Absolute Chaos Discussion Boards
Fic Talk => I Challenge You.... => Topic started by: mare on July 18, 2011, 02:45:44 AM
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I think I got everyone! If for some reason I made a mistake, let me know but otherwise I think I did a pretty good job! This was not easy!!
Steph, you're the only one that got two stories! I hope that's okay! :)
Here is the list below. I'll gradually add the links tonight but of course you can always just find them yourselves lol
You can start reading them today and don't forget you should post feedback in the thread as well as the actual story site. If you have any questions for the author etc...put them in the thread so we can all kind of see what's going on.
I'll be sending you a final survey to fill out towards the end of the month about the story you are reading.
Enjoy and happy reading!!
00 Carter: Mellz Bellz, Sakabelle
http://absolutechaos.net/viewstory.php?sid=9085
A Little Taste of Sin: Summer03
http://absolutechaos.net/viewstory.php?sid=8686
Best of Both Worlds: Julilly
http://absolutechaos.net/viewstory.php?sid=9152
Casual: Rose
http://absolutechaos.net/viewstory.php?sid=8947
Games: DelphinaCarter
http://absolutechaos.net/viewstory.php?sid=10319&warning=4
Ice Cold Blood: Sapphire
http://absolutechaos.net/viewstory.php?sid=10054&warning=5
It Stays With You: kevmylove, alota_cookin
http://absolutechaos.net/viewstory.php?sid=3154
Love This Pain: TheDistantHear t
http://absolutechaos.net/viewstory.php?sid=10435
My Answer Is You: RokofAges75
http://absolutechaos.net/viewstory.php?sid=10380
My Mona Lisa: Carter-Orange
http://absolutechaos.net/viewstory.php?sid=9966
October Road: Mare
http://absolutechaos.net/viewstory.php?sid=10456
Sinister Devotion: cabybakes
http://absolutechaos.net/viewstory.php?sid=9374
Stockholm Syndrome: myconfession
http://absolutechaos.net/viewstory.php?sid=10078
Room 438: Cologuard_diva
http://absolutechaos.net/viewstory.php?sid=8100
Tooth Fairy: Purpura Lipstick
http://absolutechaos.net/viewstory.php?sid=10441
Visions of Love: Carterkid
http://absolutechaos.net/viewstory.php?sid=10205
You Give Love a Bad Name: Carter-Orange
http://absolutechaos.net/viewstory.php?sid=9813
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Only fill this out AFTER you are completely done with the story you are reading and then post it in this thread :)
1) Name of the story you read and the author and what you feel the genre is. Your answer might be different then the authors.
2) Would you have ever read this story if it wasn't a challenge?
3) What was your favorite scene?
4) Who was your favorite character and why?
5) Overall tell us one reason why you think someone else should/or shouldn't read this story.
6) Did it convert you to the genre it is? Would you be willing to read another story just like it?
7) Give one piece of concrit that might help the author for future reference. This can be positive too, concrit doesn't always mean negative.
8) This should be the question the author asked in their survey. Everyone's will be different.
9) Would you recommend this story and author to another person? Why or why not
10) Out of 10 stars what would you give this story?
11) Do you think after you are done reading what's there so far (and you only have to read however many chapters are there when the start of this challenge was given) Do you think you will continue to read the story through to the end to see what happens to the characters?
And for those of you reading completed stories, if there was a sequel, would you be curious enough to continue reading on?
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I picked 3 stories but we can't post our picks until tomorrow right?
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Right :) Wait until you see me post that it's time to start challenging.
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Okay, so just clarifying... We all challenge three people, but that doesn't mean, even if all three of those people accept, that we end up having to read three stories, plus possibly a fourth from someone else challenging us, because you decide the final duels. Is that right?
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That is correct. You will only have to read one story unless you choose to duel more than one person.
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Okay, good, thanks! I just don't want to get in over my head when I know the next month is going to get crazy busy.
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Okay, so just clarifying... We all challenge three people, but that doesn't mean, even if all three of those people accept, that we end up having to read three stories, plus possibly a fourth from someone else challenging us, because you decide the final duels. Is that right?
So when we challenge three people, we challenge them to read our story, right? I feel blonde right now, but I swear it's not because I'm dying my hair at this very minute.
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LOL yes, that is correct. If you challenge them and you are paired up, you have to read theirs as well. So it's one of those things where you want to make sure you want to read the person who you are going to challenge.
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Time to start the challenge! :)
Start posting your challenges in this thread. Only respond to the challenge if you DO NOT accept it. It'll be easier for me to keep track that way. Of course you can comment etc... but make it clear that you aren't accepting so and so's challenge by quoting them in your post.
I'll really be trying my best to keep track of everything going on to figure out who will be dueling who or whom...whateve r, too lazy to look up the grammar rules. You know what I mean.
If you are first on someone's list and they are first on yours, odds are the two of you will be dueling. But i'm sure it won't be as easy as that lol
Try to get all the challenges in by Friday so this way I have the weekend to sort through and figure things out. The sooner the better though.
Okay, so start posting!!!
En Garde! hehe
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Mare, I just notice my story is only listed as drama, but it's also romance. Just wanted to let you know.
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and your story is? lol
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My Answer Is You
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Thanks! I didnt feel like combing through the threads lol
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Ok...here are my challenges in no particular order:
00Carter
Sinister Devotion
Stockholm Syndrome
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and why you picked them, it might help them decide if they want to duel you or not.
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and also remember if they read your story they can't accept your challenge.
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Me from the other thread:
Anyways... picking my three stories was pretty darn easy cuz every story falls into one of the categories I can't choose from...except 5, and of those 5, one is in a genre I marked that I preferred not to read...which leaves me with 4, and one of those I had started to read at one time...so BOOM...I'm left with 3.
From this thread:
Mare, I just notice my story is only listed as drama, but it's also romance. Just wanted to let you know.
....and now I'm left with two, LMAO! (cuz romance is a genre I'm not supposed to read from) And they are...Love This Pain and It Stays With You. And if all else fails, I'll give Games a shot, which is the one in the genere I don't particularly care for.
Oh...and I picked these stories...well ...because that's what i was left with. :D
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okay after going through all the options and really trying to stay away from what normally read, these are my three er five Now I had very little to choose from given I've read most of them or started reading and just need to catch up! ok enough blabbering:
It stays with you
Love is Pain
Room 438
Best of both worlds
A little taste of sin
these are the ones I have not read at all and so I choose anyone if these.
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Ok...here are my challenges in no particular order:
00Carter
Sinister Devotion
Stockholm Syndrome
I picked them bc I am trying to get out of my little niche. 00carter is long like Casual so I figured it would be good to pair up with something equal in length. I've heard great things about the other two.
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My challenges are....(they aren't in any special order)
Stockholm Syndrome
Tooth Fairy
Games
I chose them because they were in the genres I don't normally read.
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This was really hard! lol After a lot of contemplation here are my choices...
Games - I never read crossover fics, so this is something definitely out of my element. Luckily I have seen Supernatural so I'm familiar with the characters somewhat but I never would have imagined myself reading Spn fanfic.
Best of Both Worlds - At first glance this is definitely the type of romance I would typically avoid. (don't hurt me) From the summary it seems like a plotline that is somewhat cliche, but I'm willing to see whether or not the writing brings it above that. :)
Room 438 - It's a Kevin fic and that ALONE means it's WAY out of my comfort zone. Way, way, way.
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Good job so far peeps! Keep them coming.
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As you post your challenges i'll be bolding your names in the 1st post. Just in case you're wondering why your name is bolded lol
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Here are mine, I chose them because I've not read them and they are in the genres I'm allowed to pick from.
A Little Taste of Sin
You Give Love A Bad Name
Ice Cold Blood
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I accept the challenge from Colorguard_div a if Mare says yes. LOL
I have my list-
It Stays With You
Visions of Love
Stockholm Syndrome
I've heard great things about them and they are on my 'want to read' list!
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Ok...here are my challenges in no particular order:
00Carter
Sinister Devotion
Stockholm Syndrome
Alas, I cannot accept this challenge as I have already read Casual. :(
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When picking my three, I did not look to see who wrote them or anything else. I simply went by what was written in this thread.
1. Stockholm Syndrome
- The title alone intrigues me LOL
2. Games
Want the truth? I did innie-minnie-mighty-mo. LOL!
3. Sinister Devotion
Honestly? Every one I kept picking I went to check against Romance and Drama and they were all there.
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I accept the challenge from Colorguard_div a if Mare says yes. LOL
I have my list-
It Stays With You
Visions of Love
Stockholm Syndrome
I've heard great things about them and they are on my 'want to read' list!
If you want to accept her challenge, you would have to pick her story. You can replace mine if you'd like. :)
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okay you guys are making this difficult because so far no one has matched up at all LOL It's still early though we'll see what happens.
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If I have to, I can switch mine up. Mine are in no real order.
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When picking my three, I did not look to see who wrote them or anything else. I simply went by what was written in this thread.
1. Stockholm Syndrome
- The title alone intrigues me LOL
2. A Little Taste of Sin
I've seen this story but never got the chance to read it, plus again, I like the title.
3. Games
Want the truth? I did innie-minnie-mighty-mo. LOL!
Not to be an asshole, but (as I try to figure out who the hell I'm challenging) I thought you couldn't challenge a story that's in a genre you like/write in a lot? Like Mel's story being a romance?
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I think i'm going to have to do this differently. LOL
Instead of making it a duel it'll be more of a read off. Since no one i matching up. What i'm going to do instead of a this person versus that person, i'll instead assign you guys one of the stories you picked. If an aithor does happen to match up then i'll make you read each other's stories.
And yes, if you said you read romance than you can't pick a romance.
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So, keep sending in your three stories like nothing has changed lol
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My three picks were easy.
Games- I don't know a thing about Supernatural. Its something I don't normally read but looked interesting.
Visions Of Love- its not a romance but it looked like I may end up liking it.
Ice Cold Blood- I don't usually read vampire fics as I hate twilight but I'm willing to try.
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Mare I accept Steph's challenge as I am willing to read her story and she chose mine!
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I will keep that in mind Tracy, I just need to see how everyone else posts. This is a lot harder than it was when there were only a few of us. I'm glad so many people are participating though just not a duel anymore. LOL
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Not to be an asshole, but (as I try to figure out who the hell I'm challenging) I thought you couldn't challenge a story that's in a genre you like/write in a lot? Like Mel's story being a romance?
Uhh, which one is Mel's? Like I said, i didn't pick them based on who wrote them. Maybe I got it mixed up.
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Uhh, which one is Mel's? Like I said, i didn't pick them based on who wrote them. Maybe I got it mixed up.
A Little Taste of Sin.
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No, I know where I saw it. Angst. I didn't pick it as a romance, I didn't even look at the romances.
