*2 Months Later*

Brian had been in the kitchen cooking when Nick slowly got up from his situated spot on the couch and wobbled into the kitchen. He snuck past Brian and into the freezer to grab some ice cream. Once he opened the door he frowned, his extra chocolate peanut butter chip ice cream was missing.

“Brian!” he whined

Brian turned around, “Nick what are you doing up! You’re suppose to be off your feet”

“I don’t care! Where is my ice cream?”

“You’re not supposed to have any, remember?”

“Tell that to the babies”

“Frack… you’re not suppose to have it”

Nick’s eyes welled up, “You don’t love me!”

“What?”

“You absolutely hate me! You think if I eat the ice cream I’ll be even more fatter”

“Nick… be serious! I don’t think you’re fat at all baby,” he said trying to approach Nick to hug him

Nick slapped his arms away, “Don’t touch me! If you didn’t touch me in the first place I wouldn’t be a whale!”

“But you look wonderful pregnant”

“Ha! You say that now! Wait until I have them then I’ll be all stretch mark saggy galore and saggy breast”

“What the… Nick you don’t even have breast!”

“Says who?” Nick said pulling up his shirt

Brian eyed his chest, “It’s just swelling”

“Breast”

“Swelling”

“Breast”

“It’s a little bit of man boobs”

“Man boobs?” Nick starred, “I’m turning into a woman…” he cried

“But you just called them breast-”

“Don’t correct me!” Nick screamed, “Oh god I’m no longer male… Quick Bri check to see if I still have a penis or did it retract and turn into a vagina?”

“Ok, seriously after all this is over we’re going to therapy”

“Oh so now you think I’m crazy?”

“That’s not what I-”

“That’s what you were implying-” Nick paused, wincing as he grabbed his side, “Ouch”

“Are you alright baby?”

“I’m fine… but I think the babies aren’t,” Nick stated bracing himself against the counter, “I think I’m going into labor…”

“Shit! Ok… deep breathing Brian… remember what they taught you in those classes!,” he said to himself

“Those techniques are for… Ouch! Oh god I think I’m dying!”

“Right, ok! I’ll go upstairs and we’ll go to hospital!”

“Hurry!”

Brian rushed upstairs and grabbed Nick’s hospital bag. He ran into their bedroom throwing things around as he tried to find his keys.

“Ah ha!”

He rushed down the stairs and out the door. Jumping into his jeep he backed out of the driveway.

“We’ll be there soon Nick don’t you worry,” he said turning his head, “Nick? Oh shit I forgot him!”

He hit he break of his car causing traffic behind him to stop. People started to honk their horns as Brian had a mild panic attach in the car. Pulling himself together he turned the car around and headed back to his house.

Nick watched as Brian backed up into the driveway. He stood their hands on his hips in the hallway as Brian rushed through the door. Panting he rushed over to Nick.

“I’m so sorry! Oh my god”

“Whatever can we please go! I think I peed myself… “ Nick cried

Brian froze as he looked at the gigantic puddle underneath Nick’s soaked pants.

“How did your water break?” he questioned his horrified expression never leaving his face

“It’s a fucking miracle! Don’t ask me stupid shit right now!” Nick screamed

“Right”

He quickly stepped around the puddle as he helped Nick to the car. He was trying to remain as calm as possible but the more irritated Nick got the more he began to panic.

“Oh my god… I feel like I need to take the biggest shit of the world,” Nick announced

Brian quickly turned around in his seat, “What the hell?”

“This hurts SO BADLY! It’s like worse than that time I tried to get soda from the machine and the machine fell on me when I was 14!”

“Stay calm, we’re on our way there-”

“CAN YOU DRIVE FASTER!” he screamed

“I’m going as fast as I can!”

Nick outreached for Brian’s arm gripping it tightly, “If you don’t go any faster I will shove Tyke up your ass!”

“So… is 90 a good limit?”

“I don’t care as long as I get to the damn hospital otherwise you’re gonna have to buy a new car!”

Brian pressed his foot on the gas peddle as he began to weave in out of traffic. Once on the highway he picked up his speed trying to focus on the road. All of a sudden flashing lights pulled him out of his focus. He turned around real quickly only to snap back around gripping the wheel.

“Oh my fucking god,” he cursed

“What now?” Nick cried

“The cops are behind us, I’m going to pull-”

Nick gripped his shirt, “If you pull this car over I’m going to push you out the driver’s seat and drive myself!”

“I can’t lead them on a police chase!”

