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I awoke the next morning to the smell of bacon and eggs. I snuggled under the comfort remembering the night before. Kevin and I are having a baby. I placed my hand on my stomach. "Your one lucky little baby"," I whispered, "look who your getting for a daddy."

"And a mommy" his voice brought my eyes to the bedroom door. He was standing with a tray that had breakfast for two and a single white rose in a vase.

"Merry Christmas Darlin" he came to the bed and sat the tray over my lap as I sat up against the headboard.

"Merry Christmas Boo." He leaned in and gave me a kiss then sat down on the bed next to me.

"You joining me?" I asked.

"Yep, if you don't mind?"

"Of course not, this is beautiful, thank you."

"Your welcome, can't have you not starting the day with a good meal, I mean you are carrying my baby." The smile covered his entire face as the words left his mouth.

"Kevin, are you sure your ok with this, I mean I know we didn't plan this and I swear I don't know how it happened..."he placed a finger over my lips.

"Babe, this is the best thing in the world, I couldn't be happier. No, it's not anything we discussed at a serious level, but you know I want kids and I know you want kids, so what's not to be happy about. As far as how it happened, I'd be more than happy to show you how." He wiggled his eyebrows.

"Oh Kevin!" I popped him in the chest.

"Ouch, hey now you better take it easy."
"I'm fine. Can you do me a favor?"
"Anything lil' mama" he smiled.

"Will you get me that bag over there off of the chaise lounge?"
"Sure, what's that?"

"Open it"
"Another gift for me, awe you shouldn't have."
"I didn't, it's for your mother, and I wanted to see if you approved."
Kevin opened the box and looked inside. It was a grandmothers brag book.

"Oh Cass, this is perfect"
"I put a copy of the ultrasound in the first slot" Kevin opened the book. When he looked back up I could see the tears in his eyes."

"Cass, mom will love this, thank you for thinking of her"
"Well, I have the other gift under the tree, but I thought this would be a special way for us to tell her. Not that your smile won't give it away." I giggled.

"Hey, can't a man be happy about making a baby with his beautiful wife."

"Well, I guess, but do you want to tell your mom this way, I mean we don't have to give her that today?"

"No this will be cool and that way Jerald, Tim and Lacey will all be there too along with all the Littrell's everyone can find out at the same time."

We got up and got dressed, we need to get to Mama Ann's for Christmas Dinner.

"MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE" Kevin hollered as we came in the back door.

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom Kev, I'll be right back." I slipped off to the restroom.

"It has begun," He giggled to himself.

"Merry Christmas Baby" Mama Ann came down the stairs. "Where's Cass?"
"Bathroom" Kevin tried not to smile to big; he really wanted to surprise his mom with this news.

Everyone gathered around the table and prepared for dinner. Kevin you wanna do the honors?

"Sure. Dear Lord, thank you so much for sending your son for us and allow us to celebrate his birth on this glorious day. Thank you for bringing us all together this year safely and allowing our family to be here together. Thank you for all the blessings you have given us this past year and for the ones that you will bring to us in the coming year. Lord, Thank you for all the new members to the family. Amen."
"AMEN" Echoed through the room.

"Ahh, Kevin that's so sweet to thank God for Cass at the dinner table." Tim picked at Kevin.

"Uh." Kevin looked at me real quick.

"Well, I do thank God for Cass and besides Leighanne's a new member to the family." Kevin was trying to cover.

"Well, I think it's sweet" Mama Ann spoke up. "Now someone carve that bird."

After dinner we all gathered in the living room to hand out Christmas presents. We had a picture of Our Wedding framed for everyone for Christmas. We were all sitting and talking about Christmas and the plans for new years. "Mama" Kevin stood up.

"Yes son"

"Cass and I have one more gift for you"

"Kevin you and Cass have done to much already" Kevin handed her the box.

"It's not much, just a little something we think you'll enjoy for years to come" Kevin turned and smiled at me. He kneeled by his mom as she slowly lifted the lid off the box carefully removing the tissue paper. "OMG, Kevin, does this mean what I think it means" She looked up at Kevin with tears in her eyes.

"Open to the first page" Kevin's voice began to shake.

"OH KEVIN, CASS" She was on her feet hugging Kevin.

"What in the World Mama?" Tim and Jerald said at the same time.

"Can I?" She looked at Kevin. He just nodded.

"I'm gonna be a GRANDMA" her tears began to fall again.

"OMG" was heard all over the room, Kevin and I were bombarded with questions.

"August 10th"

"Yes I'm fine"

"No not planned but a wonderful surprise" Kevin began to tell about his Christmas present he got last night. His chest puffed out with pride.

"OH CASS" Leigh came over and sat next to me on the couch.