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Fuck, I thought I saw that under Suspense. I'll go change it LOL
If you're looking for a Suspense, I'd say go with It Stays With You.
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What happens if no one picks your story in their 3?
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No, I know where I saw it. Angst. I didn't pick it as a romance, I didn't even look at the romances.
You're right, it's also listed under romance. A lot of the stories are listed in more than one genre depending on what you guys said they were. No biggie, just pick something else. I know it's confusing lol
Sorry guys! I thought it was be so easy peasy. lol
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No, I know where I saw it. Angst. I didn't pick it as a romance, I didn't even look at the romances.
same reason I picked that story too its on angst. hmmm I guess scratch it off my list.
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What happens if no one picks your story in their 3?
I will read it. I'm waiting til the end to pick just in case that happens.
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I shouldn't have put A Little Taste of Sin as it's romance, but I think it was also listed as something else too.
I accept Tracy's challenge though :)
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http://absolutechaos.net/fictalk/index.php/topic,2756.msg93351.html#msg93351\
redid mine.
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Best Of Both Worlds - Like Julilly said, it's one of those stories I likely wouldn't click on. Just because it sounds a little cliche. But this is about being away from the comfort zone, so yeah.
Visions of Love - It's centered around AJ and Howie and a comedy. I saw this on the most recent and knew that I probably wouldn't click just cause of that lol. Unless it's about the group, I tend to be more Nick/Brian and sometimes Kevin centered in terms of stories.
My Answer Is You - Another one that sounded like a story I'd never click on lol. Just not my taste, but this is all about stepping outside the comfort zone. So why not.
Casual - I've heard good things about it. It's a romance, and a long one at that LOL. Another one that would just be skipped.
I made sure to look solely at the genres I normally wouldn't touch LOL. And I also picked four just to keep my options a little open. :)
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http://absolutechaos.net/fictalk/index.php/topic,2756.msg93351.html#msg93351\
redid mine.
Changed it!
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I didn't realize my story was going to cause so much trouble lol. It is listed under angst, romance, drama. I mean I guess if you had to pick an overall category romance, but now thast Mare will match us up this is looking a lot easier.
My three are in no particular order:
Stockholm Syndrome - Heard good things about this and I don't think I've actually read anything by Julilly.
It Stays With You - Haven't read this one by Mare
00Carter - Because I'm so not usually into the Action/Adventure kind of stories and have no interest in any of the James Bond movies so it would be a big stretch for me.
I'm easy though and if you needto assign me to another story I am flexible.
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I didn't realize my story was going to cause so much trouble lol. It is listed under angst, romance, drama. I mean I guess if you had to pick an overall category romance, but now thast Mare will match us up this is looking a lot easier.
My three are in no particular order:
Stockholm Syndrome - Heard good things about this and I don't think I've actually read anything by Julilly.
It Stays With You - Haven't read this one by Mare
00Carter - Because I'm so not usually into the Action/Adventure kind of stories and have no interest in any of the James Bond movies so it would be a big stretch for me.
I'm easy though and if you needto assign me to another story I am flexible.
LOL if it helps I didn't mean to either. I didn't realize so many people missed it under romance haha.
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And for the record Mare, if there's any stories I didn't list that I haven't read and you need someone to stick them to, go for it. I'm open to practically anything new on this.
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Had to change my top 3 cause one seemed to be a romance as well lol
This is in no particular order:
It Stays With You - I haven't read much by Mare and I've also heard very positive things about this story so I'm curious.
Visions of Love - I haven't read a lot of Action/Adventure so I'll give it a go.
Love This Pain - Heard a lot of great things about this story so that's why lol
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Excellent, thanks Mel and Rose. Another question, is anyone willing to read more than one story? Just in case?
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I'm so confused right now,Should I re-do my list?
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No I think yours was fine!
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Okay here are mine after several revisions:
Tooth Fairy. This one looked cute in all honesty and I've never read anything by the author or about Baylee.
Stockholm Syndrome. Just like everyone else's reason. I've heard good things and I have honestly never read anything written by the author. Plus, it sounded interesting.
Visions of Love - I just don't read enough comedies these days.
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Excellent, thanks Mel and Rose. Another question, is anyone willing to read more than one story? Just in case?
Possibly but I can't guarantee it with having to start to get ready to go back to work soon. If one is a quick read then yes.
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Wow, we're only waiting on 5 people. You guys are on top of things! lol
And this is a lot easier!
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I'll read more than one. I'm off for 3 weeks this summer so will have plenty of time :)
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Even if it's not on your list? That would be great Steph!
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Wow everyone is picking the same stories.
Room 438- I like the plot.
Ice Cold Blood- haven't read a BSB vampire story in a while.
It Stays with You- I've heard good things about this story
If you need someone else to read Mare, I'm up for it.
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I do have 3 weeks off this Friday but I'm going to Belgium for one week at Saturday so I don't know if I have a lot of time for 1 story let alone 2 (if the weather sucks, I'll be spending a lot of time inside = reading time lol) and in two weeks I'm going on holiday again so same story. I will read when I have some free time so it's not like I won't try to make time lol. But if the 2nd story isn't too long, then sure! Even if it's not on my list. :)
It might sound weird but I'm sure I have more time when I go back to work than on my 3 weeks off LOL
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hubby and child are out of town starting Friday until next Friday. I could probably read another if needed.
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Thanks guys!
Once we hear from the final few i'll know if I need you or not! and I totally understand Imke, I read way more during the school year than I do on vacation lol
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Okay, here are my choices, but I'm willing to read anything if there's something that hasn't been challenged that I missed, as long as they haven't already read mine.
My Answer is You - I've never checked this story out, and it's been a long time since I've read a good Brian romance. I may be a Brian girl, but I don't read a lot of romance, period.
Sinister Devotion - I don't read a lot of AU, and I don't usually like stories where the Boys are not themselves, so this is outside my comfort zone, but I've heard a lot of great things about it too.
October Road - I don't read much AU, and AJ's not my Boy of choice to read about, so both of those things could make this one a challenge for me.
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I can read more than one...i have no life and love to read.
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Excellent!
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We are just waiting on our final two people who were also the last people to enter this *whistles impatiently*
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So do we post here if we accept someone's challenge?
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Alas, I cannot accept this challenge as I have already read Casual. :(
Duh...total blonde moment. I can pick another story...
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Nope, no more challenging now i'm just assigning you a story to read. Once I hear from the final two i'll be able to make the list.
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I may be able to read more than 1 depending on the length, if needed.
And not to highjack or anythign but I had to pause typing this short post because Lillian took her first steps!!!!! :wave: :party: :dancebanana: :cheshire: :broccoli: :bananapower:
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If the story isn't too terribly long, I may be able to do two. I really want to push myself to read more, but football season is coming up with work (but if I get that new job *prays* I won't have to worry with that).
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Thanks Karah and yay Kristal! lol go catch that baby!
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Okay sorry so late. Finally got a job so I can't come here during the day as much.
I choose:
Tooth Fairy - Being that it's listed as dramedy, I thought it might have some comedy in it.
Ice Cold Blood - I don't like vampire stories so I'm going to give it a try.
Love This Pain - Don't read Nick stories so I thought I'd give it go.
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okay Saka Steph, we are waiting on you!! No presssure though! lol
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Sorry! Lol you guys are so quick! I'm choosing...
00Carter
Stockholm Syndrome
It Stays With You
All are genres I don't read very much if at all so I'd be cool with any of them!
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Excellent! Now that everyone has made their choices i'll be posting the reading challenges tonight! Keep your eyes out on the first post!
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I'll read more than one story. I can't guarantee I'll get done with all of it if it's really long.
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no need the list has now been posted :)
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Sweet! Thanks for organizing all this, Mare; that looked like no small task LOL.
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Looks fabulous. :)
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Thanks for putting this together for us, Mare!
Happy reading everyone!!!
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Um...not to be a bother but...I don't see me anywhere on the list. ???
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Yay I can't wait to start reading!!! I am gonna start tonight
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Um...not to be a bother but...I don't see me anywhere on the list. ???
Crap! I'll go check
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Um...not to be a bother but...I don't see me anywhere on the list. ???
I see what I did. Because I keep messing up Karah's story I had two of you reading it lol
I can give you one of Steph' stories. Did you read My Mona Lisa already?
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Yes, I have read My Mona Lisa.
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What about You give Love a Bad Name?
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If you've read that one then you can just read whichever one you want from your list and we'lljust have two people reading the same story. Let me know though so I can let Steph know and then I can add you on the list.
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I'll probably still read all the ones on my list, I will just do the conscrit for my assigned story.
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If not I can change my story if you want I have a few completed so Kristal can read one of her own. just suggesting I don't mind doing it.
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I'm done reading, do I send the stuff via PM to the author?
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I think you're supposed to review the actual story and leave comments in here
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LOL that was fast
The directions are on the first page. You want to comment in the thread and on the actual site. Feel free to comment all the stories Lore. If you are reading them they all deserve some concrit. Nothing wrong with that.
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Tooth Fairy by CarterKid
Pay attention to capitalization and punctuation and spelling. Though I know sometimes, when you write, you go so quickly that you miss them. I don't have a beta so my mistakes sometimes get posted too.
Also as a note, there are two spaces after a period. It makes the sentences easier to discern and flow a little easier.
Something I struggle with too, watch your tense. At one point you are speaking in past tense and then you switch to present tense and then back to past.
I would have loved to read a description of what the room he was taken into was like though there was not a lot a description in your story so to throw that in might be a bit strange.
Once he becomes the Tooth Fairy it really starts to jump a bit and there is less of a flow.
I am having a hard time reading it with it jumping from present to past tense.
I think if you were to expand the story more you would definitely have something.
As for your question: does it flow. I touched on it a couple of times, there are some trip ups with the spelling, grammar and punctuation that interrupt the flow. The change of the tenses tripped me up the most.
I think you could have taken the story of The Tooth Fairy (movie) and expanded on it with what you have, and then some.
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If not I can change my story if you want I have a few completed so Kristal can read one of her own. just suggesting I don't mind doing it.
Thanks for offering, but she's got a few to pick from. She just hasn't done it yet. :)
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Chapter One of Casual - First thoughts.
Okay, my first thoughts. So far, it's well written, structurally speaking. I feel like there's a lot of telling, not a lot of showing. The blog entry, while more personal in the scene, isn't that necessary. It gets kind of reiterated in the scene below it, and made my eyes start to skim through it.
I like the theme, it's sort of Friends With Benefits, but without the actual friendship lol.
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Love This Pain! Woop! I'll start reading tonight (it's morning here so you can expect a review of the first chapter in like 12 hours lol).
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Room 438 -- Chapter 1
It's got me curious about a few things. What is the lawsuit about? Which guy are they suing? Why is Kevin's house creepy?
Questions are good thing because it makes me want to read more to find the answers.
