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Chapter 5.

When Jess hung up the phone after talking to Tara she walked out to her garage. She had on a pair of sunglasses to hide her puffy eyes. She hadn’t slept much that night. All she had been thinking of was Nick and what he said the night before.

“Hi Charles.” She said to the door man.
“Taking the car out today Miss Forrester?”
“Yes. I’m going to visit my parents.”
“That’s nice.”
“I don’t know about that, but I need to get out of town for a few days.” She walked by him and got in her car.

As she drove off her mind went back to yesterday. She’d seen the shock on Nick’s face when she told him Jennifer was dead. But she still couldn’t believe that he didn’t know. If he didn’t know that would mean that Jennifer lied to her about Nick leaving.

“Jennifer would never lie to me,” she said to herself. “He’s nothing but a fcuking liar.” How could he been telling the truth? She’d seen the hurt look on her sister’s face when she told Jess that Nick had left.
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Flashback

“What do you mean he left”? Jessica said with a confused look.
“He’s left. What don’t you understand? We’re not together anymore.” Jennifer answered as she stared out the window with tears falling down her face.
“Jenn, I’m so sorry, I can’t believe he did this to you. What an ass!” She couldn’t believe it. How could he leave her sister like this? She needed his support to get trough her desease.
“Don’t cry Jenn, he’s not worth it,” she said and held her sister who was crying her heart out.
“I love him so Jess…”
“Don’t talk, try to sleep. You need to save up energy for tomorrow.” She thought about Jenn’s first treatment tomorrow and she was terrified. She needed her sister. This had to go away. She didn’t wanna live without Jennifer.
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She felt the old anger bubbling inside of her again as she drove home to her parents. The more she thought about it the more she was convinced that Nick was lying. She’d seen her sister after the break up.
If she broke it off then why had she been so upset? But the hurt in Nick’s face last night seemed so real. She was confused.
“Jenn, if only you were here. I don’t know what to do,” she said, wishing she had her sister right next to her.

Within an hour she was home. She stood on the driveway, watching her old home when she saw her mother in the window.

“O boy,” she thought. “Here it goes.”
“Jessica, you’re here.” Her mother came out and gave her a hug.
“Yeah, I figured I could stay until Monday.”
“Come inside honey. It’s cold out.”

They stepped into the house and old memories of her and Jennifer growing up hit her. Her mother hadn’t changed a thing anywhere. The house looked just like it always had.

"Jess, put your bags in your room and come down for dinner. It will be ready in half an hour,” her mother said and walked into the kitchen. “Your father’s sleeping but he’ll be up for dinner.”

Jess walked up the stairs to put her bags away and stopped for a second as she passed Jennifer’s old room. The door was closed but she knew it looked just the same as when Jenn died. She knew she would go in there later to talk to Jenn but she wasn’t ready yet. She hadn’t been in there since she died but with everything that happened the last couple of weeks she felt like she had to go in there to be close to Jenn.

She walked into her own room and sat down on the bed. She turned on her cellphone and saw two new messages. One was from Ryan wishing her a nice weekend at her parents, the other one was from Tara and she didn’t like what she heard.

“Hi, Jess. Listen I know you’re not gonna be happy about this but Nick called. He wants to talk, sounds really upset. What if he’s actually telling the truth?”

“I don’t believe it. How can Tara believe him?” she thought and slammed the phone shut. She decided to go into Jenn’s room before dinner. She needed to feel her presence, even if she knew she wasn’t there. She slowly opened the door and went inside. Suddenly she felt like she was 21 again, sitting by her sister’s bed watching her toss and turn in her sleep. That had been the last time she talked to her before she died.
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Flashback

Jessica sat by her sister’s bed watching her. She had a high fever and they all knew she wasn’t gonna live much longer. But Jenn didn’t wanna spend her last time at a hospital, so she had a nurse taking care of her at home. Jess took a sponge and gently washed her face.
“Nick…I need you…come back, I’m sorry,” Jenn whispered in her sleep and tears fell down her cheeks. Jessica’s heart ached for her.
“Damn you Nick, for hurting her when she needed you the most, I’ll never forgive you for this,” she thought and wiped away her sister’s tears. Jennifer woke up and looked right at Jessica and grabbed her hand.

“I love you Jessica. Be happy. Tell mum and dad I’ll miss them.” She closed her eyes again and drifted away. Her hand let go of Jessica’s.
“Jenn don’t leave me.” Jessica looked at her in panic. She wasn’t answering her. “Mum, Dad help me,” she screamed as she desperately shook her sister trying to wake her up. They both came running but there was nothing they could do. Jenn was dead.

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“Don’t think about that,” she said to herself as she wiped a tear away.

“Hi Jenn. I’m home. Not for long though, I wouldn’t stand it. Everytime mum looks at me she sees you. And I can’t stand the sorrow in her eyes.”

She sat down on the bed and suddenly heard something falling down to the floor. She reached down under the bed to see what it was, and found a book.
"What’s this?" she said to herself and picked the book up from the floor. She opened it and took a deep breath. Inside it small text filled the pages with Jennifer’s familiar handwriting.

“My God, it’s Jenn’s diary. I didn’t know she had one.” Before she had the time to read any of it her mother called for her to come down and eat. She quickly sneaked into her own room first, hiding the diary under her pillow. She didn’t wanna tell anyone about it before she had the chance to read it.