"Leigh, I still don't know how it happened and I was so scared how Kevin would take the news."

"OH, I'm sure he don't care, he was probably thrilled."

"Oh he didn't and he is. He's been so sweet, he even brought me breakfast in bed." We could hear Kevin tell all the guys about his baby.

"Leigh, I'm gonna be big as a house at your wedding, I'm sorry. If you don't want me to be a bridesmaid anymore I completely understand."
"Don't you dare, you're going to be in my wedding and you're going to be beautiful" Leigh hugged me.

"I'm so excited, the first backstreet baby."

"Oh god what will the fans say now." We both burst out laughing. The boys turned to us and gave us a look like we had lost our minds.

"Kevin, you might better call the other 3 brothers and fill them in with the news."
"Yeah Brian, your right."

"Congratulations man I know how bad you've always wanted to be a dad. This is great news."
"Thanks Bri, I just can't believe it. I'm so excited. I mean, it's just so unreal."

"I bet, I'm still dealing with the fact that I'm going to be a married man in 5 months."

Kevin picked up his cell and headed to the back porch.

"Hey bone, Merry Christmas"
"Merry Christmas to you too Train. How's things in the sticks."

"OH great man, great. Look I needed to tell you about a Christmas present that Cass got me. It's so great, I can't wait to tell everyone about it."

"Yeah, what she'd get ya train, a baby grand for that house of yours?" Everyone knew that Kevin wanted a piano for the Cabin.

"Well, she did get me a baby for the cabin, it's just not a piano"
"What, Oh shit!! Are you serious man?"

"Yep, I'm gonna be a dad J"

"Oh Kev, that's so cool. Man I'm really happy for you both."

"Thanks J, well I gotta call the other 2 stooges. So I'll catch New Years Eve. Ok."
"K, tell Cass I said Merry Christmas and Congratulations."
"I will, later bone."

Kevin called Howie next, but decided that him and Cass needed to call Nick and Lisa together. They were inseparable ever since they moved in together.

"Hey Nick, Hey Lisa, Merry Christmas" we both said into the speakerphone.

"Hey guys, Merry Christmas," they said together.

"How it going" Nick said.

"Great, we got something we want to tell you guys and figured we'd catch the two of you today."

"What's up Train?"

"I'm gonna be a daddy" Kevin said

"OH MAN, that's great, CONGRATULATIONS" came from both.

"You ok Cass, I'm so happy for you" Lisa had taken over the phone.

"Yeah, I'm good." Kevin's cell began to ring. It was Nick.

"I can't believe it, When, how long have you known, omg. What did Kevin say?"
"Yeah, I know I was shocked too. I'm due in August, I've known since thanksgiving, but I wanted to tell Kevin first and it made the perfect Christmas present. He is so excited I don't think he's quit smiling yet. He's been talking about the nursery here and the nursery in Florida and how he has to make sure that everything is timed just right so that he will be there when the baby is born. He's so funny."
"Oh Cass, that's great, well guess what?"

"We have to get new carpet in the den?"

"Really, why?"

"Well there's a huge wine stain that will not come out right next to the fireplace.

"What in the world, I told you two not to get to carried away, you and your kinky ways." I was laughing

"Well, I didn't mean to, it's just that Nick took me by surprise."

"I don't want to hear this," I laughed.

"NOT THAT you dope.... Nick asked me to marry him?"
"OMG, are you serious?"
"Yeah, we were spending Christmas eve here at the house a quite night in front of the fireplace beside the Christmas tree. I had gotten up to get us another glass of wine, when I came back in the Nick was on one knee with the ring box opened, I just dropped the glasses. God Cass I'm so happy. I mean when I'm not with him I feel like I can't breath. When I am with him I feel like nothing could ever go wrong. Oh yeah, I said yes."

"You dweeb. I figured you would've. I'm so happy for you. I can't believe he did that. So tell me about the ring?"
"It so beautiful. It's a 3-carat pear cut diamond. I can't believe it. It's so beautiful."

"Oh Lisa...." I was crying.

"Cass you ok?"
"Yeah, hormones, really Lis I'm so happy for you. So any ideas on a date."

"Well, we actually both decided that we don't want a big wedding, we really liked the way that you and Kev did things but we don't want to jump in front of Leigh and Brian and since we officially started dating at the party on the 4th of July we thought that we would like to get married on the 4th of July. What' do you think."
"I think that's wonderful, where you guys thinking about having the wedding?"
"Well, I was going to talk to you about that."
"Nick and I were wondering if you and Kevin would mind us getting married at the cabin by the stream?"
"OH Lisa, are you serious?"

"Yeah, we loved it there and we both knew the night of your wedding that we wanted to be together, so what better place."