Not really liking Danielle. She seems a little bitchy.
Overall: It's got me curious.
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I started reading My Mona Lisa this morning (quiet day in work :) )
OK, I've read two chapters so far and find that it tends to jump a bit. I got confused who was who in some places and think the comma use didn't really help matters. I also find it odd that a 23 year old who comes from money would look so bad and not attempt to look nice for her new job, especially if she's the public face of the company. I would expect that more from a teenager than a 23 year old.
Anyway, I'll carry on reading and come back with more reviews as I read :)
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Ok...I started reading It Stays With You...I'm on chapter 2...and if it's any indication of how well it's written...I'm not gonna sleep well tonight. LMAO! *shudders, hiding under my bed*
So far it seems to flow well and I can pretty much see the events happening in my head as I read (thus the not sleeping part)...so, as far as that goes, I think it's good. *nervous grin*
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^ good! I'm glad you're liking it so far, Kristal. Hope you don't have nightmares, i'll feel bad. LOL
I'm going to wait a few more chapters before I post my thoughts on October Road, but i'm enjoying it so far. :) and like I told Sapphire, being this is an AU AJ romance with none of the other guys in sight, this was going to be a real challenge for me. I mean, no one even gets a little hurt or turns evil? lol
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I've got to go do a few running arounds in town and then I'm coming back and starting reading :)
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Visions of Love by alota_cookin
I've read two chapters so far and so far,so good. :-*
One question you'd like the person reading it to answer: Do you like the flow of the story and how it's unfolding?
Good so far but I wouldn't have the girls go 'off track' so much. Can't say to much through cause I just started.
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Maybe I'm just stupid, but I'm getting a bit confused with this main character. She started off as Mona and now seems to be called either Lisa or Lizzie?
Onwards I go though! I do like the idea of AJ helping to transform her though and it's good to see that they are getting along.
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I started reading It Stays With You last night, but only reviewed on the chapters. Thought I would post something on the thread.
This is definitely not something I usually read, because it's creepy and about Brian. But I have to say that it's well written and the cliffhangers just keep you coming back. I also like the smooth transitions from his dreams to what I think is reality. Plus the bond between Nick and Brian is what I imagine it was back then!
Uh...ok I shall read some more later tonight.
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I'm reading 00Carter and I decided to respond to each chapter with a story review, but to give my analysis on each episode arc here. So I just finished the first three chapters "Carter... Nick Carter."
So far this arc was basically an introduction to the characters and the agency as a whole. In it we have Nick creating a ridiculous mission for himself to solve. We later learn that is out of boredom as he's been suspended from any real missions for some reason that has not yet been explained.
I thought the character introductions were done well as Nick went around and interrogated each one I felt like I was able to remember who was who and what their role in the agency is. Sometimes when you have stories with 10+ characters it can get confusing, but so far I am good. I also feel like I have a good sense of Nick's character throughout his actions in these past few chapters. So far he strikes me as the kind of agent who may not be the most skillful, but somehow always comes out on top somehow, although I'm sure a lot of the times it is by accident.
As far as any real Con Crit goes the only minor nitpicky thing that I noticed was a continuity error between Chapters 2 and 3 about what Nick was wearing. In Chapter 2 when he is in the elevator with Diamond you mention he is wearing a tie, but in Chapter 3 he is wearing a "snug black shirt and casual jean attire." Not a huge deal I know but for some reason I notice those minor details.
I am intrigued to keep reading and find out about Nick's next mission as well as how his last one went wrong.
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Since I finished Tooth Fairy, I thought I would read some of the other stories on my list.
Stockholm Syndrome. (after 5 chapters)
I like how the beginning of the story jumps right into the action. No background at the beginning but scattered throughout the story.
The story is well-written but I expected nothing less from Julily.
I love the character development, even though they are the boys and you are trying to still stay true to who they are, since it's AU you are still providing ample explanation and examples of their personalities I have a feeling you would do that if you were writing a canon story also.
I'm excited to see what all is going to go wrong. Kidnappings never seem to go as planned and I can't wait to see what more can go wrong.
I do have to ask, what is a Publix?
I can't seem to stop reading the story though I shouldn't be on the internet so much since work doesn't "allow" it, but the story has me sucked in.
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I do have to ask, what is a Publix?
It's a grocery store. I like to be accurate as far as the stores in the regions where the story takes place lol I suppose that something I wrote nowadays I probably would have mentioned that but SS is a throwback! Glad you're enjoying it even if it's on work time lol
Edit: I forgot where I had even mentioned it so I went back and now I see it lol
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I'm reading 00Carter and I decided to respond to each chapter with a story review, but to give my analysis on each episode arc here. So I just finished the first three chapters "Carter... Nick Carter."
So far this arc was basically an introduction to the characters and the agency as a whole. In it we have Nick creating a ridiculous mission for himself to solve. We later learn that is out of boredom as he's been suspended from any real missions for some reason that has not yet been explained.
I thought the character introductions were done well as Nick went around and interrogated each one I felt like I was able to remember who was who and what their role in the agency is. Sometimes when you have stories with 10+ characters it can get confusing, but so far I am good. I also feel like I have a good sense of Nick's character throughout his actions in these past few chapters. So far he strikes me as the kind of agent who may not be the most skillful, but somehow always comes out on top somehow, although I'm sure a lot of the times it is by accident.
As far as any real Con Crit goes the only minor nitpicky thing that I noticed was a continuity error between Chapters 2 and 3 about what Nick was wearing. In Chapter 2 when he is in the elevator with Diamond you mention he is wearing a tie, but in Chapter 3 he is wearing a "snug black shirt and casual jean attire." Not a huge deal I know but for some reason I notice those minor details.
I am intrigued to keep reading and find out about Nick's next mission as well as how his last one went wrong.
Thanks for the great feedback, Mel! Glad you are liking it so far and are able to keep the characters straight - that's impressive, considering there are so many of them!
This first episode isn't our favorite, 1) because it really is just an introductory episode, not much action, and 2) because the writing feels a lot choppier than our later episodes. We still had 11 writers on the first episode, and that's a lot of people to get on the same page LOL. We were still getting a feel for the characters and style of the story ourselves, not to mention each other as writers, in the first few episodes, so they are not nearly as strong as the later ones (Episode 4 and on), when we had gotten into our groove. Thanks for mentioning the continuity error with the clothes; I'm supposed to be the one who puts everything together and proofreads to catch stuff like that, and I have never noticed that! I'll have to fix that. :)
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Visions of Love by alota_cookin
Good so far but I wouldn't have the girls go 'off track' so much. Can't say to much through cause I just started.
Just a heads up...they ALL do it in this story, not just the girls. They are very random characters. LOL
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And I'm to like chapter 20 of It Stays With You.
I go from being sick to my stomach...to snickering...t o crying...to upset and angry...then back again. I can't really find much to critique about the story...I think it flows well and the characters have depth. I can't stand blood and guts kind of stuff (I even pass out, half the time, when I see real blood, LOL) but the story has me so hooked that I can't stop reading. Unfortunately I have to stop until I get back from my trip tho. Admittedly, I never EVER would have even thought about reading this, but I'm enjoying it...in a love/hate relationship kinda way. LMAO!
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I like the sound of that story Kris, I'm going to read it even though it's not on my list :)
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I started reading It Stays With You last night, but only reviewed on the chapters. Thought I would post something on the thread.
This is definitely not something I usually read, because it's creepy and about Brian. But I have to say that it's well written and the cliffhangers just keep you coming back. I also like the smooth transitions from his dreams to what I think is reality. Plus the bond between Nick and Brian is what I imagine it was back then!
Uh...ok I shall read some more later tonight.
Thanks Erika! It was a challenge for me to write a Brian story lol
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And I'm to like chapter 20 of It Stays With You.
I go from being sick to my stomach...to snickering...t o crying...to upset and angry...then back again. I can't really find much to critique about the story...I think it flows well and the characters have depth. I can't stand blood and guts kind of stuff (I even pass out, half the time, when I see real blood, LOL) but the story has me so hooked that I can't stop reading. Unfortunately I have to stop until I get back from my trip tho. Admittedly, I never EVER would have even thought about reading this, but I'm enjoying it...in a love/hate relationship kinda way. LMAO!
LOL thanks Kristal! Take a nice well deserved break from the madness that is my mind and enjoy yourself. I can't believe you are already on chapter 20! You guys are all doing a great job with reading..
I can say that I haven't read this much fanfic in a long time, between October Road, and Rose's and Steph's updates. It' kind of nice..
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Ok so I made it through the first 5 Chapters of Games. I must say I am intrigued by whatever it is attacking people. I really enjoyed the first chapter, kind of like the calm before the storm. I can't wait to see what is with the video game and attacking people. I am enjoying the story so far and now I am curious about the Supernatural show, I kind of want to watch now!
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So read the first two chapters for Ice Cold Blood. Interesting start. Hope to find out how she got hurt soon.
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^ good! I'm glad you're liking it so far, Kristal. Hope you don't have nightmares, i'll feel bad. LOL
I'm going to wait a few more chapters before I post my thoughts on October Road, but i'm enjoying it so far. :) and like I told Sapphire, being this is an AU AJ romance with none of the other guys in sight, this was going to be a real challenge for me. I mean, no one even gets a little hurt or turns evil? lol
No one is evil or hurt... for now. LOL
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The story is great Kristal my only minor nitpicky that I noticed is the characters can get confusing,Like when AJ/Howie fight about the fish.
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I'm reading "My Answer is You" by Rachel (colorguard_div a). I've read the first six chapters so far. It's a Brian story, so I'm enjoying that.
There are a lot of things about it that make me think of old-school fanfics, the kind of stories I loved to read back in the day when I first got addicted to fanfic - the fact that it's set in Kentucky, at Brian's parents' house; Brian and Nick being close friends who play basketball together; the lack of real life wives/girlfriends. It's the kind of story that could have been written at any time and could take place in any time; there aren't those details that limit it to a certain era.
I kind of like that instead of being a story about two people falling in love, it's a story about two people who were in love, but had a falling out. Because it takes place after the fact, there is a lot of back story that comes into play, and I like how it's revealed slowly... it's frustrating to me at times, because I want to know the whole story, but it also has me asking a lot of questions and wanting to read on to find out the answers.
From a writing standpoint, the story is well-written and easy to read because it uses a lot of dialogue and short, simple sentences. It's clear and descriptive enough without being overly wordy, and the clipped sentences add to the feeling of tension that has dominated the chapters I've read so far.
