Everything about their relationship was so new and exciting, but at the same time they had put up with so much shit in a short amount of time it felt like they'd been dating forever. The kids were always going to add a layer of complexity, reduce the amount of time they could spend learning and loving each other. Nick was fine with that, more than fine. Having his and Kevin's kids together, all of them a family was a dream come true. What was not, was sharing all of this time with Brian. It would be one thing if Brian had opened up, tried talking to them at all. If Nick could see an end in sight to his stay and his life returning to normal he would be less irritable about the whole thing. But as it stood, Brian was acting like this was some kind of exotic vacation in the middle of Nick's living room and he felt like he was going insane.
Nick slammed the bedroom door as he entered the bedroom. He'd just put Odin and Saoirse down and now had a free hour or so before they woke from their naps. All he wanted to do was crawl into Kevin's arms and forget the world for a little while. He stopped short as he watched Kevin lacing up his shoes.
Glaring at the other man he said "Where the hell do you think you're going?"
Kevin looked up at him with a smirk. "Brian and I were going to go down to the stables and brush the horses. Is that a problem Nicky?"
Nick groaned and threw himself down on the bed. Kevin chuckled and finished tying his shoes. Walking over to the bed he sat on the edge and turned to face his lover. "What's going on baby?"
Nick huffed and turned away from him. He knew he was being childish but he didn't care. He was so frustrated he could scream. Wasn't Kevin as bothered by Brian taking up all their time as he was? Why was he spending his afternoon with Brian when he could be spending it with him? He jerked slightly as he felt Kevin begin to rub his hand up and down Nick's back in smooth slow circles. Nick squeezed his eyes shut, determined not to cry. His bad mood was causing his emotions to run all over the place and all he wanted right now was Kevin's comfort. He took several deep breaths and shifted his backside until he was closer to the other man. Kevin smiled and continued to stroked his back, calming the man in the process. After a few moments Nick felt relaxed enough to roll onto his back and face Kevin.
"I'm sorry." he mumbled before hiding his face against Kevin's jean clad thigh. Kevin brushed the hair out of his eyes before cupping his cheek. "Don't be sorry, just tell me what's got you so keyed up."
"You'll laugh at me." came the mumbled response as Nick's mouth pressed into the fabric of Kevin's pants. He kissed and nuzzled his thigh, trying to hide the blush in his face. Kevin shook his head and pulled Nick away enough so he could look at his face. "I will never laugh at you. Talk to me."
Nick huffed again and threw himself onto his back. "I can't believe it's not bothering you that he's still here." Nick accused, unable to meet Kevin's eyes. "And now you're spending the afternoon with him instead of spending time with me. We've had barely any time together at all and now he's here and taking more time away from us."
Kevin smiled. This man, this adorable man had his heart. He'd always had it, but it was in sweet innocent moments like this that Kevin realized just how much of a goner he really was when it came to the blonde. "Who said I'm not annoyed he's still here?" Kevin asked softly. He stretched out on the bed beside Nick and propped his head up with his arm so he could peer down at the other man.
Nick shrugged. "You just don't seem annoyed. You haven't made him talk to us and he's still here." Nick pouted, his bottom lip extending out too far for Kevin's liking.
Kevin leaned down and took that bottom lip between his own. Kissing the other man thoroughly before pulling away and smiling down at him. "I love you. You are adorable. I am very frustrated. I want to turn him upside down and shake him until he spills all the problems that brought him to our door, but it's not going to make this easier on any of us. You know as well as I do that he has to be the one to get to the place where he is able to open up. Believe me baby, this is driving me just as crazy, but Brian is family and he needs us right now. We, we're forever and I promise you baby as soon as we're free of houseguests I will make up for all of this lost time. Don't be embarrassed to miss me because I am missing you just as much."
Nick blushed again and buried his head against Kevin's chest. "I'm sorry for being a baby. I'm just frustrated and I want to spend time with you."
Kevin wrapped his arm around Nick's head, cradling it close to his body. "I completely understand, baby. I feel the same way. I thought if I got him outside with the horses and away from everyone maybe he would talk to me. The sooner we get to the bottom of whatever happened the sooner we can get him out of our house."
Nick laughed against Kevin's chest. "I know. I'm sorry I'm such a baby."
Kevin smiled and pushed Nick back down on the bed. "You're not a baby, you're MY baby. Let me make you feel better before I go outside."
Nick blushed and bit his lip. Kevin groaned. "You're going to kill me with that lip." he leaned down and took Nick's mouth in a bruising kiss. While he distracted Nick with his kisses, he quickly slipped his hand under Nick's shorts. He felt Nick groan into his mouth as Kevin gently wrapped his hand around Nick's hardening length. He continued the kisses, breaking away from Nick's mouth and adding several kisses on his cheeks and his jaw line. While he placed kisses he sped up the movement of his hand, pumping Nick's cock as it pulsed against him. He felt his own erection starting but this was about making Nick feel better. He shifted closer as he buried his face in Nick's neck, biting and gently sucking the skin he loved so much.