"That would be perfect, besides I'll only be a month away from delivering this baby and I'm not sure I would be able to travel anyway. OH Lisa, I'm so happy for you guys, just let me know what you need me to do and I'm there."

"Oh yeah, Cass?"
"Yeah, I'm going on tour with you guys"

‘YES! I won't be alone, Leigh's not going back out this time, says she has to start getting the house ready and finalizing all the plans for the wedding, she said she would fly in for the shows that are close, but she's not staying for the whole tour. This is great; you'll be there to help me with this pregnancy thing. I think Kev might get a little overprotective"

"Ya think?" We both laughed.

"Well, I guess I better go, I see my husband coming back inside, I'll talk to ya later, you guys will be at the New Years party right? "

"Wouldn't miss it, see ya there, Bye"


"OMG" Kevin came thru the front door.

"I know can you believe it?"
"Little Nicky, getting married, by the way he said congratulations"

"Gosh, all the BSB's are growing up. Brian and Nick are getting married...'

"And I'm going to be a daddy" Kevin was lifting me in his arms before I could finish my sentence.

"I think someone needs a nap." He turned and headed towards the bedroom.

"But Kevin, I'm not tired."
"I wasn't talking about you, I was talking about me and I want you next to me." He gently laid me on the bed.

"Oh, well since you put it like that." He lay down and placed his head on my belly.

"Hey baby, it's daddy, Merry Christmas" He began to sing to the baby. The tears welled up in my eyes.

"I want you to know that I'm very excited about you coming and I'm going to make sure that I take extra special care of your mommy so that she don't have to worry about a thing but making sure your safe."

I placed my hand on Kevin's head.

"I love you boo" my voice cracked.

"You ok?" He looked up at me with concern in his eyes.

"Fine, better than fine, I'm wonderful. Kevin I was so scared you would be mad, please don't ever think that I got pregnant on purpose."
"Baby, you gotta stop this. I was a willing participant in the act of creating this baby and I couldn't be happier. This baby was created by the love that we had for each other and apparently that love is stronger than any means of birth control. I'm so excited about this baby; even if we would have planned it I couldn't be happier. Ok" I just shook my head.

"Come here" He wrapped me in his arms. I laid my head on his chest. I loved to hear him breath. I could smell his cologne. God he smelt good. The warmth of his body and the gentle rising and falling of his chest as he breathed began to relax me. I heard Kevin start to sing in almost a whisper.

I'd go anywhere for you Anywhere you asked me to
I'd do anything for you Anything you want me to I'd walk halfway around the world For just one kiss from you Far beyond the call of love The sun, the stars, the moon
As long as your love's there to lead me I won't lose my way believe me
Even through the darkest night you know
I'd go anywhere for you Anywhere you asked me to
I'd do anything for you Anything you want me to
Your love as far as I can see Is all I'm ever gonna need
There's one thing for sure I know it's true
Baby, I'd go anywhere for you

We fell asleep in each other's arms.

December 31, 2001

AJ was throwing a New Years bash at his house and all of us met up there to party and welcome in the New Year. We danced and ate and talked about all the upcoming events. Bri and Leigh's and Nick and Lisa's weddings and of course everyone had to rub the first backstreet baby for luck. At midnight Kevin and I were slow dancing when the chime of the clock struck.

"Happy New Year Mrs. Richardson" He bent down and began to passionately kiss me.

"Happy New Year to you too Mr. Richardson" I said when he broke the kiss. "Care to continue this at home?"

"Hey fellas, Happy New Year. I'm taking the misses home for a private celebration" and with that we were out the door and headed home. When we got home Kevin went to the kitchen to get us something to drink and I told him to meet me in the bathroom. When he came in the door I was sitting in our Jacuzzi with candles lit all over the bathroom and Kenny G's Breathless playing in the CD player. A fire was glowing in the fireplace. Kevin was carrying two champagne glasses filled with orange juice. As he undressed and sank in the water beside me I could feel my heart begin to beat faster. God what this man could do to me.

"Now where were we, oh yeah. Happy New Year darlin" He raised his glass of OJ.

"Happy New Year to you too Boo, this is going to be a great year." I took a sip of the OJ. Kevin took my glass and his and placed it on the side of the tub. He then grabbed me and pulled me onto his lap.

"It sure is darlin, it sure is." His lips crashed on to mine. I'm not sure but I think the water got hotter the longer we stayed in there. We made love all night long and fell asleep in each other's arms.

