“Hey girl!” Sarah said to me giving me a hug. “Who’s car is that?” She asked.
“Oh, it’s Howie’s.”
“Is he here?” I shook my head.
“No, his friend came and picked him up, they’re at the studio.” She looked at me funny.
“Was he here?”
“Uh, yeah how do you think his car got here?” We both laughed. She shut the door.
“Do you want to get something to eat?”
“Uh, yeah sure why not? Just let me get my purse.” She said ok and I went into the room AJ was in, which happened to be mine. He starred at me.
“What am I supposed to do?” He whispered. I grabbed my purse off my bed.
“Leave when I leave…well after you see we’re gone.” I went to go back out the door and he stopped me.
“When can I see you again?”
“Whenever you want to…” I gave him a kiss on the cheek and he grabbed me and pulled me closer to him.
“I want to see you now…” He pulled me into one of the more romantic kisses I had ever shared with him. He let me go and I was just a little pulled back. I laughed.
“Wow.”
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that. You’re not with me, I’m sorry.”
“That didn’t stop you when we first met.”
“Mary!” I heard Sarah walking down the hall, and neither of us moved. “Oh…” She walked into the room and stood next to me. “Mary, why did you lie to me?” She asked me and I shook my head to come back down to earth.
“I didn’t know how you’d feel about it. I still don’t know how I feel about it.” I looked at AJ kind of funny.
“What’s going on here? You look so…not you.” She looked at AJ. “What did you do?”
“I didn’t do shit but follow my heart…Mary knows that.” He nodded at me. I was still in shock. I hadn’t spoken to AJ in so long, how could this be where I am right now?
“Mary, I’m going to leave, you guys need to talk ok?” I looked at her and she hugged me. “You really need to talk to him ok?” She whispered to me and I sighed a little and agreed. She left and AJ and I walked back out into my living room and I sat on my couch and he sat on the other side of it.
“I shouldn’t have kissed you, I’m sorry.”
“Alex…” I caught myself and we both looked at each other. “AJ, sorry.”
“No, you can call me Alex…” He tilted his head back. “It’s not like you haven’t earned the right to.”
“Ok, Alex.” He brought his head back up. “I don’t know why you would feel compelled to kiss me, but I’m still really confused about you.”
“Like I’m not?”
“About what?”
“Me, what I want to do. Better yet what I should do…” I scooted closer to him.
“You should focus on you…Don’t worry about the trends, and the people around you anymore. That’s what got you so messed up in the first place.” He put his arm around me and I put my feet on the couch and leaned against him. I could hear him and feel him breathing. He’s been so close to death before, through ODing and what not. To not have him around would be really upsetting to me. That’s why I left him, I wouldn’t be able to watch him do that.
“Sarah, she used to do drugs with me…”
“Why?” I looked up at him.
“Because I told her if she loved me she would…Sarah is really easy to break. That’s why she hates me, because she knows I know.” He started playing with my hair and I got butterflies in my stomach.
“Oh…I like her…”
“Probably, she is really nice. I did love her at one point, but when I got sober and she told me it was over since I cheated, I wasn’t really all that hurt. I was hurt when you left me.”
“I had to.”
“I know, that’s what sucked. Because you felt you had no other choice, and I was mad that there weren’t any more reasons for you to stay with me.”
“No, there were tons of reasons for me to stay, but none of them made sense.” He laughed and continued to play with my hair. “Alex…”
“What?”
“Why did you come to me in the store?” He thought for a minute.
“I needed to know if you still love me, like I still love you.”
“You can’t unlove someone, Alex. You were my first real boyfriend that I went all the way with and spent years with. My life was you…” I sat up and put my legs over his and hugged him. Feeling his arms around me was an amazing thing. “I wish we could be 17 again…”
“Me too, babe. Me too.” He kissed the side of my head and I put my hand on his face and smiled at him and kissed him. I opened my eyes for a second and looking at his face, I knew he was serious about me this time. It read over his face. I felt his hand run through my hair and hold onto my neck. I sat on his lap still kissing him. I felt him smile as we kissed. I put both my hands on his face and then took his shirt off. His body was still as gorgeous as the day we met, maybe even better. He took my shirt off and then my bra and put me on the couch and crawled on top of me. He sat up and took my pants off and then his own, soon we were both naked. He got back on me and kissed me again. “I love you…” He whispered before he entered me. Those three words only made sense coming from his mouth. Not from a friend or family member did it make sense. Only Alex had me feel them. Alex and I got up and ran to my bedroom for more comfort. I rolled over onto him and I looked down at him and his eyes were closed and his face read comfort. He bit his lower lip and it drove me crazy. I went back to kissing him and then kissed his body and then I got to his penis and put it in my mouth. I rubbed it with my hand at the same time and his hand touched my head and he still gently ruffed it up a bit. I rode him again. “Baby, I’m going to explode.” And I let him do that in me for the first time in a long time. He held me tight as he did. It felt so good to have him, to know I could have him and get him. “God, I love you…” He said rolling me back over to work me for 2 more amazing hours.
Author's Chapter Notes:
There is another sex scene towards the end, that's a warning...
