The next few days between Brian and Alexa were spent in a sexual splendor. They stayed in, talked about nothing at all and everything all at once, and made love until the sun rose the next morning. Both Brian and Alexa were elated simply to be back in each other's arms. The world around them seemed to stop. For that little while, all of the pain of the world and the injustices that they had suffered slipped away. Inside that house, all that they needed was each other.
Early Saturday morning, Alexa and Brian awoke to banging coming from the story below. Alexa sat up in bed. “What’s that?”
“Are you expecting someone?” Brian asked curiously.
“No.” Alexa replied as she jumped out of bed and ran to the door.
“Where are you going?” Brian asked pulling her back into her bedroom with a smirk. “What have I told you about going on crusades in your underwear? In fact, you shouldn't be crusading at all.”
Alexa shot Brian a look and grabbed her robe from where it hung in the bathroom. “I've taken care of myself for a long time. I can take care of some suburban burglars.”
She rushed out of the room with Brian at her heels. When Alexa got to the top of the staircase, she peeked down and saw that it was only the movers lifting the furniture. “Whoa, whoa!” She called as she descended the stairs. “What are you doing?”
Two of the men picked up a large bookcase and started out the door; a third man walked over to Alexa. “Apologies, Ma'am, no one was supposed to be here.”
“It's okay, but can you please put my furniture back? I canceled the move. I'm here until the end of the month.” Alexa replied as the mover stared at her blankly. “I called your office.”
“Well, Ma'am, the landlord called us back and asked us to get you out of here by the end of the weekend. A Mr. Ben S-”
“Sawyer!” Alexa interrupted. “Ben Sawyer. That's my boss.”
“That's not what it says here.” The sweaty mover shrugged and held out the yellow order receipt.
She shook her head and pushed it back at him. “You've just got the wrong name.”
“What does your boss have to do with anything?” Brian piped up from behind. Inside, he was terrified that this meant that she might actually have to leave after all.
Alexa turned to Brian. “I tried to tell you. The company that I work for, or that I used to work for, owns this house. We kind of had a falling out and this is their way of telling me to clean my desk.”
“Is that even legal?” Brian asked, dumbfounded.
“If they're paying for it, it's absolutely legal.” Alexa shrugged and looked around the emptying house. “I guess that I'm going to have to find a hotel to stay at or something.”
“You can't stay in a hotel forever.” Brian replied with his arms crossed against his chest.
“I know.” She shook her head. “I guess we're going to have to do some talking about how much you like long distance relationships.”
“Do you mind that I excuse myself?” The mover interrupted. “We have a lot of work to do.”
“By all means, go.” Alexa replied, rolling her eyes. She then turned back to Brian. “I really need to go upstairs and get my things back together. Luckily, I only have that one suitcase that I unpacked.”
Alexa turned and jogged up the stairs before Brian had a chance to respond. She was on the verge of tears. Finally, everything was going well in her life. She was in love with an amazing guy whom said that he was in love with her, too. It was all so new and now she had to leave it.
Once upstairs, Alexa started to throw her clothes into her large, dark green suitcase. “This is unbelievable,” she muttered to herself.
“So, what happened?” Brian asked as he leaned against her oak dresser. “I mean, between you and your company?”
Alexa shook her head. “Nothing. I mean, we just didn't see eye to eye on a lot of things.”
“Like?” Brian prodded, hoping that she could possibly just go back to them. Only that wasn't very fair considering that he wasn't willing to go back to the Backstreet Boys for anything.
“Like things, Brian.” Alexa shrugged. “Mostly ethical things.” She turned around to look back at him and saw the sadness in his eyes.
Brian knew that she wasn't going to have the house forever. They had talked about that much, but he figured that they had a couple of weeks until she had to make a major decision regarding what her next move was going to be. He had hoped that she'd decide to find work in Atlanta and stay close to him. When it came to his love life, Brian realized, he was unbelievably selfish.
“Look,” Alexa broke into his thoughts. She walked over and wrapped her arms around his waist. “I'm going to get a hotel room somewhere in town and I'm going to stay as long as I can. After that, we'll see what happens, but just because I'm physically not here, doesn't mean that things have to change, right?”
Brian sighed. “I did the long distance thing for years. I don't want to do it anymore.”
