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AJ’s POV

“What? Baby, are you sure?"

I glanced over at Brian as he talks to his wife. I frowned when I saw the surprise and shocked look on Brian's face. Brian held up his right hand, he was telling me to wait. I nodded and continued reading the materials on my hand. Brian talked to Leighanne for a couple more minutes, he was already sitting beside me when he said goodbye to his wife. I looked at him waiting for the news he was going to tell.

"Pizza will be here in a few minutes." Brian said. His voice sounded as optimistic as he could make it.

"Great! I'm starving." Nick answered without looking at Brian, he continued writing his ideas for the next song they were going to write.

I raised my eyebrow. I knew that was not what Brian wanted to say. I could see it in his eyes, he wanted to say something.

"Leighanne met the boy at the diner again, he was in the pizza parlor, too." Brian started when he realized I was waiting for him to say something. He was studying my reaction and I have no idea why. "His name is Alexis and he was with his mother."

"Good. Did she apologized for making up that story about us and his son?" I asked as I picked up the pen from my lap and motioned to Nick to give me a piece of paper. I was hoping that was all he wanted to say.

"No." Brian stopped to see my reaction again, it was driving me crazy.

I started to write my new ideas on the paper but I was still listening to Brian. I looked at him when I realized he stopped talking. I smiled at him, encouraging him to go on. Brian took a deep breath.

"Alex, Alexis mother is...Rachel." Brian spoke the words carefully.

I froze for a moment, I felt like I'd just been hit in the stomach. I opened my mouth and tried to speak. But my mouth went dry as I pressed my lips together. I simply stared at Brian in shock, and then buried my face on my hands. I felt Nick and Howie’s presence, they were now standing in front of me with a concerned look on their faces. I looked at Brian again and I could see he was hurting for me, too.

"Rachel?... She's here?... How..." I trailed off.

I was so shocked I didn’t know what to ask, and I wasn't even sure how much I wanted to know. Knowing that she's here in the same town was too much to handle. And now she has a son who thinks I could be his father, it confused me more. It has been four years but I was still hurting like it was yesterday. I should be very excited because after four long damn years, I found her again. But all I could feel now was pain, something was not right.

I stood up, excused myself and went out. Brian tried to follow me but I heard Nick stopped him and told him to leave me alone. I silently thanked Nick. I went on the convenience store across the street. I noticed the surprised look on the face of the cashier when I entered the store but I ignored it. I picked up a pack of cigarette and two bottles of beer, I stared at the bottles for a moment. I know I shouldn't be buying any alcoholic beverages, and I have no plans of drinking them. I just felt like these could take the pain away and I could get some strength just by holding them. I stopped halfway through the counter, I closed my eyes hard and tried not to think about her but everything reminds me of her even the damn bottles on my hand.

I can't even remember when was the last time I touched a bottle of beer or any alcoholic beverages for that matter. She was the reason I am six years sober now. She helped me get through the darkest time of my life. When I went to rehab, she visited me almost everyday, she was always there to support me, she never left my side. If it weren't for her I might have been still drinking five bottles of beer a night or a bottle of hard liquor, and maybe partying until four in the morning everyday. I changed for her.

Even when we broke up four years ago, or did we really broke up? As far as I can remember I woke up one morning, finally having the courage to ask her if she could be his wife, if she wanted to spend the rest of her life with me because I was so sure I wanted to grow old with her, but she was gone. I loved her so damn much, I loved her more than anyone, even more than my life. I was even willing to give up my solo career just to be with her. I would have kneeled and begged each and every BSB fan to accept her, if necessary. But she was gone! All she left was a note saying "Don't look for me. I need time and space."

Then I found out she already resigned as the assistant of the backstreet boys' tour accountant. But of course I can't just let her go, I looked for her, I went to every place where she could possibly be. I was so desperate I could have asked the fans to help me look for her.

"Excuse me, are you going to buy those?"

It took a moment before I realized that the cashier was talking to me. I handed the items to her and took out money from my wallet.

"You're Alex Mclean, aren't you?” The woman asked again in a low voice.

I stared at the woman for a while, nodded and smiled. Jen must be wrong in thinking that no one could recognize us here. But it doesn’t matter to him, this woman must be a fan and I knew what will happen next. She would ask for an autograph or maybe a picture of them together. I love the backstreet fans, they were the best fans in the whole world. I would do everything to make this woman happy even if I am not in the mood and actually hurting right now.

The woman smiled and gave me the items I bought plus my change. I was waiting for her to ask for an autograph or whatever but she didn't. Instead she said something that shocked the hell out of me.

"Welcome home Alex! Alexis must be very happy. Hope you'll stay here for good"

To say I was shocked was an understatement. Things were getting more and more confusing. I wanted to ask the woman what the hell she meant by what she said. Or maybe she could repeat what she said because I don’t think I got it right. But she was already attending to the woman behind me. I tried to smile and walked away.

And to make matters worse, I heard the woman behind me asked the cashier if I was Alex McLean. Upon hearing my name, I stopped walking and listened for a while. They were talking about Alexis and Rachel being happy at last. I heard them say that it was about time for me to come back. I went out of the convenience store very confused. I immediately crossed the street, I cannot wait to be home and talk to someone sane enough to tell me what the hell was going on.

I saw Brian waiting for me at the porch.

"You're better than that." Brian gestured towards the bottles I was holding

"I know." I shrugged "Have no plans of drinking them, I just felt like I should buy them."

I put the bottles in the table and turned to Brian "Damn it, Brian, I don't know what the hell is happening in this town. First, Rachel lives in this town and she has a son who thinks I could be his father. And you know what, Rok? There are two women in that store." I pointed the store across the street while my other hand was massaging my nape. "They know who I am, they know my name and you what they said? Welcome home Alex, Alexis must be very happy.'" I imitated the way the cashier said it to me.

"Really?" Brian couldn't believe it either "J, you think you are Alexis' father?"

"I don't fucking know, Bri." I shook my head and lit one cigarette "I have to do something."

"What are you going to do?" Brian asked

"I have to see Rachel." Was my best answer

"How?"

"I'll go to the pizza parlor, they might know where she lives."

"Hey," Brian tapped my shoulder "Why don't you sleep on it bro, and see her tomorrow morning? You have a bad temper now."

"You think so?" I asked him in a low voice

Brian nodded "And I'll research where you can find her."

Brian pointed to the two bottles in the table "Better get rid of those before Nick sees them" He said laughing

I laughed and put the bottles in the trash can before I went inside the house. Maybe Brian was right and I needed to rest now and deal with everything tomorrow.