The only thing that I find gets in the way of the flow of the story for me as I'm reading is the point of view. I wish it was either solely first person, meaning Josie is the narrator, and the reader only has insight to her thoughts and things she would know, or all in third person, so that both Josie's and Brian's thoughts can be revealed, but neither one of them is telling the story. I just find it distracting that Josie's telling the story, and then all of a sudden there's a paragraph or a scene showing Brian's or his parents' thoughts, when Josie couldn't know what's really on their minds. That's just me, though; Jodi Picoult does that in her books, too, and it bugs me just as much, even though I like her writing otherwise.
I've been leaving reaction reviews at the end of every chapter, so I'll read and review a few more chapters tomorrow and be back with more of my overall thoughts.
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Okay so I just read chapters 6 to 11 and have finished reading Games. I loved the overall storyline and concept was very interesting... however I found myself feeling lost by lack of background information and that more description could have added more to the story. I have left feedback on every chapter but to me the ending came a bit quickly and I found myself unsatisfied. I did enjoy reading it a lot!
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Julie,
Thanks for the good words about the story and the feedback.
I get what you are saying about the point of view in the story. I know that is an issue for me in a few of my stories. I think it's because I want people to get both Josie and Brian's perspective on the situation.
I picked Kentucky as the setting because I wanted Josie and Brian to be "home". Kentucky is their place. The friendship started in there and I wanted to begin their new life there.
I can't wait to hear what else you have to say.
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I'm really loving this challenge. I think it is great to get constructive criticism about your story and writing. It's great to see what someone truly thinks about it, because a lot of times we don't really get those in reviews.
Julie pointed out something in my story that she wasn't fond of (point of view) and it made realize that yeah, it's something I want to work on for a future story. Having her point it out got me thinking. Sometimes we get into ruts with our writing and do the same thing over and over. We want to change it. but we don't because when we start a new story we just write. Now I want to make a bigger effort to write in first person for a whole story or third person. So, I'm excited that Julie helped me to remember that I want to write in a different point of view, so that all my stories aren' t the same.
I also like that I get to explain the why's of my writing. I am big into finding out why. I love to learn how movies were made, why a song was written. I need that personal connection. I get to do that and I love it. It helps me to understand myself as a writer.
Smiles for all of you :) :D ;D 8-) :crazy: :P
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Wow, i'm going to have to get that final survey together faster than I thought I would. For those of you done already, feel free to read the other stories that were on your lists. I agree with you Rachel, I think it's so refreshing to get people's opinions on things especially from someone you know wouldn't have read it otherwise. So many times, we tend to have the same regular reviewers and they tend to not read into as much as someone who maybe is reading your work for the very first time.
I love this challenge. I think we need to make it an annual event!
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Julie,
Thanks for the good words about the story and the feedback.
I get what you are saying about the point of view in the story. I know that is an issue for me in a few of my stories. I think it's because I want people to get both Josie and Brian's perspective on the situation.
I picked Kentucky as the setting because I wanted Josie and Brian to be "home". Kentucky is their place. The friendship started in there and I wanted to begin their new life there.
I can't wait to hear what else you have to say.
No problem! :)
With the point of view, I've had the same dilemma. Usually I write in third person, which makes it possible to show both characters' perspectives, just without them narrating the story. With Curtain Call, I really wanted to tell it in first person, but also show both sides of the story, so I alternate between the two main characters' points of view each chapter. That's not usually my favorite way of doing it, but I think it works for that story, and it's always fun to try something new.
That makes sense why you chose Kentucky for the setting. I like it; it takes me back to the good old days. :)
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I just feel like reading everything on the list lol I am always looking for something to read!
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I'm really loving this challenge. I think it is great to get constructive criticism about your story and writing. It's great to see what someone truly thinks about it, because a lot of times we don't really get those in reviews.
Julie pointed out something in my story that she wasn't fond of (point of view) and it made realize that yeah, it's something I want to work on for a future story. Having her point it out got me thinking. Sometimes we get into ruts with our writing and do the same thing over and over. We want to change it. but we don't because when we start a new story we just write. Now I want to make a bigger effort to write in first person for a whole story or third person. So, I'm excited that Julie helped me to remember that I want to write in a different point of view, so that all my stories aren' t the same.
I also like that I get to explain the why's of my writing. I am big into finding out why. I love to learn how movies were made, why a song was written. I need that personal connection. I get to do that and I love it. It helps me to understand myself as a writer.
Smiles for all of you :) :D ;D 8-) :crazy: :P
I agree with all of this. I welcome the constructive criticism, knowing it's coming from someone who probably wouldn't have read my story to begin with, but is giving it a chance. Since mine is a collaboration that's still in-progress, it might help us find ways to make the story appeal to a wider audience, hearing what people like and don't like about it. And we can all learn things to take with us and use in future stories, too.
It's fun to have an excuse to talk about your story without looking like an ass who's obsessed with her own story and boring everyone around her by talking about it. It's nice to see the back-and-forth conversations going on between readers and writers.
And like Mare said, it's great to get feedback from people who maybe haven't read any of your stuff and also to read something by an author whose work you've never read before. Even if everyone doesn't end up loving what they read, it's great that so many people took up the challenge to try something different.
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I'm reading 00Carter and I decided to respond to each chapter with a story review, but to give my analysis on each episode arc here. So I just finished the first three chapters "Carter... Nick Carter."
So far this arc was basically an introduction to the characters and the agency as a whole. In it we have Nick creating a ridiculous mission for himself to solve. We later learn that is out of boredom as he's been suspended from any real missions for some reason that has not yet been explained.
I thought the character introductions were done well as Nick went around and interrogated each one I felt like I was able to remember who was who and what their role in the agency is. Sometimes when you have stories with 10+ characters it can get confusing, but so far I am good. I also feel like I have a good sense of Nick's character throughout his actions in these past few chapters. So far he strikes me as the kind of agent who may not be the most skillful, but somehow always comes out on top somehow, although I'm sure a lot of the times it is by accident.
As far as any real Con Crit goes the only minor nitpicky thing that I noticed was a continuity error between Chapters 2 and 3 about what Nick was wearing. In Chapter 2 when he is in the elevator with Diamond you mention he is wearing a tie, but in Chapter 3 he is wearing a "snug black shirt and casual jean attire." Not a huge deal I know but for some reason I notice those minor details.
I am intrigued to keep reading and find out about Nick's next mission as well as how his last one went wrong.
I love seeing your thoughts on this! Especially since like Julie said, in the first episode, there were 11 of us writing it lol. That's not easy at all. So it's impressive it flows. And thanks for catching that continuity flaw! I'm in shock Julie missed it LOL. >:( (kidding... :-*)
This episode like you said, was just a way to really introduce the characters and get the setup of the agency out of the way. So that it wouldn't be hard to keep up with all the characters. :)
I love this challenge cause it brings in new perspectives.
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I posted the final survey in the second post on the first page! Those of you that are done with your stories should fill it out and post it in here! :)
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I'm so far off lol.
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Some are already done lol I think it really depends on how long your story is.
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Yeah...Casual is long lol. This'll take me some time. But it's okay cause 00Carter is pretty damn wordy too LOL.
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Yeah...Casual is long lol. This'll take me some time. But it's okay cause 00Carter is pretty damn wordy too LOL.
Sorry! :o)
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we post the survey here too?
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yes
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1) Name of the story you read and the author and what you feel the genre is. Your answer might be different then the authors.
Tooth Fairy – Carterkid
I feel that fantasy is a good fit for this story, a little bit of comedy.
2) Would you have ever read this story if it wasn't a challenge?
No, I probably would not have read this story if not for the challenge.
3) What was your favorite scene?
I like the scene where AJ gets told he has to serve his sentence as a tooth fairy.
4) Who was your favorite character and why?
I liked Alan the best. He added a nice humor to the story. The story was so short I didn't get a feel for any one character though.
5) Overall tell us one reason why you think someone else should/or shouldn't read this story.
I think if the author did a revision and fixed some of the structural errors, maybe expanded the story a bit, that this would be a cute read if you are just looking for a quick fic to read.
6) Did it convert you to the genre it is? Would you be willing to read another story just like it?
The genre does not determine whether I read a story or not. I typically go off of the summary.
7) Give one piece of concrit that might help the author for future reference. This can be positive too, concrit doesn't always mean negative.
I've said it a few times, grammar and structure. I know these weren't long chapters, they could definitely use a little more to help with the storyline, flow and character development.
8) This should be the question the author asked in their survey. Everyone's will be different.
The flow... the chapters seemed choppy and quick which affected how the story flowed for me. The structure of the chapters also gave me a little trouble and I found I had to go back and re-read parts a few times.
9) Would you recommend this story and author to another person? Why or why not
Like I said above. I think if you are looking for a cute quick read, I would recommend this fic.
10) Out of 10 stars what would you give this story?
3 – I think Carterkid has a great idea, I know it is also a crossover fic for Tooth Fairy with The Rock, but I think she could definitely take what she has, fix the structure and expand on it more and she would have a more interesting story.
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At last wohoo! Sorry for the long wait on my first review on my challenge story! But work was hectic today, anywho I did read the first two chapters of A little taste of sin and I must say that even though it does have romance I do feel it's a challenge. I rarely read Nick romance so it is hard for me. So I should start duh! okay so I think this story is very detailed each chapter that I've read so far is full of detail in what the main character is feeling. which makes me feel like I understand the choices she is making. Aside from
that and a couple of spelling errors I have to say I am intrigued and will continue to read and post more as I go. Well I should get to it it's seems some of you are already done Yikes! I Still have a lot to go!
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I started reading My Mona Lisa this morning (quiet day in work :) )
OK, I've read two chapters so far and find that it tends to jump a bit. I got confused who was who in some places and think the comma use didn't really help matters. I also find it odd that a 23 year old who comes from money would look so bad and not attempt to look nice for her new job, especially if she's the public face of the company. I would expect that more from a teenager than a 23 year old.
Anyway, I'll carry on reading and come back with more reviews as I read :)
Hey steph,
I have noted this and will definetly fix this. I was excited to know you were going to read my story as you know I am a fan of some of your work. Ok well I hope you can understand better as you go and just a tid bit here in the USA you will see adults with braces... I know it sounds weird but true. I am ready for more!
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Maybe I'm just stupid, but I'm getting a bit confused with this main character. She started off as Mona and now seems to be called either Lisa or Lizzie?
Onwards I go though! I do like the idea of AJ helping to transform her though and it's good to see that they are getting along.
Okay noted. Well her name is Mona Lisa but I see what you mean. I am taking notes Steph. :) please continue
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All finished :)
1) Name of the story you read and the author and what you feel the genre is. Your answer might be different then the authors.
Story- Games by Carter-Orange
Genre- Suspense
2) Would you have ever read this story if it wasn't a challenge?
It had been recommended to me by a friend but I never thought about reading it before.
3) What was your favorite scene?
I loved the scene of AJ and Nick running in the woods.
4) Who was your favorite character and why?
AJ....he was very funny.
5) Overall tell us one reason why you think someone else should/or shouldn't read this story.