"God baby, that feels so good. Please don't stop." Nick bucked his hips up to meet the pace of Kevin's hand as he panted and tried desperately to hold on.
"I'll never stop Nicky. Just feel it baby. Just feel how good I take care of you, how great it's going to be when we get some time later. I love you baby." Kevin sped up his movements, jerking and rubbing Nick faster as he watched Nick's breathing hitch. He knew he was close and wanted to watch Nick's beautiful face as he gave in to the feeling. Kevin leaned down and kissed him deeply, tongues darting from mouth to mouth, caressing and sucking. Kevin broke the kiss regretfully as Nick's body started to shake. He watched in awe as the man he loved so much completely fell apart beneath him, shooting hot streams of liquid inside his shorts and all over Kevin's hand. Kevin pulled his hand out of Nick's shorts and wiped it on the sheets, smiling at the complete look of bliss on his lovers face. He got up and went into the bathroom to wash his hands. Reentering the bedroom he grabbed the baby monitor and moved it closer to the bedside table he turned the volume all the way up and then sat back down in the bed.
"Why don't you take a nap. Just lay here and relax until you fall asleep." Kevin leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on Nick's lips.
Nick smiled and nodded. "Why does a simple hand job feel so damn good Kev?"
Kevin smiled down at him. "It does doesn't it? Way better than doing it yourself. I think it's because we love each other and we're perfect for each other and so every thing we do together is that much better, that much more intense." Kevin answered honestly.
Nick smiled up at him as he settled into the bed pillows. "We really are, aren't we?" Nick asked sleepily, his eyes drifting closed.
Kevin leaned down and kissed his cheek. "Of course we are, baby. I love you."
Standing up Kevin turned off the bedside lamp and turned to look at the sleeping man. This bundle of nerves, anxiety and love was all he'd ever wanted in life. He completely understood where Nick was coming from and wanted nothing else than for Brian to leave so they could have time just for them. He had no idea the extended visit was bothering the blonde as much as it was. Kevin vowed to do everything in his power to make sure they helped Brian as much as he could, but also got him back out the door as quickly as humanly possible. Nick smiled in his sleep and Kevin felt his heartbeat quicken. The love, the want and need he felt for Nick just continued to grow everyday. Sometimes the desire was so strong it took his breath away. This was surprising for Kevin. He'd always believed that the unrequited feelings he felt for the blonde were the strongest he'd ever feel. But they were nothing in comparison to how he felt now that he had Nick in his life, his heart and his bed.
It was cold out. Kevin wished he'd grabbed his scarf before they trudged outside but he'd forgotten. It was too late now to worry about going back. He tucked his chin further into his jacket and pulled the beanie down in his head. They made their way across the acreage and towards the stables. They didn't talk as they walked, both men content in the silence. Kevin kept racking his brain, trying desperately to think of a way to get Brian to open up. He was very close to pushing him in the hay and standing over him until the man started talking. Kevin smiled to himself. It had worked when they were kids.
Once they reached the stables Kevin set to work turning on the lanterns hanging outside the stalls and checking all the horses for food and water. Brian had spent so much time on Kevin's dad's farm as a child he knew what to do without direction from Kevin. Brian began moving hay around, making sure each stall had an adequate supply. They worked side by side for a while, neither man speaking. The silence was starting to drive Kevin insane. With his chores done he went to find the brushes. Grabbing one for him and one for Brian he met the other man in the middle of the barn. Handing over the brush he followed Brian to a stall. Once they were both inside and had begun brushing the horse down Kevin had enough.
Brian blanched and looked up at him, eyes wide. "What are you talking about?"
"I'm talking about the fact that you've been here for four four days and not a word. You crashed our Thanksgiving, eaten our food, and holed up in our living room, I think the least you can do is talk to me. What's going on? Why did Leighanne kick you out?"
Brian stopped brushing and stared off into space. He was quiet for several moments before he spoke. "We've been fighting a lot lately. We've always had somewhat of a disconnect in our beliefs, in our values. What didn't seem like big deals when we got married has become bigger as we've gotten older. For the longest time I just went along with whatever she felt like we should feel or believe in because it was easier and at the time even though I didn't believe what she did, it didn't affect me one way or the other and I was never passionate about it so it was easier for me, for our marriage to just agree and take up the cause beside her. As I've gotten older and I've changed, and the world's changed, it has become a lot more obvious where we differ."
Kevin looked at him curiously. He had a hunch where this was going but wasn't sure if he should come out with it or not. When it was clear that Brian wasn't going to continue he turned to his cousin. "She has a problem with Nick and I?"
