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Remus’s Birthday Party


After Quidditch practice that evening, James and Sirius insisted that Remus and Peter follow them up to the Gryffindor common room in order to change for dinner. “Couldn’t we just meet you in the Great Hall?” asked Peter, looking at the stairs and thinking how very far off it was for them all to go just for the sake of keeping the other two company, but James and Sirius persisted and they went on up to the common room.

James crawled through first and looked over his shoulder with a grin on his face, then continued through, followed by Sirius, then Peter, and finally Remus. The moment Remus stepped through the portrait hole, there was a spectacular shout - “HAPPY BIRTHDAY!” - and he jumped backwards, surprised to find that the whole of Gryffindor was out in the common room, and there was a delicious assortment of food and drinks and a giant cake on the table where he usually studied with Lily. There were streamers hanging about and a big sign magicked by James late at night the night before that was strung up on the wall with a sticking charm. It was the biggest deal that had ever been made of Remus, and he felt his cheeks flush, overwhelmed by everything that was happening.

“Surprise, mate!” Sirius cried, slapping his arm over Remus’s shoulders, “Are you shocked?”

“Two-hundred and forty volts,” he replied, blinking in disbelief.

Sirius looked positively ecstatic, “Good!”

The party was brilliant. The House Elves had spared no time or talent to creating the private feast for the Gryffindors and they ate like kings, the whole house. People kept coming over and congratulating Remus on turning fourteen and wishing him many more birthdays to come. Remus thanks them all profusely, positively knocked down by how much attention and love he was getting. Some of it was because of the food (this was obvious when one of the seventh years had no idea who “Ree-moose Loopine” was, even as he scoffed down his second helping of cake), but really it wasn’t about all the other people anyway - it was about the work that the other three Marauders had put into pulling it off, and Remus felt truly wanted for the first time in his life.

Later in the evening, he sat on the stairs, watching everybody mill about and talk, reflecting on this feeling. He was seated part in shadow, a piece of cake on a plate balanced on his lap, and the silver and gold party hat sort of tilted on his head. It had easily been the most brilliant day of his entire life.

Then Sirius came over, bounding up the stairs and sat down on the step beside him. “Hey,” Sirius said, smiling as he leaned back so that he was sort of laying across the stairs, his legs sprawled a couple down and his elbows resting on the one behind them. “Are you having a good time, mate?”

Remus swallowed the bit of cake he’d just put in his mouth, nodding, “Yeah. I can’t believe you lot did this.”

“James did most of it, honestly, since you and I were out in the Shack and Peter was at home,” Sirius confessed, “He said the house elves were a huge help. Tizzy’s brother works in the kitchens. Did you know?”

“I didn’t know Tizzy had a brother,” Remus said. “Actually, I didn’t know house elves in general could have brothers and sisters. I reckon it only makes sense that they do… seeing as they don’t spontaneously combust from thin air or anything… I just never really thought on it before, I s’pose.”

Sirius laughed, “I never really had, either. I hope Kreacher doesn’t have any family. One is more than enough of him.” He shuddered.

Remus smiled and stared at the cake-smeared platter on his knees, unsure what to say.

“We’ve got a present for you up in the dorm,” Sirius added.

“You didn’t have to do that,” Remus replied, “This is more than enough.” He waved at the party.

“Well, honestly, James got the present, too... Peter wasn’t here... and, you know, because I’m a Gryffindor and my family hates me, I don’t have a whole lot of funding,” Sirius said. He leaned his head back stretching, “One day, I’ll have a job and I’ll buy you a stupendous present. Anything you like, you can have.”

Remus laughed, “Anything?”

“Anything at all.”

He looked at Sirius, his eyes moving over the way the muscles in his neck tensed as he tilted his head, side to side, stretching the tendons. Sirius still had a boyish face but just the slightest hint of the beginnings of some facial hair were starting to poke out along his jawline and it made the breath catch a bit in Remus’s throat. He wanted to touch it and see if it was scratchy or if it was soft like Snuffle’s fur was. He felt his mouth go dry and he wondered what Sirius would think of the “anything” that Remus really wanted from him.

He wondered if it would be a plus at all that the anything he wanted cost no money at all.

Peter and James suddenly came over, Peter carrying a plate with his third helping of cake, and James said, “Oi, what’re we all doing over here?”

“Just talking,” Sirius replied.

“Talking? Blimey, when there’s a party going on?” James sounded shocked.

Remus laughed, “I’m just enjoying watching everybody!”

Lily came up behind the other two, “Hey… hey. Sorry. Hey Remus!” she smiled up at him, “I just wanted to wish you a Happy Birthday. I didn’t realize it was coming up or else I’d have gotten you something, but I’ll remember next year.” She slipped between Peter and James and sat down on the other side of Remus from Sirius.

“Mine’s in just a couple weeks, Evans,” James said loudly, “Just so you know. The 27th. That’s my birthday. Yup.

Ignoring James, she turned to Remus and placed a kiss on his cheek, “Thanks for being born, Rey.”

He turned quite red.

“Oi, are you going to kiss me like that come the 27th?” James asked, excited.

“No, Potter, I’m not,” Lily answered flatly.

“Well that’s not fair,” James pouted.

“Some things in life are just not fair,” Lily said. “It’s best you learn about it now, ickle tot.”

“Ickle tot?”

“Yes, you’re an ickle tot! Not even 14 yet!” Lily teased him.

James looked most displeased - he was the sort of lad that said things like he was 13½ or 13¾ - and Lily knew it. “Oi, you aren’t that much older than me, Evans… Only a couple months.”

She smirked and kissed Rey’s cheek a second time. “Happy Birthday.”

“Thanks, Lily.”