Alexa sighed and rolled her eyes. “Here we go. What does that mean?”
Brian laughed and pulled her to him. “Why are you getting all grouchy?”
“Because you're about to say something ridiculous.” Alexa shrugged. “But that's okay. Go on. Let's hear it.”
Brian laughed again. “I wasn’t going to say anything ridiculous. I was just going to say that you should stay with me.”
Alexa shook her head and pulled away from Brian. “Well, not what I thought that you were going to say, but yep, still ridiculous.”
Brian pulled Alexa back as she started to walk away. “What's so ridiculous about it? You don't have to stay forever. Just as long as you’re comfortable, or until you get sick of me whichever comes first.” Brian smiled and kissed Alexa softly.
“Do you seriously hear yourself, Brian?” Alexa asked, softly. “We haven't even been to your house since we officially got together. The first time that we attempted this,” she paused as she pointed back and forth between the both of them, “you freaked out and I didn't see you for two weeks. Let alone the fact that I know that you have never had a woman other than your wife in that bed with you. I have a feeling that it would destroy you and I'm sorry, but I'm not in the mood to make myself into a nuclear weapon on your life.”
“Alexa,” Brian replied calmly with a smile. “Beautiful. It's fine. I’m done talking myself into feeling badly about things. I’m moving on to a new chapter and I’m bringing you with me. Just stay until after the holidays. At that point, we can start making some real plans. It’ll be an extended vacation. Let’s just enjoy this honeymoon period as long as we can.”
Alexa sighed and began to falter. Though during the last few days and during the time that they spent together in Kentucky they were by each other's sides all day and night anyway, the thought of making it official, even if only for a few weeks was a little exciting. “Are you 100 percent, absolutely sure?”
“I am 100 percent, absolutely sure.” Brian pulled her close and kissed her forehead lightly. “We've been staying here together anyway. It's just a change of venue.”
Alexa sighed and hoped to God that he was right.
-------
Brian left Alexa's former house a few minutes later. He needed to prepare, both mentally and organizationally. Alexa had only been up to his room one other time and that was when she dragged him out of bed on Hayden's birthday. Did he really know what he was getting himself into? Was it still going to be like that? Was she still going to have to drag him out of bed on those occasions?
Brian unlocked his front door and walked inside. The place was still a mess from when he went on his violent tirade. There was broken glass on the floor from his coffee table. Holes were smashed into the wall from when he went on attacked against the artwork that once hung there. Man, was he going to have some explaining to do.
Brian walked into the kitchen and grabbed the broom and dustpan. He then walked back into the living room and began to sweep the mess, hoping that he could get a good bit cleaned up before Alexa made her way across the street. Apparently, he had been hoping for too much. Alexa walked in just as he was bending down to lift the first full dust pan.
Alexa’s mouth hung slightly open as she first came upon the mess that he’d made of his house. Not only had he destroyed the living room, but the place was a pig sty. He left empty pizza boxes and fast food wrappers lying around aimlessly. Books from the overturned bookcase were lying in piles on the floor. Alexa blinked, hoping that she was only seeing things. “What the hell happened?”
Brian looked down embarrassed and shrugged. “I was kind of messed up.”
“Like on drugs?” Alexa joked with a bewildered expression plastered onto her face. “Because it seriously looks like you were on something when you did all of this.”
Brian rolled his eyes. “No, not on drugs.”
“I’m not trying to be judgmental or anything,” Alexa replied, “but please tell me what the hell happened here and if I am in any way a part of that, do me a favor and leave that out.”
Brian laughed softly and walked over to Alexa. He took her hands into his gently. “Listen, I told you that when we got back from Kentucky I was really conflicted, right? Well, I kind of took my frustration out on the house,” he shrugged nonchalantly, but then added quickly, “listen, it’s no big deal. I just need to clean up and it’ll be as good as new.”
“It’s no big deal?” Alexa argued, hating the fact that she was so hurt by the way that he had felt when they had arrived home from Thanksgiving. She understood that he needed that time, but it still didn’t make seeing the visual of his pain any easier. Suddenly she noticed his tattered wedding picture lying on the floor at his feet. “Brian, you were so guilt-stricken about being with me that you ruined your home. You couldn’t even be bothered to clean up after yourself. Now you want me to stay here?” She shook her head and thrust the photograph at him. “No way.”