Brian looked up at him sharply. Unable to believe Kevin could decipher his cryptic explanation and know immediately what the heart of the matter was. He'd been so scared to talk to them about it, to explain. But at the same time when it had come time to leave his home, they were the only two people he knew he could count on. Brian nodded. "Yes, and no. There's more to it. It's such a mess Kevin. I never wanted any of this to happen. I didn't want to feel this way. I should have just kept my mouth shut. But I didn't tell her ahead of time and when the announcement was made she went absolutely ballistic. I tried to talk to her, to explain but I said the wrong things and made it worse and now I have no idea what's going to happen. You have to know I'd never do anything to intentionally hurt either of you. I love you both so much." he tears welled up in his eyes, his accent growing thicker as the emotion filled his voice.
Something in Brian's explanation struck Kevin and he felt a white hot fear run through him. At first he thought he was mistaken, that he'd heard wrong. But as he watched Brian pace in the stall he felt his stomach lurch and knew that he, in fact, had figured out the crux of the issue at hand. "How long?"
Brian stopped pacing and turned to face him. Kevin felt his breath catch as he waited for the response. "How long what Kev?"
"How long have you been in love with my boyfriend?"
Brian stared at him for a moment before looking away. Bingo, Kevin thought. A sick feeling of dread and apprehension filling him. Brian didn't look back at him, instead he searched around the horse stall until he located the bale of hay and collapsed down on top of it. "A really long time. I don't even know anymore."
Kevin tried to remain calm. Inside he wanted to puke, he felt the earth move underneath him and he was afraid if he made any sudden movement he would end up on the floor of the horse stall, right under the horse.
Brian dropped his head in his hands. "I'm sorry Kevin. I never wanted to think about this to talk about it. I never imagined we'd be having this conversation. I never wanted either of you to know. I'm not here to make trouble for you, I promise. I would never try to get in the way of what you have. I just have to be honest with you. A lot of things were yelled in the heat of the moment, I apparently revealed more than I anticipated and she figured it out. She told me there wasn't going to be a faggot living in her house and I had to pack my shit and get out."
Kevin didn't know how to respond. On one hand he was glad Brian was finally opening up, trusting him, to tell him what happened. But on the other hand, one of Kevin's worst nightmares was coming true right in front of him. He took a deep breath before responding, fear and anger raging a war inside of him. "I don't know what to say."
Brian shot up off the hay bay. "Kevin, I'm sorry. I never meant for any of this to happen. Nothing is going to change. I don't even plan on telling him. This is just something I have to work through on my own. Like I said, I'm not here to try to get in between you. I just needed to be with you both, with family. I know this probably changes things between us but it doesn't have to. Give me one more day to make some calls and I'll get out of your hair."
Kevin looked at him for several moments before backing away. "I.. I need some time." he backed out of the stall and with one last look at Brian he left him standing in the stable. Kevin wasn't sure what to do or where to go. He couldn't go back to the house, not yet. He could feel the tension vibrating off of him and he knew Nick would be able to tell something was wrong the moment he saw him. Kevin wasn't sure he wanted Nick to know yet. He was terrified, he felt sick at his stomach and thought momentarily he would throw up. He stumbled down the path from the barn, further into the wooded area of his property. He couldn't believe this was happening. Sure Brian could say it wouldn't change anything until he was blue in the face but Kevin was terrified. They were Frick and Frack. Kevin had always been jealous of their relationship, their closeness. It wasn't until Brian got married that Nick really started reaching out to him for support and comfort. It had been a blessing and a curse. Nick had been heartbroken when Brian had gotten married, so much so that Kevin had always secretly wondered if Nick had feelings for Brian outside of their friendship.
And now, now that same man who crushed that little boy all those years ago was suddenly single, and apparently in love with him. Where did that leave Kevin? He tried not to let the dark thoughts overtake him, but how could he not? It was one thing for the outside world to be against them but now it seemed like they were being sabotaged from the inside. The sick feeling was back. Kevin found a tree stump and settled into it. Dropping his head between his knees he took several deep breaths, trying desperately to get the feeling to pass. He felt a couple of tears slide down his cheeks and chastised himself for getting all upset before he had a reason to be. Just because Brian had feelings for Nick didn't mean Nick returned them. He'd said he loved Kevin, wanted to spend their lives together, right? In a million years he never would have expected Brian to have feelings for Nick, but at the same time it sort of made sense. When Brian had found out the reasoning behind Kevin’s divorce he had gotten really shitty with him, tried desperately to talk him out of going through with it. Telling Kevin over and over again how leaving his wife would be the biggest mistake of Kevin’s life. In hindsight, Kevin wondered if Brian just couldn’t stomach the thought of him being in love with Nick as well. Then there was the blow up between Nick and Brian once Brian found out Nick was there and staying with Kevin. Kevin still wasn’t sure what all had been said between the two friends but knew it had to be intense for Nick to have reacted the way he did when Brian had shown up there unannounced the first time. There were so many thoughts swirling around his head he wasn’t sure how to get them all straight. He took another deep breath. He had to figure out something before he went back to the house. One thing was for sure, he couldn’t face Nick in the current state he was in.