She looked ‘round at the others, “Now you lot stay out of trouble! I’m sure you’ve got all sorts of horrible, naughty things planned to celebrate.”

“Out of trouble? Us?” Sirius sat up, “You know who you’re talking to? Is that even possible?”

“Give it a go once in awhile,” Lily replied, and she ducked around James who was pointing to his puffed out cheek as though it were a target for her to strike with a kiss, but she didn’t even slow down.

James turned back to look at Remus. “TWO kisses? You ruddy prat.”

Remus smiled and shrugged, looking down.

“Rey’s just got it going on with the ladies, James,” Sirius declared. Then he thought better of it and looked at Remus and back to James, “And also with the gentlemens.”

“I haven’t got anything going on with the gentlemens yet,” Remus replied.

Sirius guffawed, “Well there you are, Rey, an absolute sea of prospects. Who do you fancy? I’ll go and fetch them for you.” He waved his arm over the party millers below.

Remus’s face burned.

Peter bit his lips and turned away, looking over the partiers, too.

“If I was you, I’d go for Andy,” said James quickly. “Though, he’s with Carly Shaw, so you’ll have to fight her for ‘im… but blimey, he’s got some great muscles and --”

“Hullo? Potter? Are you the gay one?” Sirius interrupted.

James laughed, “I’m not interested, really, I’m just saying if I was he’s who I’d go for.”

“He’s got bucky teeth though,” Peter pointed out, “And his head’s sort of shaped like a horse to boot.”

Sirius leaned into Remus, and put his arm ‘round his shoulders, “Seriously, mate, you must’ve realized you were gay for somebody - and don’t tell me Severus Snape, we already crossed that bridge of horrors.”

“Say what now?” Peter turned about, having not heard the story about the amortentia.

“Oh yeaaah,” Sirius said, nodding, “We didn’t tell you about Remus’s love affair with the greasy-headed git, did we?”

Peter shook his head, “Does sound rather an interesting dish, though?”

“Severus was using love potion on Evans - and Rey accidentally drank some of it. Next thing you know…” James batted his eyes and clasped his hands over his shoulder, “He was in loooove.”

Sirius turned to Remus, “So c’mon, mate, out with it, who is it you fancy?”

Remus shook his head.

“Reyyyyy…” Sirius grabbed at him, making Remus laugh and fall backwards a bit, the party hat hitting the rungs of the stairs and tipping just a bit further so that Remus looked like a unicorn with it.

“I’m not telling you, you ruddy idiot,” laughed Remus as Sirius continued badgering him.

“Why not!”

“Because it’s a secret!” Remus replied. He sat up and Sirius stopped poking at him. “Besides, I don’t reckon he would feel the same way back. He’s straight.”

James considered this, “Has he got a girlfriend?”

“Sort of,” Remus replied.

“Well does he snog her a lot?” Sirius asked, “‘cos if he isn’t snogging her near constantly than something’s wrong and I’m betting it’s that he’s more camp than a row of tents.”

James laughed, “That’s the stupidest euphemism you’ve ever used.”

Sirius said, “It isn’t! I dunno what it’s supposed to reference, but it means the bloke’s gayer than gay!”

Remus said, “I doubt it. If he is, then he puts on quite a show of being not gay. And besides, it’s not as though I’m particularly a catch. Even if he was gay - he’d probably turn me down based on how ugly I am.”

Sirius looked over at Remus and said, “Oi what the hell is this? Don’t you go saying that - ever. You’re not ugly, mate.” He was very stern as he said it.

Remus shrugged, “With all my scars and such… It’s just hard to love a monster.”

“Any man would be insane not to want you, Remus Lupin,” Sirius said, looking directly into his eyes.

Remus felt a jolt so deep that his stomach was nearly ill from it. His voice shook ever so slightly, “Do you mean that?”

“Of course I do!” Sirius replied, laughing, his eyes twinkling, “You can’t possibly think you’re not easily the most amazing person in this entire school. You’re just so damn good, Rey. There isn’t a bloody person alive that could ever truly think of you as a monster.”

Remus stared at him, eyes wide.

“Are you alright, then?” Sirius asked.

And without thinking, because his brain had gone so impossibly numb from the words that Sirius had spoken, Remus did it. He lunged forward and pressed his mouth against Sirius’s. They were hot and a little dry and crackly, but it didn’t matter - they were Sirius Black’s - and his heart raced about twenty trillion miles an hour, bouncing off his chest like a jackhammer. He closed his eyes, knowing if he saw the look of surprise on Sirius’s face he’d die a thousand times over. At first, it sort of felt like maybe Sirius was okay with it, like maybe he was even about to kiss him back, but then Sirius stiffened and he pulled away quickly, pushing Remus off him, palms splayed on his shoulders.

James and Peter both had dropped jaws.

Sirius stared at Remus for a really long moment that seemed to stretch on into eternity. This was it, this was the moment that Remus’s heart would stop altogether and he’d just cease to exist - he could tell. He was about to melt into the ruddy stair. He couldn’t breathe. Please, he thought, staring into Sirius’s eyes, Please, say something. Anything. Preferably something good.

“What in the hell was that, Lupin?” Sirius demanded, his voice laced with honest confusion.

Unable to speak, Remus leaped up and ran down the steps to the portrait hole and out the door. His footsteps echoed loudly in the corridor as he rushed as fast as he could along, stripping off the party hat as he went, tossing it to the side. He ran as hard as he could, his knees aching and breath burning his throat before he stopped, several floors down, bent over and clutching his shins, trying not to throw up with how dizzy he was.

“What in the hell WAS that, Lupin?” he asked himself, shaking his head, “Oh bloody hell. What have I done?”