It is a quick read and a good suspenseful and fun story if you like Backstreet Boys and Supernatural.
6) Did it convert you to the genre it is? Would you be willing to read another story just like it?
I am starting to like suspense more and am curious about the show Supernatural.
7) Give one piece of concrit that might help the author for future reference. This can be positive too, concrit doesn't always mean negative.
I felt that the story could have been longet to be honest. I also got lost a few times because I don't watch Supernatural I suppose. I did enjoy the story.
8) This should be the question the author asked in their survey. Everyone's will be different.
Steph asked if it held my interest....it most certainly did...I was hooked after Chapter 5.
9) Would you recommend this story and author to another person? Why or why not
I would definitely recommend someone to read Steph's stories....I am currently reading her new one Save A Prayer. Games was a good read too.
10) Out of 10 stars what would you give this story?
9 out of 10!!!
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Wow, thanks Tracy and glad you liked it!
I know it could've been more descriptive, more detailed and longer but that's just the way it came out of my head. I tend to type up what's in my head and post it straight away. Maybe I should take more time before posting.
You should definitely watch Supernatural. I bet you will love it!
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I said I would start reading Karah's Love This Pain yesterday but failed. Yesterday at work, I moved wrong or something and now my shoulder and neck hurt like hell. I couldn't even focus on my work, so I figured it'd be better to start reading it when it doesn't hurt that much, which is today. :)
And Tracy, you should watch Supernatural (also because there's a lot of nice eye candy hehe). I love the show. I've got 5 seasons on dvd. :)
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I am 10 chapters through October Rd so I thought i'd post some overall thoughts in here. As I said before, this isn't something i'd normally read. So I walked into it very hesitantly.
We start out with Alex who is about to leave for Julliard to pursue his dreams. His high school sweetheart Krystle was going to NY as well. We find out in the first chapter this isn't the case. I was surprised to see the next chapter jump ahead 6 years and the cute high school couple is no more. Alex is now on broadway and comes home to find his new girlfriend cheating on him. This chases him back to his house on October Road where he left Krystle all those year ago. Hence the title... lol
This is definitely a romance but there hasn't been any romance so far which kind of strays from the sterotypical.
Alex is a nice strong and likeable character and his parents are also fun to read. They have a nice family bond and Krystle (author) does a great job at showing us that. I'm not too sure how I feel about the female lead yet. Her name is also Krystle, which you know is a giant pet peeve of mine lol I want to like her but honestly her weird bond with Alex's parents kind of creeps me out. And the fact that she made his family lie about a child that isn't even Alex's (as of now anyway). I don't want to go into detail because I don't want to spoil it for anyone who may want to read.
So far, i'm enjoying it, although it is a little slow paced. There is a lot of dialogue which I tend to love but in this case, it seems to be slowing the overall plot down a bit. I do like the fact that this relationship isn't going to be a simple matter of love at second sight. The female lead seems very hesitant to get into a relationship with Alex which makes her more complex. The only thing that really should be fixed is Brian's last name. With people who are so into BSB, it might be a detraction to see Litrell instead of Littrell. Honestly, if I was just skimming through a story and saw one of their names not spelled correctly it would be enough for me to click out of the story, but then again, i'm anal. LOL
I'll be back after the next ten! :)
Good job Sapphire!
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I love seeing your thoughts on this! Especially since like Julie said, in the first episode, there were 11 of us writing it lol. That's not easy at all. So it's impressive it flows. And thanks for catching that continuity flaw! I'm in shock Julie missed it LOL. >:( (kidding... :-*)
This episode like you said, was just a way to really introduce the characters and get the setup of the agency out of the way. So that it wouldn't be hard to keep up with all the characters. :)
I love this challenge cause it brings in new perspectives.
I cannot even imagine how that possibly worked and being that there were so many authors working on it, it is not choppy and moves pretty seamlessly which is hard to accomplish with so many different writing styles. I'm actually really curious as to how you guys put it together. As someone else mentioned in this thread I also love to hear the story behind the story.
I am getting ready to read some more now that AC is back up again.
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At last wohoo! Sorry for the long wait on my first review on my challenge story! But work was hectic today, anywho I did read the first two chapters of A little taste of sin and I must say that even though it does have romance I do feel it's a challenge. I rarely read Nick romance so it is hard for me. So I should start duh! okay so I think this story is very detailed each chapter that I've read so far is full of detail in what the main character is feeling. which makes me feel like I understand the choices she is making. Aside from
that and a couple of spelling errors I have to say I am intrigued and will continue to read and post more as I go. Well I should get to it it's seems some of you are already done Yikes! I Still have a lot to go!
Thanks Summer! Take your time because I know my story is a long one. I'm glad that you find the details in the story helpful especially in the beginning. It is actually a sequel, but I tried to introduce as much backstory in the beginning so that a new reader did not necessarily need to read the first story to enjoy this one.
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I cannot even imagine how that possibly worked and being that there were so many authors working on it, it is not choppy and moves pretty seamlessly which is hard to accomplish with so many different writing styles. I'm actually really curious as to how you guys put it together. As someone else mentioned in this thread I also love to hear the story behind the story.
I am getting ready to read some more now that AC is back up again.
Thanks! Looking back, I'm not sure how we did either LOL. Most of us didn't know each other very well; the whole idea was conceived here on this forum, and Rose took whoever signed up for it. Luckily, almost all of the eleven turned out to be good writers, and that's probably the only reason it flows as well as it does in the first episode or two, because we were still getting to know each other and figure out the tone of the story.
The way we've always written it is, we get together in a big group chat to plan out each episode; Rose organizes our ideas into an outline, which she posts online for everyone to see; the outline is divided into specific scenes or parts, and everyone claims a part to write. We usually wait our turn and write the episode in order, which helps to keep the flow and not leave big gaps. It works out pretty well; the only problem we have is if someone takes forever to write their part, it holds the rest of us up, and that's why we only update once in a blue moon. But it's a lot of fun, and I don't think it's a story one person - not me, anyway LOL - could have pulled off on her own. It takes all of us putting our heads together to make it work. Thanks for asking! :)
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finished stockholm syndrome. I will fill out the survey when I get home.
I had a hard time making notes of anything just because I was too into the story. Only very minor "spelling/incorrect word" errors but really nothing more then I have in my own.
I am glad I read this, it was a great distraction and a fantastic read.
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I am 10 chapters through October Rd so I thought i'd post some overall thoughts in here. As I said before, this isn't something i'd normally read. So I walked into it very hesitantly.
We start out with Alex who is about to leave for Julliard to pursue his dreams. His high school sweetheart Krystle was going to NY as well. We find out in the first chapter this isn't the case. I was surprised to see the next chapter jump ahead 6 years and the cute high school couple is no more. Alex is now on broadway and comes home to find his new girlfriend cheating on him. This chases him back to his house on October Road where he left Krystle all those year ago. Hence the title... lol
This is definitely a romance but there hasn't been any romance so far which kind of strays from the sterotypical.
Alex is a nice strong and likeable character and his parents are also fun to read. They have a nice family bond and Krystle (author) does a great job at showing us that. I'm not too sure how I feel about the female lead yet. Her name is also Krystle, which you know is a giant pet peeve of mine lol I want to like her but honestly her weird bond with Alex's parents kind of creeps me out. And the fact that she made his family lie about a child that isn't even Alex's (as of now anyway). I don't want to go into detail because I don't want to spoil it for anyone who may want to read.
So far, i'm enjoying it, although it is a little slow paced. There is a lot of dialogue which I tend to love but in this case, it seems to be slowing the overall plot down a bit. I do like the fact that this relationship isn't going to be a simple matter of love at second sight. The female lead seems very hesitant to get into a relationship with Alex which makes her more complex. The only thing that really should be fixed is Brian's last name. With people who are so into BSB, it might be a detraction to see Litrell instead of Littrell. Honestly, if I was just skimming through a story and saw one of their names not spelled correctly it would be enough for me to click out of the story, but then again, i'm anal. LOL
I'll be back after the next ten! :)
Good job Sapphire!
I'm glad you like it so far. The relationship between Alex and his parents was important to me. I wanted him to be close to both of them so I"m glad that comes across well. AS for as her relationship with them, hopefully that will be more understood later on and not seem so "creepy." In chapter 5 she explains to him why she didn't want them to tell him. She was ashamed of hereslf. But she will explain that more in the future as well. Thank you for your comments.
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I'm glad you like it so far. The relationship between Alex and his parents was important to me. I wanted him to be close to both of them so I"m glad that comes across well. AS for as her relationship with them, hopefully that will be more understood later on and not seem so "creepy." In chapter 5 she explains to him why she didn't want them to tell him. She was ashamed of hereslf. But she will explain that more in the future as well. Thank you for your comments.
No problem! I'm looking forward to see why their bond (Krystle and Alex's parents) is so strong despite her and Alex not being a couple for so long. I know she explained in chapter 5, I just didn't think it was a good enough explaination considering it had nothing to do with Alex really and more just her own issue.
That's a good thing because I felt passionate about it so whether it was meant for us to like or not like her, she brought out a feeling in me. If she was one dimensional, I wouldn't care one way or the other.
Looking forward to see how it all unfolds. :)
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I've read up through Chapter 10 of "My Answer Is You" now, and I liked this set of chapters because they were revealing; I got a lot of information I'd been wanting and answers to my questions. I'm more into the story and feel like I have a better understanding of the characters and their relationship now. Both Brian and Josie are flawed, which I like. Brian, at times, is a womanizing douche, and Josie is kind of a drama queen who seems to run away rather than deal with problems head-on, but it wouldn't be much of a story if they were both perfect and happily in love LOL. Now I have new questions about which direction the story will go. Will Josie rekindle her relationship with Brian, or will she start a new one with Nick, the sole voice of reason? I like that you're keeping me guessing, Rachel! I'll read more tomorrow.
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This was NOT my story but I finished it and thought I'd fill out the survey for it as well.
1) Name of the story you read and the author and what you feel the genre is. Your answer might be different then the authors.
Stockholm Syndrome – Julilly
Definitely AU with some Action, her categories are good.
2) Would you have ever read this story if it wasn't a challenge?
I didn't know about the story until the challenge, so probably not.
3) What was your favorite scene?
I like the scene where you find out why Brian and Nick have the relationship they have, the backstory for them.
4) Who was your favorite character and why?
Actually, Brian. I liked how you could see that he was really a jerk but there was that undertone of friendship towards Nick. That he felt he needed to be there and help him (well help him in the jerky ways he calls help)
5) Overall tell us one reason why you think someone else should/or shouldn't read this story.
I think everyone should read this story whether this is their genre of choice or not. The characters are good, and it's a “page turner”.
6) Did it convert you to the genre it is? Would you be willing to read another story just like it?
I would definitely read another Julily's story now that I've read this one.
