled back, "I love it here." She wrapped her arms around AJ as he did the same to her.

"There could be no other place as perfect." She released her grasp of Alex and looked out across the lake again, surrounded by trees, rocks, and most important peace and quiet. All you hear is mother nature.

"Consider this our place. No more sneaking around the house. No more noise from home. Just you, me and mother nature."

"You know sometimes, I think you are too perfect." Mina gave Alex a kiss.

~Flashback Ends~


"Thanks for meeting me here AJ." Mina startled Alex who still sat in his car.

"Oh, no problem. You want to go to the lake or just talk here?" He asked from his car.

"I haven't seen the lake in a long time. Let's walk together." she opened his car door, as he began to roll up the window, then shut the engine off.

"Let's walk." He held out his hand for hers. She put her hand in his and they began the walk the two haven't taken together for far longer than it should be.

"Why did you ask me to meet you here Mina?"

"Because it's long over due for us to really talk. With no interruptions, no escape, if it takes till morning, then that's what it takes."

"What takes? What do you need to talk about?" his brow creased.

"Honestly I'm not sure. I know things need to be said, and questions need to be answered. And I owe you this conversation." she stopped as she exited the tree's. And gasped at the sight "My God, I forgot how beautiful this place was."

Alex looked out across the lake, not able to smile just yet. He stepped away from Mina finding a spot on a smooth topped rock to make himself comfortable for what could be a really long night. Mina looked over her shoulder at Alex then back out at the view "I'm sorry Alex."

****

Kevin, Kristi, Brian and Nick walked into the Richardson home to find Howie sitting in the living room quietly.

"Dude, what are you doing? You look like a zombie. Wait! Did you get attacked by the pod people?" Brian cracked.

"No, no pod people. I'm just thinking. Ya'll call it a early day?" Howie asked seeing that it was only two in the afternoon.

"Well since everyone was splitting I figured not much would get done." Kevin sat down followed with Kristi sitting in his lap.

"Is Mina here?" Nick asked still standing in the middle of the room.

Howie looked up at him "Um, no.. She had to go somewhere."

"Where'd she have to go?" Brian being nosey.

Howie looked at him with a scowl. "Some place."

"Oh well in that case. It MUST be important. Cause everytime I need to go somewhere I always go to that Some place."

"Brian what are you talking about?" Howie's forehead got wrinkled in question.

"You know that place?" Brian still looking completely serious.

Howie shakes his head and brushes off Brian. "I'm going to take a drive." Howie got up off the couch and made his way out the door. Nick looked at him funny, then over at Kevin who was paying no mind, he was too busy making out with Kristi.

"That boy is getting more and more strange." Brian shook his head before turning on the television.

"Yeah you being the King of Strange should know." Kevin cracked in between lip locks.

"Taking a moment to breath are we?" Brian acknowledged Kevin's zing.

Howie mean while got in his car and began to drive, not knowing where to go or why he felt he needed to leave. He just knew he couldn't stay in that house much longer.
"Why is it she is so torn over two guys who do nothing but confuse her and hurt her? I would never hurt her. Can't she see that I'd be there for her no matter what. Support her, love her? Hold her when she's scared, cheer her on when she succeeds, wipe her tears when she's sad, laugh when she gets silly? Why can't she see me? Am I so invisible?"
Howie's thoughts were weighing heavy as he kept driving, now leaving Orlando as he exited I-4 on to the Florida Turnpike.

****

"Sorry? For what? Did I miss something?" Alex questioned.

"You know why, I've been nothing but a bitch towards you. And when I wasn't being a bitch I'm sure I wasn't making things easy for you to figure out. I never meant to hurt you. Or even get things so confusing."

"Mina.." Alex sighed, though Mina didn't allow him to go on.

"No, it's true. I know that I've made things more of a mess then fixing anything. You've asked me before 'Why did I break up with you.' but all those times, I honestly didn't have an answer. I couldn't understand myself why all of a sudden I hated you, and wanted you out of my life. I've never loved someone like you Alex. I've never felt the feelings you gave me. My mind was reeling, and my heart was getting so heavy. I was losing control and had no idea where I was headed."

"You make me sound like I was crack." Alex chuckled.

"I'm serious Alex. Don't make fun." Mina looked hurt.

AJ's smile faded, "Sorry."

"Maybe I'm not making since." Mina sighed as she took a seat on a rock near Alex.

"What exactly ARE you trying to get at Mina?"

"I don't know!" She yelled.

Alex just sat there watching her, not sure if he should say anything. Mina massaged her head trying to release the pounding that started. "I don't know what I'm trying to get at. I have so much to say and yet no words. If that makes any sense."