The next few months went by so fast. The tour was going great and Lisa and I stayed busy planning her and Nicks wedding and helping Leigh plan her and Bri's by phone. The pregnancy was going great. I would fly back to Kentucky once a month for my appointments and everything was perfect. Baby was growing and we were still on schedule. May came and Brian and Leighanne's wedding was perfect, just the fairytale she had dreamed of. True to her word she picked out a dress that hid the small bump that was beginning to form in my belly. Everyone was laughing and crying, especially Brian. Who would've thought he'd be so emotional. They left for Hawaii the day after the wedding; the boys had two weeks off so they were going to fly into New York from Hawaii to pick back up with the tour. Kevin and I spent those two weeks decorating the nursery in the Orlando house. We used multi colored music notes, white oak furniture, since we had decided not to find out the sex of the baby we wanted to make sure it would work for a boy or a girl. The nursery at the cabin was going to be done in a fairytale style; Nick would paint a mural on the baby's wall for us as his gift to the baby.

The tour was set to wrap on our anniversary and then we would head to Kentucky for Nick and Lisa's wedding and then to await the arrival of the baby. The boys knew that they could work on materials for the next album in Kevin's studio at the cabin which insured that Kevin would be there for me if I needed him, but also gave the other boys the excuse to be there when the baby arrived. They were all so excited.

I was sitting in the pit at the last show with Leigh and Lisa. The concert was going great and the boys were giving everything to the fans. Girls were screaming their names and going crazy especially when AJ would thrust his hips. We just laughed. After the intermission Kevin came back on stage dressed in his white suit and hat. God I loved it when he wore that, but where were the other boys." The fans were going crazy yelling and screaming.

"SHHHHH" I saw him put his finger to his lips. The crowd quieted down.

"Ok, so we're gonna do something a little different today if that's ok with all of you?"
The crowd erupted in a loud roar of yes's and Ok's.

"SHHHHH" again his finger to his lip, again silence.

"Well, today is a very special day for me and I'm hoping that you all could help me with a little something?" He paused for a moment.

"Today is my wedding Anniversary..." A collective AWWWW echoed the arena

"And my wife is sitting right down there." He pointed towards me.

Just then Jimmy came over to me.

"Kevin said to bring you up on stage"

"NO" I said.

"I'm not telling him no, you tell him no" Jimmy looked back towards the stage.

"Jimmy, Please, I'm as big as a house?" My eyes pleading with him.

"Oh, Cass you look beautiful, come on Kevin's worked really hard for this."
"Oh Ok. But remind me to kill you both later"

I walked up onto the stage. The audience began to applaud as Kevin led me to a stool in the center of the stage. I caught a glimpse of the other boys coming on stage.

"Kevin, " I whispered.

"Shhh Darlin, I just wanted to tell all these people how much I love you and how happy you made me when you married me one year ago today." His voice echoed thru the arena

"I love you too boo, but I'm the lucky one."

I Promise You began to softly play. Nick's voice cut through the silence as Kevin held out his arm and asked me for a dance.

It's in the silences, the words you never say
I see it in your eyes,
it always starts the same way It seems like everyone we know,
is breaking up Does anybody ever stay together, anymore?
I promise you, from the bottom of my heart
I will love you till death do us part
I promise you as a lover and a friend
I will love you like I never love again
With everything I am ooh I see you look at me,
when you think I'm not aware
You're searching for clues,
of just how deep my feelings are.
How do you prove the sky is blue, the oceans wide?
All I know is how I feel,
when I look into your eyes

I promise you,
from the bottom of my heart
I will love you till death do us part
I promise you as a lover and a friend
I will love you like I never love again
With everything that I am ooh yeah

Oh there are no guarantees That's what you always say to me
But late at night I feel the tremble in your touch
Oh what I'm trying to say to you,
I never said to anyone I Promise

I promise you,
from the bottom of my heart
I will love you till death do us part
(I do my darling I promise you)
I promise you as a lover and a friend
I will love you like I never love again

With everything I am I promise you,
from the bottom of my heart
I will love you till death do us part
( I love you I love you I love you I love you)
I promise you as a lover and a friend
I will love you like I never love again
With everything I am
You're everything I am oh yeah
With everything I am

By the end of the song I was in tears and so was Kevin. He knelt and pulled a long stem white rose from inside his jacket pocket and pulled me close so that he could rest his head on my belly.

The audience went wild. He stood up and placed a gentle kiss on my lips before placing his hand on my belly and turning towards the audience.

"I"M GONNA BE A DADDY" he yelled and the crowd got crazy as The Answer to Our Lives began. Kevin escorted me to the side of the stage kissed me and turned to go back to the center; he turned around quickly. I could read his lips.

"Tonight baby, you and me".

My whole body began to tingle as I went back to my seat.

That night we made love like we did on the night we got married, he was so gentle and caring. He fell asleep holding me close to him. I lay there awake watching him sleep; I could feel the baby moving underneath Kevin's hands.

"How did I get so lucky?" I whispered as I moved his hair out of his face.

"You loved me Cass, you just loved me." He whispered.