7) Give one piece of concrit that might help the author for future reference. This can be positive too, concrit doesn't always mean negative.
I think AU is your forte just based off this story. You did a great job with the character development so we knew who they were in this story.
8) This should be the question the author asked in their survey. Everyone's will be different.
Does it suck? Well yah, of course it does ;) Was I able to properly picture the boys in their roles. I had no issues with Howie or AJ, I pictured them right away. Nick being such a pushover took me a chapter or two to get used to and then I could picture him easily. Brian, honestly, took me a little longer but I enjoyed the change for him. Instead of being the southern, God fearing boy he is he's a little twisted evil doer. I liked it.
9) Would you recommend this story and author to another person? Why or why not
I would recommend it to anyone asking my opinion of a story to read, whether they read AU or not. I couldn't stop reading it. The plot was well played out and the characters were described well.
10) Out of 10 stars what would you give this story?
10
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Wow! Thanks Lore!! *blushes* I'm really glad you enjoyed it! :)
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Thanks! Looking back, I'm not sure how we did either LOL. Most of us didn't know each other very well; the whole idea was conceived here on this forum, and Rose took whoever signed up for it. Luckily, almost all of the eleven turned out to be good writers, and that's probably the only reason it flows as well as it does in the first episode or two, because we were still getting to know each other and figure out the tone of the story.
The way we've always written it is, we get together in a big group chat to plan out each episode; Rose organizes our ideas into an outline, which she posts online for everyone to see; the outline is divided into specific scenes or parts, and everyone claims a part to write. We usually wait our turn and write the episode in order, which helps to keep the flow and not leave big gaps. It works out pretty well; the only problem we have is if someone takes forever to write their part, it holds the rest of us up, and that's why we only update once in a blue moon. But it's a lot of fun, and I don't think it's a story one person - not me, anyway LOL - could have pulled off on her own. It takes all of us putting our heads together to make it work. Thanks for asking! :)
I vaguely remember you guys coming up with the idea here, but I remember not really getting involved because it just didn't seem like my thing. I know you started with 11 but just out of curiosity how many writers are currently working on 00Carter?
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^ There are 5 writer's left. I recently bowed out because my heart just wasn't in it anymore. The girls are a great group though so the story will continue to be just as awesome (cause they aren't losing much in me)
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I vaguely remember you guys coming up with the idea here, but I remember not really getting involved because it just didn't seem like my thing. I know you started with 11 but just out of curiosity how many writers are currently working on 00Carter?
I'll answer this one.
As of right now, there's just five of us. Lore just quit the story but we gained a new writer who'll be writing the next episode with us. We've gone through so many writers, which is another part of the problem. I feel like there's a lot of good ideas that go into this, that may never be seen cause of that.
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Finished chapters 4-7 of 00Carter and the episode arc "Idolize Me."
This arc was very entertaining with Nick's mission involving him and his partner Diamond auditioning for an American Idolesque reality TV show in order to stop an enemy from using the TV show as a platform for worldwide destruction. I thought that Julie, Rose, and the rest of the girls did an awesome job parodying Randy, Simon, and Paula down to the tone of their voices. It was also nice to see a little more backstory revealed although I still have plenty of questions.
Some scenes were very vague to the point where I was confused about who exactly were talking in the scenes. I had to read things a few times over and still was not sure if I had gotten it. Julie explained to me though that this was intentional, so I am sure that it will all make sense in the next episode. I knew that was unlike Julie and Rose to leave things so open LOL.
My only Con Crit is that in this episode it is a little less seamless and you can sometimes see where other authors came in. Also I felt that in the audition scenes all of the lyrics were not necessarily needed. I can't wait to read more and clear some of my burning questions up.
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I'll answer this one.
As of right now, there's just five of us. Lore just quit the story but we gained a new writer who'll be writing the next episode with us. We've gone through so many writers, which is another part of the problem. I feel like there's a lot of good ideas that go into this, that may never be seen cause of that.
Yea I can see where that could be hard, but kudos to you girls for working through it!
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Finished chapters 4-7 of 00Carter and the episode arc "Idolize Me."
This arc was very entertaining with Nick's mission involving him and his partner Diamond auditioning for an American Idolesque reality TV show in order to stop an enemy from using the TV show as a platform for worldwide destruction. I thought that Julie, Rose, and the rest of the girls did an awesome job parodying Randy, Simon, and Paula down to the tone of their voices. It was also nice to see a little more backstory revealed although I still have plenty of questions.
Some scenes were very vague to the point where I was confused about who exactly were talking in the scenes. I had to read things a few times over and still was not sure if I had gotten it. Julie explained to me though that this was intentional, so I am sure that it will all make sense in the next episode. I knew that was unlike Julie and Rose to leave things so open LOL.
My only Con Crit is that in this episode it is a little less seamless and you can sometimes see where other authors came in. Also I felt that in the audition scenes all of the lyrics were not necessarily needed. I can't wait to read more and clear some of my burning questions up.
I'm glad you pointed out the vagueness. Like Julie said, that was actually intentional. This was during our "Lets try to keep it somewhat short phase" LOL. Which...didn't last long LMAO. We wanted people to be wondering...is this them, is this someone else...who is it? Which you're right, isn't like us lol. Hopefully the next episode answers everything, I'm really curious to see if it actually does.
Thanks about pointing out some of the seamlessness. I feel like it shows a lot in episodes 2 and 3, and (hopefully) I feel like we got it together in Ice, Ice, Baby, which is episode 4.
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Casual - impressions by Chapter 3.
So far the story seems to be setting up quite nicely. Now this is a preference thing, the dialogue moves slow for me. I'm a reader who prefers tags after speaking only when necessary so that my eyes can follow the dialogue quickly. But like I said, that's a personal taste thing.
Not sure if the flashback was necessary, immediately after the sex chapter. I mean as a reader, I already know they had sex, and that she enjoyed every minute of it lol. The flashback just repeats the necessary.
I also, doubt a little bit the believability of Quinn not having recognized Nick at all. Any girl who grew up at the time Nick was famous (which would be the case here) would've seen Nick plastered everywhere in the media.
I do think you get across the characters quite well. In two chapters I do have a very definite sense of Quinn and who she is. A lot of writers can't do that, especially in romance. So I'm happy to see that in here. :)
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I'm glad you pointed out the vagueness. Like Julie said, that was actually intentional. This was during our "Lets try to keep it somewhat short phase" LOL. Which...didn't last long LMAO. We wanted people to be wondering...is this them, is this someone else...who is it? Which you're right, isn't like us lol. Hopefully the next episode answers everything, I'm really curious to see if it actually does.
Ok good! I wasn't sure if it was just me skimming over something important because I definitely had to reread those parts two or three times. I pretty much knew it was Pearl and AJ but some parts I was thinking "Wait? Is there ANOTHER pair of agents from another agency spying on Nick and Diamond?"
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Finished chapters 4-7 of 00Carter and the episode arc "Idolize Me."
This arc was very entertaining with Nick's mission involving him and his partner Diamond auditioning for an American Idolesque reality TV show in order to stop an enemy from using the TV show as a platform for worldwide destruction. I thought that Julie, Rose, and the rest of the girls did an awesome job parodying Randy, Simon, and Paula down to the tone of their voices. It was also nice to see a little more backstory revealed although I still have plenty of questions.
Some scenes were very vague to the point where I was confused about who exactly were talking in the scenes. I had to read things a few times over and still was not sure if I had gotten it. Julie explained to me though that this was intentional, so I am sure that it will all make sense in the next episode. I knew that was unlike Julie and Rose to leave things so open LOL.
My only Con Crit is that in this episode it is a little less seamless and you can sometimes see where other authors came in. Also I felt that in the audition scenes all of the lyrics were not necessarily needed. I can't wait to read more and clear some of my burning questions up.
Thanks for the great feedback, Mel! I'm glad you thought the Global Idol stuff was entertaining. Oddly enough, none of us are very into James Bond either, so even though that's where the concept of the story came from, it's only a loose parody. We've included a lot of pop culture stuff and taken it in our own, random direction LOL.
I totally agree with you on the issue of seamlessness. When I look back on the first two or three episodes, they feel awkward to me, too. I think it's just the downside of trying to write with so many people without having a solid style for the story down yet. We all had different writing styles, and a couple of our authors didn't speak English as a first language, so trying to get it all to flow together was tough. I think the later episodes definitely flow better because we had fewer writers trying to mesh, and we had established the universe and style of the story. I'll be interested to know if you agree once you get further into the story.
I agree on the lyrics too - I reread some of the episode today when I was responding to your reviews, and I definitely found myself skimming through those scenes.
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Ok good! I wasn't sure if it was just me skimming over something important because I definitely had to reread those parts two or three times. I pretty much knew it was Pearl and AJ but some parts I was thinking "Wait? Is there ANOTHER pair of agents from another agency spying on Nick and Diamond?"
Nope, not you. Looking back, some of it comes across awkward. But at least it got you asking the right question... :) LOL
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I'm up to Chapter 8 of My Mona Lisa now so thought I'd do a review.
Although I do like the story (I love the whole Cinderalla thing), there are quite a few instances of bad grammar. Some of the sentences are written in a way which don't flow or make a lot of sense until you read them back. It's a bit jumpy in places too and you don't always know which character's point of view you are reading from until you get further into the paragraph.
I like that she finally decided to get a life of her own, but couldn't picture her being a party animal for 6 months when she is that shy. I also don't like how her friend Gilbert suddenly turned into an asshole, it should've been more gradual I think. I also think 6 months of being unemployed is a long time for someone who went to New York with the intention of making something of her life.
Good to see she has a possible romance on the cards with the taxi driver though.
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by now, everyone should have started reading their stories, so if you haven't, try to get on it! LOL I've been checking your feedback and for the most part, a lot of you have stepped up but i'm still not seeing some on some of the stories. So, hopefully that will change soon. :) With the exception of Steph who is reading two, everyone only has one story to worry about.
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I've been out of town but I plan to start today!
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I'm up to Chapter 13 now and have to admit that at times, I'm finding it tough to read. It's taking me a while to read because it just isn't holding my attention as much as I'd like. There seems to be lots of things going on at once, like AJ and Sarah getting married but he's in love with his therapist who is in an unhappy marriage. Mona/Lisa/Lizzie is suddenly a success after a meeting with some guy Denise recommended.
I would drop the Lizzie name and probably call her Lis if I had to shorten her name, as it makes more sense if her name is Lisa. Well actually, her name is Ramona, so I'd just stick to that.
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I hope you aren't offended by my reviews, I don't mean to offend, I'm just pointing things out which would make it more reader friendly :)
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I expected to read Julilly's story last night, didn't expect my day yesterday would start off with hot boys five minutes after getting on the interstate, being honked at by the knight brothers and they almost made me hit a truck of watermelons. Jon's tweet was about me yesterday LMFAO!