Brian grabbed onto Alexa as she started to walk away. “You’re not leaving here, Aly. I was in a bad place and I did something stupid, but I thought that I’d made it perfectly clear when I ran across the street proclaiming my feelings for you that I had finally let that guilty part of me go.”
“You did. I mean, you tried.” She shook her head. “But Brian, let’s not fool ourselves into thinking that every day is going to be a good one. You’re still going to wish that I was her sometimes.”
Brian shook his head emphatically. “No. I’ve never wished that you were Hayden. Ever. And I’m not going to. You’re different and that’s what I love about you. You don’t try to be Hayden. You don’t try to take Hayden’s place. You’ve etched out your own permanent place in my heart and yeah, I destroyed this place, but not because of you. It was all about me not having realized that it was okay to feel the way that I do about you.”
Alexa shrugged. “I guess that I just want to know that this part of you--this sad, maniacal part of you--is gone, at least for now. I know that there are days that are going to be hard on you and I get that. I just don’t want to be bounced back and forth every couple of weeks between I love Alexa, no wait, I have a wife.”
Brian cupped Alexa’s face in his hands and looked into her eyes. “I promise you that for the most part, that part of me is gone. You just have to trust me. Okay?”
Of course she could trust him. At least he had everything out on the table. Alexa sighed and nodded. She intertwined her fingers with Brian’s, which were still resting gently on her face, and kissed him softly. “I do trust you. It was just easier to forget about all of this when it’s not staring you in the face.”
“I’m a firm believer in actions speaking louder than words,” Brian replied after a brief pause. He smiled softly. “And I’m going to show you that I’m not as fragile as you think that I am.”
“I don’t think that you’re fragile.” Alexa replied with a smile and rolled eyes. “Look, can we just clean this mess up and move on?”
Brian laughed. “Absolutely.”
Within a couple of hours, Brian and Alexa had cleaned Brian’s house from top to bottom. When they finished at Brian’s, their next task was to grab Alexa’s things from her house across the street. They stacked her boxes in Brian’s garage and dragged her suitcases upstairs to his bedroom.
By the time that Brian lugged the last suitcase into his large closet, he was exhausted. He walked back into the bedroom, where Alexa was standing in the doorway, and flopped back onto his pillow-topped mattress. He patted the mattress next to him and smiled. “I think that it’s time for a nap.”
Alexa grinned and rolled her eyes. “Oh, come on, B. Lit. A little hard work and you’re ready to call it a day?”
Brian narrowed his eyes in confusion. “B. Lit?”
“Yeah, that’s your gangsta name.” Alexa said laughingly.
“I don’t recall pulling out any of my gangsta moves recently, but okay.” Brian shook his head and patted the bed again. “Would you just come here?”
Alexa walked over to Brian slowly and sat down.
Brian leaned over and kissed the top of her shoulder softly. “What’s the matter? You seem nervous or something.”
Alexa shrugged. “I am kind of. I’ve never actually shared living space with a guy before.”
“Come here.” Brian said as he reached around and pulled her down next to him. When she smiled up at him coolly, Brian melted and kissed her passionately, then smirked. “Will you stop being so nervous if I promise to be gentle?”
Alexa laughed and pushed him away. “You’re unbelievable.”
“That’s what she said.” Brian replied laughingly as he pulled Alexa on top of him and they christened his once lonely bed.
-----
The next morning, Alexa awoke to the sound of the phone buzzing beside her. She smiled as she became acclimated to where she had woken up and whose arms were wrapped around her.
“Hello?” She answered groggily.
“Well, hello to you, too.” A male voice replied with a hint of a smile.
Alexa pulled the phone away from her ear, not knowing to whom she was speaking. Then she noticed that it was Brian’s phone that she had answered. The caller was Brian’s fellow Backstreet Boy, AJ. “Oh, I’m sorry. I thought-”
“No, Sweetheart, it’s all right. I’m actually really glad to be talking to you.” AJ replied. So Brian actually took my advice for once, he thought to himself.
Brian stirred in the bed next to Alexa. “Who are you talking to?” He asked sleepily.