Brian slowed up his speed as he moved his car over onto the shoulder of the highway. He sat there nervously biting his fingernails as Nick continued to moan and groan in the passenger seat. The officer stepped out of his car and made his way over to their vehicle.

“I don’t want to go to jail!” Brian whined

“Who cares about you! I’m in fucking labor!”

Brian smiled nervously, “What seems to be the trouble officer?” he stuttered

The officer tipped his sunglasses down, “Do you know how fast you were going there?” he asked peering into the car looking from Nick to Brian.

“Yes… I’m in a hurry”

“Do you realize that you could’ve caused an accident-”

“Don’t you have a donut to eat?” Nick snapped as he continued to pant

“Nick!” Brian gasped

“Excuse me?” the officer said

“Listen officer he didn’t mean anything by it. We’ve got a huge emergency-”

“Step out of the car”

“What? I just said we have a-”

“If you don’t step out of the car you will be arrested for disorderly conduct”

“Brian if you step out of this car I swear to god!”

“You too tubby get out of the car,” the officer ordered

Tears began to well up in Nick’s eyes, “Tubby? Who the fuck are you calling tubby? If I wasn’t in labor right now I’d kick your fucking-” Brian clamped his hand on his mouth.

The officer stepped aside as Brian slowly got out of the car.

“Put your hands on your head,” he ordered

“Listen officer this is a big misunderstanding”

“Didn’t I tell you to get out of the car!” the officer shouted to Nick

“Brian Thomas Littrell! I cannot take this shit anymore. If you don’t get me to a fucking hospital I will send the holy ghost to get you!”

“Out of the car!”

“Fuck off you piece of shit! I’m fucking pregnant! I am in no way getting out of this fucking car unless we’re in front of a damn hospital!”

“That’s it, you’re both getting booked!”

The officer handcuffed Brian and proceeds to drag him to his car. Grunting Nick shifted around in the car until he was in the drivers side. He saw that Brian had left the keys in the car, ‘God I love that my husband is so trustworthy!’ he said to himself as he started the car.

“Hey!” the officer shouted

“Nick where are you going!” Brian cried as he watched his car take off.

“We’ve got a runner in a white BMW. Blonde fat white male driving headed south,” the officer called in on the radio.

“Oh my god…” Brian prayed.

-------------------------------

AJ flopped down on the couch knocking Howie’s book out of his hand. Leaning over he reached for a bag of chips.

“You could’ve said excuse me!” Howie said

“Nah, you had enough room,” he said shoving chips in his mouth

“Why are you even here? Don’t you have a date tonight or something?”

“Nope, I’m lonely and figured you could use the company. Kevin’s a snooze feast and Brian and Nick are insane in their house”

“And you’re not?”

“I’m not a pregnant dude”

“Whatever”

Howie opened his book and continued to read while AJ surfed through the channels.

“Oh cool Cops is on!” he chimed

“Lovely…”

AJ watched as the helicopter followed a white BMW down the interstate. The car seemed familiar as he sat up so he could lean into the tv.

“Hey D?”

“Yes AJ?”

“Doesn’t Brian drive a white BMW?”

“Why yes Alex, he does”

“Oh”

The silence in the room began to annoy Howie as he closed his book.

“Why?” he asked annoyed

“Because I think Nick is on Cops”

“That’s nice… WHAT!” he said now focusing on the TV

AJ pointed, “That is clearly Brian’s car but Nick is driving it!”

“Oh shit”

“Oh shit is right! Where the hell is he going?”

“Looks like the hospital…”

“OH MY GOD HE’S IN LABOR!” they both shouted in union

Scrambling to their feet the ran around the house looking for their belongings.

“Think we’ll beat him to the hospital?” Howie asked

“They cops are too focused on chasing him, we’ll take the back roads”

“Oh god…”

“To the bat cave!”

-----------------------------------------

“You two are in for a lot of trouble,” the officer said as he continued to driver.

Handcuffed and weeping in the backseat Brian slumped forward in his seat.

“Listen officer you’ve gotta believe us. My husband’s pregnant and we were just trying to get to the hospital!”

“Save it for the judge cause the only place you two pirates are going is jail”

Brian’s eyes widened, “I can’t go to jail! I’m Christian! Jail is no place for me”

“You should’ve thought of that before you little friend when on a speed chase”

“He’s pregnant!”

“Shimmer down with all this pregnant business! There is no such thing as a pregnant man”

“Well prepare to be amazed,” Brian mumbled

Sinking back into his seat he sighed to himself, ‘I hope Nick and the babies are ok,’ he thought to himself.oHH