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Now I know what you’re thinking at this moment…what a bastard and stupid idiot I am for allowing Josie to seduce me. Because that’s what she did at the end. But what you don’t understand is just how much I punished myself for allowing her to kiss me. I was naïve and stupid to think that she actually only wanted to be my friend.

Honestly though I never had a problem before, usually it’s AJ or Nick who have trouble with these sorts of things not me. I guess you can say I had never experienced such things. I mean yeah some fans would tell me they love me and may have insinuated themselves upon me but I would then leave to the next town. So there was never a problem for me to solve. Yet Josie she was clever she played the friend card good.

The worst of it all is she had become really close with my own wife. How could I explain it to Leighanne? How would I ask her to stop talking to her? Not only that Baylee seemed to get closer to her as the tour advanced. I was in turmoil and what was worse AJ had become so distant from me…he hated me. I knew he knew more than he led on, he caught me kissing Josie once after the pool incident. A kiss I did not start, I swear.

Josie became my nightmare; she threatened to ruin my career by going to the press about our relationship. One that we never had…I never had sex with her I want to make that clear. We made out yes but it was only because I had no choice, I was scared of loosing my family and most of all the respect of my own son. What was my son going to think about me? What was AJ thinking of me…

See after AJ got out of Rehab he came to me and we had a brother to brother talk. He admitted to me that he admired me for my devotion to my family and my beliefs. I was so proud myself that I told him I would be there for him always for advice. Now look where I am at? He knew what was going on and I knew that he hadn't said anything because he was expecting me too. But how long was he going to keep it?

Josie was intoxicating and I’m not going to say that we never came close to sleeping together because we did a few times, but I couldn’t do it. I loved Leighanne I still do. But the more I tried to distance myself from her the more Leighanne invited her around. It was unbearable especially because every time Leighanne wasn’t seeing Josie was all over me.

She made me do things against my will, like lie to Leighanne to go see her. I was getting restless yet I still did not have the nerve to come clean…I was ashamed. That’s when AJ started to show me that he was becoming very impatient with my actions. How?

Well one day on rehearsal in Philadelphia he began to sing the song Poster Girl and what was worse the other guys followed his suit. I could’ve killed him with the look I was giving him when I had to join in… what was worse he didn’t sing Jodie… he said Josie on purpose…

[Flashback]

“Hello ladies…how’s everyone doing?” AJ asked the fans that were at the rehearsal. He smiled as the screams were heard. “Now usually this where we ask you what song you want to hear…but today I have a better idea. How about we each chose a song to sing?” he turned to look at the other three men.

“That’s sounds like a plan,” Howie said as he sat on the stool.

“Yeah it sounds good to me too,” Nick said as he walked on the stage getting a lot of screams. “Hi Ladies,” he smiled to them.

“I know your cool too B-rock right? Ok well I will go first… hmmm. It’s hard I have a few favorites,” AJ said as he pretended to think. “Oh I know…Poster Girl.”

“Poster Girl?” Brian asked as he looked at AJ with a worried look. He knew the words to that song…

“Yes B I think that’s a good don’t you all?” he asked the fans smiling. “Now I must let you all know that I’m a little rusty with this song but…I think you’ll like it anyway.” He began to hum the beat smiling as Nick and Howie joined in. “I guess it will be acapella…” he said and began to sing the first verse.

Josie was a long way from home
She could make alone look pretty
Her attitude made a part of the landscape
Riding her bike through Alphabet City
She likes to party in the backseat
Under the bridge on the Brooklyn side
Smoking cigarettes in the afterglow
Taking bets that the sun won't rise

She said, "what good is tomorrow without a guarantee?"
She can lick her lips and smile
And make you wanna believe

That the consequences of your actions really are just a game
That your life is just a chain reaction taking you day by day
She says nothing's forever in this crazy world
Still I'm falling in love with the right now poster girl

[End of flashback]

God I wanted to kill him right then and there but I knew he was right. How was I going to do this because yeah she was cute and sexy? Very different to Leighanne but at the end I knew Josie would only be a short fantasy and at the end I would only hurt me. Aside from the ones that I truly loved Leighanne and Baylee….