I'm leaving to go home tomorrow so I will then! Got VIP and concert and Donnie's after party tonight!
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Sounds like fun!
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I have another question to add to that survey for people who are reading stories that are not complete. Do you think after you are done reading what's there so far (and you only have to read however many chapters are there when the start of this challenge was given) Do you think you will continue to read the story through to the end to see what happens to the characters?
And for those of you reading completed stories, if there was a sequel, would you be curious enough to continue reading on?
I know some stories, neither question applies but I thought it would be a good one to ask.
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I'm on chapter 20 now. Lisa's loving boyfriend just picked up a woman called Jenny in his taxi and then next thing we know, he's waking up in bed with her after a boozed up night. He tells her he's got a girlfriend and is not interested and she swears revenge. She's somehow got his phone and the next day Lisa calls his phone, only to hear how he's cheated on her.
AJ consoles her, then Marco shows up and says he's sorry. But obviously she's pissed off with him and tells him where to go.
Still a lot of mistakes and the story still doesn't flow as well as it could, but it's got it's good points too.
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1) Name of the story you read and the author and what you feel the genre is. Your answer might be different then the authors.
My Mona Lisa by Summer03. I'd say this is romance rather than romance/dramedy. I thought dramedy was comedy and drama, there was no comedy in this story.
2) Would you have ever read this story if it wasn't a challenge?
I would've read the first couple of chapters and then clicked away due to the way it confuses the reader at times.
3) What was your favorite scene?
I liked it when they finally realised they were meant to be together.
4) Who was your favorite character and why?
I suppose I'll go for AJ because the other characters I couldn't really get a feel for them.
5) Overall tell us one reason why you think someone else should/or shouldn't read this story.
If you like pure romance with a nice happy ending then you might like it. If you're picky about spellings and grammar and the flow of a story then this isn't for you.
6) Did it convert you to the genre it is? Would you be willing to read another story just like it?
I already like romance.
7) Give one piece of concrit that might help the author for future reference. This can be positive too, concrit doesn't always mean negative.
I would say to edit before posting. I liked the whole idea of the plain girl getting her man in the end, but it could've come across a lot better.
8) This should be the question the author asked in their survey. Everyone's will be different.
It was kind of predictable, but then predictable doesn't mean it's a bad thing.
9) Would you recommend this story and author to another person? Why or why not
I hate this question, as I feel bad for saying what I'm going to say. No, I wouldn't recommend this story. I know Summer03 has written better, I enjoyed Seduction and don't recall it having the issues this one had with the grammar and flow.
10) Out of 10 stars what would you give this story?
Sorry again, but I'll give it 5
Now I feel like a major bitch, but I had to be honest.
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I'm going to read more later tongiht. promise.
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I'm up through Chapter 15 of "My Answer Is You." I enjoyed this latest set of chapters because the main characters hit a major turning point in their relationship, yet there was some juiciness and drama, too. I don't want to give too much away, so I'll stop there with the plot.
The characters in this story are solid. They frustrate me sometimes because they act in ways I wouldn't, but even though I don't always agree with their decisions, I can understand the motivation behind them because of the way they've been developed.
I have a question for you, Rachel: As you were writing this, did you tend to relate more to Josie or to Brian or to both equally? Which character did you enjoy writing the most?
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Casual Thoughts - Chapter Four
Question...So Quinn's writing in the story, these are columns and not blogs? One thing about them, is that they read to me like like a livejournal blog. I'm not sure if that's what you intended, but that's how they come across. I could also be looking at it the wrong way, not sure.
They're really good for getting her voice into the story. Since this is 3rd person and all, I do like how it finds a way get her telling of the story in.
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I'm up through Chapter 15 of "My Answer Is You." I enjoyed this latest set of chapters because the main characters hit a major turning point in their relationship, yet there was some juiciness and drama, too. I don't want to give too much away, so I'll stop there with the plot.
The characters in this story are solid. They frustrate me sometimes because they act in ways I wouldn't, but even though I don't always agree with their decisions, I can understand the motivation behind them because of the way they've been developed.
I have a question for you, Rachel: As you were writing this, did you tend to relate more to Josie or to Brian or to both equally? Which character did you enjoy writing the most?
Julie,your questions really made me think. I think in different parts of the story I related to Josie and in other parts Brian. I think this is why I tend to write what both were thinking. I tend to feel for both characters at times. Both have valid points and at other times they make me furious. In the end, I think I related more to Josie.
I had fun writing Brian because I got to show him as less than perfect. That presented me with a challenge, especially writing about Brian for the first time.
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Okay so I read chapters 3-6 of Ice Cold Blood. It explains how the Boys became vampires. Which was a good explanation but it didn't explain how the first Boy, the one who changed the others, became a vampire. Kinda wondering if that will come out later on.
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I'm reading Room 438. I've read the first 6 chapters. The first few chapters moved slow for me, but chapters five and six moved faster and it's setting the main part of the storyline.
Kevin and Danielle's relationship seems a little strained when they are together. More on her part then Kevin's.
I like that their are two people stalking definitely makes it more exciting, especially since one is close to Danielle. I didn't see that comimg.
I'm looking forward to reading more.
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Casual Thoughts - Chapter Four
Question...So Quinn's writing in the story, these are columns and not blogs? One thing about them, is that they read to me like like a livejournal blog. I'm not sure if that's what you intended, but that's how they come across. I could also be looking at it the wrong way, not sure.
They're really good for getting her voice into the story. Since this is 3rd person and all, I do like how it finds a way get her telling of the story in.
No, they aren't livejounal blogs...they post on a website but also run as columns in the LA Times. Maybe i didn't do a good enough job conveying that. I have been meaning to reply to your comments but I really never login on a real computer usually my phone. The columns are very important, they are where you see the real Quinn.
I'm really ready for you to get further in, everytime I go back and read the beginning I cringe and I wrote it. I cam only imagine how much it sucks for someone who isn't into this genre. Thank you for the fair feedback, I appreciate it!
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Julie,your questions really made me think. I think in different parts of the story I related to Josie and in other parts Brian. I think this is why I tend to write what both were thinking. I tend to feel for both characters at times. Both have valid points and at other times they make me furious. In the end, I think I related more to Josie.
I had fun writing Brian because I got to show him as less than perfect. That presented me with a challenge, especially writing about Brian for the first time.
That's how I feel as a reader too; I can see both sides of it, and yet they both infuriate me sometimes LOL. I'm liking them more after this last set of chapters, now that they've started communicating with each other better.
This is new for me, reading a story where Brian is not written as the boy-next-door nice guy. He's a womanizer! LOL I bet that was a challenge for you, but it does make the story more interesting and gives me some more sympathy for Josie, seeing that a lot of the drama is his fault.
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No, they aren't livejounal blogs...they post on a website but also run as columns in the LA Times. Maybe i didn't do a good enough job conveying that. I have been meaning to reply to your comments but I really never login on a real computer usually my phone. The columns are very important, they are where you see the real Quinn.
I'm really ready for you to get further in, everytime I go back and read the beginning I cringe and I wrote it. I cam only imagine how much it sucks for someone who isn't into this genre. Thank you for the fair feedback, I appreciate it!
Okay, I think it's the Mood and Music on there, it immediately made me think of LJ lol. Not so much the blog itself. I do agree the columns showcase the character's voice a bit. I'm a big character person, so I love that lol.
I'm sorry I'm not that far into the story yet, between work, writing, etc. I haven't had as much time as I'd liked. On my days off, I'm positive I'll get further along quicker. :)
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Okay, I think it's the Mood and Music on there, it immediately made me think of LJ lol. Not so much the blog itself. I do agree the columns showcase the character's voice a bit. I'm a big character person, so I love that lol.
I'm sorry I'm not that far into the story yet, between work, writing, etc. I haven't had as much time as I'd liked. On my days off, I'm positive I'll get further along quicker. :)
I'm honestly not sure why I put the mood, etc on there. I think initially I did it to help separate the columns from the rest of the story, then I liked to have a song to hit where Quinn was at...tried to do the same with the chapter titles, I started doing that to maybe hint at what was under the surface. I started this story a long time ago and it took 2+ years to write so I have asked myself why I did a lot if things I did in the beginning. I made a promise to myself not to go back...ha!
You got stuck with a long story...I think you are doing pretty darn good on your reading!!!
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I'm honestly not sure why I put the mood, etc on there. I think initially I did it to help separate the columns from the rest of the story, then I liked to have a song to hit where Quinn was at...tried to do the same with the chapter titles, I started doing that to maybe hint at what was under the surface. I started this story a long time ago and it took 2+ years to write so I have asked myself why I did a lot if things I did in the beginning. I made a promise to myself not to go back...ha!
You got stuck with a long story...I think you are doing pretty darn good on your reading!!!
I'm guilty of using songs to hit where a character is at lol. I've gotten better about it, but I get that. You know, I just read Chapter 5, when did you write that chapter? I found it hit pretty well where Nick's at now. Only now he likes the gym more LOL.
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I'm guilty of using songs to hit where a character is at lol. I've gotten better about it, but I get that. You know, I just read Chapter 5, when did you write that chapter? I found it hit pretty well where Nick's at now. Only now he likes the gym more LOL.
I started this story in 2008, I think? Lol...this Nick is Julilly's post pothead Nick...ha!
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I started this story in 2008, I think? Lol...this Nick is Julilly's post pothead Nick...ha!
LMAO.
You nailed him pretty well, especially seeng how he is now, 3 years later. :)
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I started this story in 2008, I think? Lol...this Nick is Julilly's post pothead Nick...ha!
Post pothead Nick, I like it lol
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LMAO.
You nailed him pretty well, especially seeng how he is now, 3 years later. :)
Thanks!!!
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I'm reading Room 438. I've read the first 6 chapters. The first few chapters moved slow for me, but chapters five and six moved faster and it's setting the main part of the storyline.
Kevin and Danielle's relationship seems a little strained when they are together. More on her part then Kevin's.
I like that their are two people stalking definitely makes it more exciting, especially since one is close to Danielle. I didn't see that comimg.
I'm looking forward to reading more.
This is one of the first stories I wrote where the girl and a guy had a relationship before the story started. I will admit I am awkward with writing relationships between guys and girls in general. It is definitely something I'm trying to improve. Thanks for the comments.
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Julie, for some reason I seem to give Brian flaws. He is the sweet guy, but does things that aren't so boy- next door. Even in the current story I'm writing he's flawed, even more so, but not as in your face.
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I've made a start on You Give Love A Bad Name and so far, I'm enjoying it. Nick and Tracy have just got married, but I sense that trouble is ahead and I can't wait to see what that is :)
It's well written and to the point, which makes it easy for the reader to follow.