“I’m sorry,” Alexa replied handing him the phone. “It’s actually for you.”
Brian looked at the caller ID and smiled to himself. He knew that it was probably an honest mistake, but now he had AJ to deal with. “Hello?”
“Man, I thought that you two forgot about me.” AJ laughed. “Notice how I said you TWO, right?”
Brian laughed and shook his head. “What do you want?”
“Well. Now, I want to talk about that pretty little thing that I’m assuming is in your bed.” AJ replied with a smirk. Across the country in California, it was only 7 a.m., but AJ had already been up for an hour. He knew that Brian, however, was not an early riser.
“What else do you want?” Brian replied as he chuckled to himself and sat up in bed, leaning against the headboard.
“Well you’re awfully private over there considering that just last week you were talking about how you’d taken her to bed again and again and again.” AJ paused. “Wait. This is the same girl right?”
Brian rolled his eyes and then smiled as Alexa laid her head in his lap. He played with her hair idly as he talked to his friend. “Of course it is.”
“Good,” AJ replied. “You know, I know that you’re trying not to talk about it, but I’m glad that you decided to take my advice for once.”
Brian shook his head. “I didn’t, but okay. So, did you call me for some specific reason this morning?”
“Two reasons actually. For starters, I wanted to let you know that your mom invited me over for Christmas, so I wanted to know what day you were going up there, so that I could meet you. Secondly-”
Brian cut AJ off playfully. “Why are you always talkin’ to my Mama?”
“Well, your mom called to ask me if I’d heard from you. So maybe if you called her more often, she wouldn’t have to call me.” AJ laughed raspily. “What? Do you not want me there?”
“I didn’t say that.” Brian replied, smiling.
“Then shut-up.” AJ joked. “What I was going to say next if I hadn’t been so rudely interrupted was that we had a meeting with management yesterday.”
Brian rolled his eyes, though he continued to smile. “And?”
“And, they said that they’re firing us all if you don’t come back.”
Brian was silent for a moment not knowing if he was kidding or not. “Seriously?”
“No.” AJ deadpanned. “But I bet you were thinking about coming back for a second.”
Brian rolled his eyes. “You’re ridiculous. So, what did they really say?”
“They had some initial tour dates for us. I guess that we’re going to do a mini-tour to promote the new album and to say ‘hey, we’re back.’” AJ replied. “And, we’re going to be in Atlanta sometime in late January. I wanted to make sure that you would show up.”
Brian sighed. “I don’t know, Man. I’ll have to think about it.” Brian doubted that he’d be there. The truth was, he was afraid if he went to the concert that he’d miss it, which is probably what AJ and the others had hoped for.
“I’ll take that. I’m going to remind you over and over until the actual date. You’ll be there and you’ll bring the girlfriend with you.” AJ smiled, glad that Brian hadn’t turned down his invitation right off the bat.
“We’ll see.” Brian said with a grin, and then hurried to get off of the phone so that AJ wouldn’t pressure him for an answer now. “Speaking of the girl, I’ve got to feed her, so I need to let you go.”
“All right, well I’ll see you in a couple of weeks then?” AJ replied. He was looking forward to seeing Brian. They hadn’t spent any time together in over a year. Even then, Brian hadn't really been himself.
“Definitely. I’ll talk to you later.”
AJ said goodbye and then Brian hung up the phone. He smiled down at Alexa. “So, did you enjoy talking to AJ?”
“We didn’t really talk.” She replied, smiling. “I’m sorry. I didn’t realize that I was answering your phone.”
“It’s okay.” He replied, still running his hands through her hair. “He knew all about you already anyway.”
“Do I want to know?” Alexa replied. She rolled around and looked up at Brian.
Brian shrugged. “I didn’t tell him anything that you don’t already know or haven’t already heard.”
Alexa nodded and smiled. “So, did I hear you mention food?”
“You definitely did. Are you hungry?”
“Famished.” She replied dramatically.
“Then get up and let’s go get something to eat.” Brian smiled as Alexa sat up and kissed him softly. He sat back and watched as she jumped off of the bed and walked over to the closet to sort through her suitcases to find something to wear. Brian sighed contentedly. For the first time in over five years, he was completely happy.