"Just take your time Mina, I'm not going anywhere."

Mina looked out at the lake once more, closed her eyes and just listened to the sounds that made her calm. Crickets chirping, birds singing, trees moving with the breeze, the water meeting the shore.

"I love you Alex. I love you more now than I did when we first became a couple. You always made me feel like I wasn't alone. You made me laugh when I thought I could never laugh again. You were everything to me. And soon it was as if life was you. THAT is what scared me, I woke up one morning, and you were all that my life was. I had dreams that still needed to be reached and God, I was only 18 and yet I haven't reached half the goals most my age would have. I dropped everything to be with you. I ended up hating myself and then it turned to me hating you. And it's not your fault. AJ, please don't believe it's your fault. I wasn't strong enough to stand alone, and having you there made it easier for me to be okay with Not standing there alone. You get what I'm saying?"

Alex was staring at her "I.. I guess."

Mina sighed "No, I guess it's not easy to understand. I guess what I'm saying is, I can't be with you and be happy unless I'm happy with who I am. I need time to find who I am. And as scared as I am to go out there and be on my own. It has to be done. I can't say I'll be running back into your arms, and I'm not saying it won't happen. All I know is I can't be with you now.."

"What about Nick? You say you want to stand on your own, but you've been dating Nick. How does that work Mina?"

"I haven't been dating Nick. I've been getting to know him. I haven't even been on a real date with him so 'dating' is not what we’re doing. Yeah that's what he wants and sometimes I think it'd be great to be with Nick. He's mysterious and sexy, completely different from any guy I've met before. But, then again I really don't have any feelings other than lust when it comes to him.." Mina looked over at Alex who looked like he would rather be eating nails then hear her talk about Nick. "Alex I'm sorry. I shouldn't tell you those things."

"I asked." He gritted his teeth.

"Yeah but still.."

"Is that all you wanted to say? You just wanted to basically tell me you love me. We broke up because of you not me. And you need time and space but once you’re over that you may want me back?"

"Did I sound that harsh?" Mina asked with an attitude.

"Not exactly."

"If you have something to say Alex just go ahead and say it."

"Alright.. I'm sick and tired of you being Ms. Drama Queen."

"Excuse me?"

"You have become the biggest bitch with ‘I'm the center of the world’ attitude to the point I wonder why I still want you back. You are certainly not the girl I fell in love with. The girl who was strong and did stand on her two feet. I don't know where your head is, but you were never weak Mina. And I'm sorry but I can't believe this is the reason you wanted to break off what we had. If you wanted to just be free don't hide behind some lame excuse that is complete bullshit. I know you better than anyone Mina. Or at least I did. And this past year, you've turned into some girl I don't even want to know. I keep holding on to the girl I loved, but it's obvious she's been gone for a long time."

Mina was shocked, "I never knew you felt this way."

Alex stood up and walked towards the water, He picked up a rock and tossed it across the water, making it skip three times. The two not speaking for a moment. "Just be honest with me Mina. No more lies, if you don't know why then you don't know. But don't start digging down to the point all you come up with is lies."

Mina stared at the back of Alex who still stood in front of the lake. She began to bite her bottom lip. "I honestly don't know what to say. Or what is real. I believe those are the reasons we're no longer together. If they’re not the reasons then, Why aren't we together? Why have I been so miserable and full of so much anger?"

Alex turned to look at her, "Then you need more time to actually find out what's wrong. Because if it's not me as you say. Then it must be deeper. I can handle you being scared of your feelings Mina. But if that's the only reason we’re not together anymore. Then maybe I'm NOT the guy you should be with. Because love is scary. And it can be hard at times. But you should feel you can make it through because you love that person so much, you know that you won't be alone in those feelings and hard times. Because you have each other.."

Mina wiped away a tear, knowing Alex was right, but she still had no peace. The two sat in silence for about twenty minutes before Alex spoke, "I don't think we’re going to find the answers tonight Mina."

"I can't let this go Alex. I need peace of mind."

"Do you really think tonight all the answers will be found? That things will be all worked out in one night?"

"I hope. But I can't find those answers alone Alex." she looked up at him.

"Here's all I can tell you. I love you Mina, I haven't stopped loving you. Every nasty remark you've made, every angered glance you threw. I took to heart and yes it hurt. But it never made my love for you less. Maybe I'm an idiot for hanging on so tight. Hanging on to something that obviously isn't there anymore.. But.."

"It's there Alex. Just keep hanging on for me please?"

Alex looked down at Mina who looked so lost. He wanted to rush over and wrap his arms around her, and kiss her, tell her everything will be fine, that he'll be hers for eternity. But he knew that wouldn't help things.

"I can't promise to hang on forever Mina."