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"Measure of A Man"
written by Sara (goneplatinum@live.com)
Two-Thousand and Eight
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“What the fuck? What the fuck?!”

Nick let the kitchen door slam shut behind him. He tossed his keys on the counter, his mind still reeling from the random conversation that had taken place not even twenty minutes before.

“Nick! What the fuck is this?” Jill all but screamed.

“What the fuck is what?” Nick shouted back, furthering into the house. They met with matching scowls.

Jill thrust the cordless phone in his hands. “You have a message.”

“The hell is wrong with you?” Hoping for a more reasonable explanation, Nick punched in the security code and listened as the automated voice came through. “So? It’s just some girl.” And without hearing the entire thing, he hit the ‘off’ button and tossed the phone out of reach.

“Some girl? Some girl? Why the fuck is some girl leaving a message on our phone?” Jill shrieked, her voice going up an octave with each spoken word. She waved her hands around in frustration. “I don’t understand this! How did she get our number? Why is she calling you?”

“Jilly, baby, please. Calm down. I-it’s not what you think.” In spite of himself, a small laugh escaped his lips.

“Oh really? So tell me then, what is it? I mean if it’s not what I think, surely there must be a good reason. Come on, Nick, I want to hear.”

He shook his head, scratching the back of his neck as he glanced into her piercing blue eyes. “I-I must have met her on tour or something. How’d she get my number? I don’t know… the internet gives you all the information you fucking need.”

“Seriously? You seriously met this girl on tour? Yeah, I’m about to believe that one.” Jill began pacing back and forth between the living room and kitchen, all the while wringing her hands and mumbling under her breath.

Nick scoffed. “Whatever. Believe what you want.”

“Nick, grow the fuck up already.  This is the real world. You have real responsibilities. You have…” She trailed off as a sob became lodged in her throat, tears threatening to fall. Nick took a step in her direction, but she shook her head and pushed him away.

“Jilly, come on… you can’t honestly think that… come on, you know I love you.”

“Do I? Do I know that? Sometimes I’m not so sure.” Tears cascaded down her porcelain cheeks. She hastily wiped at her eyes as her head began to pound with such force she thought it would implode.  “I can’t do this anymore,” she managed to say, her voice almost a whisper.

“Fuck…” Nick gripped his hands together, his knuckles turning white. “Fine. Those girls? They mean nothing to me. Nothing, okay?” He wanted to punch something or someone and punch it hard. “You are the one I come home to. Not them, you. And that… shit, that means a lot.”

“I can’t keep competing with them,” Jill said, her voice wavering.  She slumped down in the overstuffed recliner. “And you know what? I shouldn’t have to feel like I am.”

“But baby, you’re not.”

“I-I want to believe you. You’ve never lied to me before… “

“Right, so why the hell would I start now?” He crouched down in front of her and ran his thumb down the side of her face. “Jilly, baby, look.  I love you, okay? I love you. So please, don’t worry about anyone else who may or has come along, because you’re the only one who matters.”

A shrill ringing interrupted the moment. Nick cursed and stood to retrieve the phone. “Hello? Oh, uh, hey... No, it’s fine…” He glanced back at Jill and gave a small smile. “Huh? I’m good. Yeah, okay. Yeah, bye.”

“Let me guess…” Jill wiped her hands down the front of her pants and rose to her feet, her quasi-good mood thrown away. “Another slut--oops, I mean girl?” Nick met her gaze and immediately drew his eyes down to the floor, biting his lip as he tried to find some way out. “I knew it.”

“Jilly, it’s not what you…”

She cut him off with a swipe of her hand. “How the hell can you tell me that when I saw it with my own two eyes? I was right here, Nick.  I should’ve known. You’ll never change.” With that said Jill walked briskly over to the front closet, threw it open and pulled out her suit jacket and purse. Her head continued to pound in her ears, but right then the emotional pain trumped the physical.

“Jilly, where are you… what the fuck? So that’s it, you’re just gonna leave?”

Jill sighed and tossed her hands up in frustration. “What other choice do I have?  The trust I thought we had is out the window at this point. I can’t put my trust and confidence in someone who picks up random numbers and women on the fucking street and then blatantly lies to my face trying to cover it up.”

“This has all been totally misconstrued. I-I won’t answer the phone anymore, okay? I won’t. Just please, baby…. Please don’t go.”

Jill rolled her eyes and let out a short snicker. “Nick, come on, that may just be the stupidest thing you’ve ever said.”

“Stop talking to me like I’m a little kid!” Nick shouted, clenching his hands down on the hem of his shirt.

“Then stop acting like an asshole,” Jill said, her lips pursed into a straight line.

Nick drew back, the words hitting him like a gunshot at point blank. Stunned into silence for a few seconds, Nick opened his mouth but nothing came.

“Get out,” he finally managed to say at almost a whisper.

Jill opened the front door; she gave a quick look back at his ashen appearance. Taking a mental inventory of the face that she had loved--and thought had loved her in return--for three years, and slammed the heavy oak door shut.

With a thud, Nick collapsed down on to the recliner, his mind numb and void of all comprehension.