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Thank you Steph!!! I put myself in the story but you will see what happens to me lol. I am not the main character. Glad you like it!
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I'm on Chapter 18 now. It could do with being a bit more descriptive in places, but it's a nice quick and easy read. I think Amanda should've had someone cover for her at the club so that she could take some maternity leave. In reality, there is no way you'd go straight back to work after giving birth. But in fiction I suppose anything is possible!
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I can see what you mean, Steph. Amanda is the owner/boss so I didn't feel it was needed to mention maternity leave, but thanks for pointing it out! Mind you I did write this two or three years ago! Thanks for the feedback, it helps a lot!
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On Chapter 28 now, wow I'm flying through!
OK, Nick has just been drugged and tricked into marrying Katie who is a gold digging whore. Lance found out he's not the father and Amanda is left alone on New Years Eve with a crying baby.
Nice and easy to understand and I have an idea of how the characters look in my head. But sometimes things happen without the reader getting to know why. Could do with a bit of filler so that the reader can really get into what's happening. If that makes sense!
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I'm actually reading it for myself and I can see what you mean about filler. I think I didn't want to bore anyone by using too much in the story as I have two prequels to elaborate on Nick and Amanda's past...Nick's childhood etc. Thanks for pointing things out for me!
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I'll read m ore tonight. Hopefully finish. Off to work soon so I can't right now. Would much rather be home reading and working on Home.
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Up to Chapter 36 now. I would've liked to have read more about Brian and Amanda's relationship instead of one brief date and then two weeks later he's crying because she dumped him. I also think that the baby would take up more of her time and therefore should be included more, rather than always being with Brian. Babies take up a lot of time, believe me (and I'm glad mine are old enough that I don't have to constantly entertain them, lol).
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Since it's 3,000 degrees outside and i'm being a mole man, I was able to really spend some time reading today and have now read up to chapter 20 of October Road.
Alex and Krystle have now become a couple. I was glad it took up to chapter 17 for that to happen because we really got a chance to see her hesitancy about getting involved with him again after all these years. Now that I have some back story on Krystle, I don't find her as annoying as I did before. I am starting to see she's a very insecure person who maybe doesn't feel like she deserves happiness. She also tends to jump to conclusions and ends up constantly apologizing for it. Alex is very apologetic as well. In fact, I haven't gotten through a chapter yet where one of them doesn't apologize for something they have said or done a multitude of times.
Howie has also managed to make a little cameo as the Principal of the school that Krystle's son attends. Brian is the father. I am curious to see if Nick and Kevin make an appearance as well. It was important for me that the guys were in this so I was glad to see them show up.
Alex also confronts the girlfriend he left in this set of chapters which was nice because it slowly gets rid of all the baggage the two of them had previously so they can really just focus on each other.
I feel like i'm beginning to know them better.
It still is a bit slow paced and I figured out why for me anyway, it's just too much information in the dialogue. Little things that probably could be left to the reader's imagination is spelled out in the dialogue. I do the same too though. I am a dialogue junkie and sometimes it's hard to tell when to stop. When it becomes too much like just over hearing something important to eavesdropping on a very boring conversation. It's a fine line and the trick is balancing the two. So, I do find myself at times skimming through parts of the dialogue sections.
I am curious to see how this relationship evolves and what kind of drama unfolds along the way. I would imagine i'm in for some kind of drama since i'm only half way through. LOL
:)
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Since the story isn't about Brian I didn't think anyone would care to hear about Brian and Amanda's relationship. The story is about Nick...and I felt all the baby stuff would bore people to be honest.
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Since the story isn't about Brian I didn't think anyone would care to hear about Brian and Amanda's relationship. The story is about Nick...and I felt all the baby stuff would bore people to be honest.
Maybe, but it would've been nice to hear a little more.
I'm enjoying the story though, it's keeping my interest and making me want to see what happens next :)
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I am glad you like it so far. I wanted to point out that Brian was more upset about the fact that he and amanda had been friends as kids....grew up together. I think the rejection after all they'd been through hit him harder because of their history.
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Only a few chapters left, but I'll save them for tomorrow and then do my review.
Hope everyone else is getting on OK with their reading :)
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Unfortunately it's a challenge to read somewhere quietly with my girls being home all day. :plugears: My plan was to read at least two chapters a day...uh not working. *Sigh*
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Aww well, read when you all can. I'm happy to see most of you have at least read the first few chapters of your stories. Still waiting on 4 to start moving. Yes, i'm watching you! lol
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When do we have to have this done by, Teach? lol
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This one is tricky because of the various lengths of all the stories but I think by the end of August is fair. But by Monday everyone should have at least started reviewing and reading their stories, even if it's only one chapter. At least something.
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For the "would I read games if there were a sequel" yes actually I would be interested.
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Just finished Chapter 18 of 00Carter and the episode Ice, Ice, Baby. I liked how more of the characters and their backstorys were revealed, but this was not my favorite episode. It took place in Antartica and involved spying penguins which was funny, but I just found it sort of far fetched.The story is flowing better now and I am liking the bitter relationship between Brian and Nick. Something tells me that Nick's hatred for Brian is not personal, but he has personal issues with the US government which I cannot wait to find out about.
The one thing that I am struggling with is all the celeb cameos. It's not just BSB and Nsync. Now we are getting into other boyband members and the members of TATU. I mean that's just a nitpicky preferance thing, but I'd prefer more OC's. Outside of the female agents we really don't have any.
I did sneak a peek at the first chapter of the next episode and I think I'm going to like that MUCH better. I'm already super intrigued by it.
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Thanks for the feedback Mel!
One thing about the celeb cameos, they're more meant to mock, since Howie is the "forgotten" Backstreet Boy. We thought it'd be funny if he led a pack of forgotten boybanders as his minions. Which is why, when you see the members of FANS, they're all the members that weren't too popular. And why something had to happen to send Justin over there. But you're right, it's a perference thing. Sadly we have more original characters meant to come in, but we (still) in some ways, haven't gotten that far yet lol.
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Thanks, Mel! I'm glad you feel that the story is flowing better now. That's what we were hoping for. I know just in the times I've reread parts of it, I feel like Episodes 4 and onward are stronger than the first three in that sense. That said, they also get more "out there," so I know that might be a challenge for a reader like you who prefers realistic fiction.
Rose just went and added science fiction to the genre list for this story because it really does incorporate some sci-fi elements, with all the little gadgets and weapons, genetically-altered penguins, and what you've read about in Episode 5. In the spirit of spoofing James Bond and Austin Powers, it's definitely over the top and out there. Even though it has its serious moments, it's meant to a comedy/spoof, above anything else, and so it shouldn't be taken too seriously.
It's funny because when we are writing about real places and things that really exist, we are very diligent about researching and staying as true to life as possible, but for the sake of keeping it outlandish and entertaining, we take plenty of creative liberties and stretch reality to its limits, too. It's a nice challenge for me because I am a lot like you - I prefer realistic fiction, rather than sci-fi or fantasy, but this is the story where I get to be creative and use my imagination and sense of humor the most, and I love it for that.
I've also never been a big fan of crossovers, but we built our 00Carter universe around using celebrities in this alternate universe. FANS is made up of the "forgotten" members of boybands, who are not pop stars in this universe, but wannabes who couldn't make the cut of Himitsu Takana or real agencies like the FBI, CIA, or MI6. Most of the non-BSB celebrities are just in there for us to mock; we didn't want to fill the story with original characters that would take away from the fact that it's still supposed to be mainly a Backstreet Boys AU fanfic. I understand you not liking the celeb cameos, though; it's just a personal preference.
I hope you did end up liking Episode 5! That one isn't my favorite just because it takes quite a turn and is a lot different from the other episodes, but it has its moments. My favorite episode is probably Episode 6, so I'll be curious to hear your thoughts on that one. :)
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OK, up to Chapter 52 now.
A few things have come up which made me wonder. If Nick and Amanda were best friends in Florida when they were kids, how come her parents don't know him? How come they live in New Jersey? Did she just spend summers in Florida or something? How come no one seemed to know who Aaron was when he turned up, and Amanda didn't know Nick's mother. If they were best friends, surely they'd have met, been to each others houses, etc. I also find it odd that her parents haven't seen Celine yet, surely they would've come for a visit as she's their grand daughter.
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1) Name of the story you read and the author and what you feel the genre is. Your answer might be different then the authors.
You Give Love A Bad Name by DelphinaCarter . I think the genre should be Romance/AU/Drama
2) Would you have ever read this story if it wasn't a challenge?
I probably wouldn't because this is the third in the series, the series starts with Nick as a 10 year old I believe. I don't really care to read stories about the Backstreet Boys when they were little kids.
3) What was your favorite scene?
The romantic location and proposal at the end.
4) Who was your favorite character and why?
Probably Brian because he was there for Amanda through it all, and he seemed to be the only one looking after the baby, despite being a policeman who did double shifts.
5) Overall tell us one reason why you think someone else should/or shouldn't read this story.
If you want a nice easy read with a bit of drama and a happy ending then you might like it. If you like stories with more background story behind what's going on, more details and more realistic, then this won't be for you.
6) Did it convert you to the genre it is? Would you be willing to read another story just like it?
I already like AU/Romance/Drama, so yes I would read more stories in those genres.
7) Give one piece of concrit that might help the author for future reference. This can be positive too, concrit doesn't always mean negative.
I'm not being negative here, but the story started out with a lot of promise, but it didn't live up to what I wanted it to be. I would've liked more details rather than one event after another without much description. I also think it you are writing a baby into the story, you have to deal with the baby and not shove it off onto people. I know the character runs her own nightclub, but surely she isn't the only person there, doesn't she have a manager to help? I feel that it's not realistic for a new mother to work really long hours and dump her baby on friends, especially when the main person looking after the baby seems to be Brian, who also has a full time job as a policeman. I know it's fiction and you thought it would be boring to write about the baby, so why did she have the baby? Or why doesn't she have a childminder rather than various male friends who have no clue about babies. This story gives the impression that Nick and Amanda couldn't give a shit about their baby, and I hate parents like that. I'm not having a go, I just want to help you understand that from a mother's point of view, that seemed irresponsible of them. Maybe other people are fine with it. I'm sorry to go on about it, but I could rant all day when it comes to people having kids who shouldn't.
8) This should be the question the author asked in their survey. Everyone's will be different.
Tracy asked if the story flows well. I have to say that a lot of it does flow well, it's an easy and fun read most of the time.
9) Would you recommend this story and author to another person? Why or why not.
I would recommend Tracy to others as she has some good ideas, she just needs to expand them a bit more and think about what her characters are doing.
10) Out of 10 stars what would you give this story?
I'll give it 6.
11) Do you think after you are done reading what's there so far (and you only have to read however many chapters are there when the start of this challenge was given) Do you think you will continue to read the story through to the end to see what happens to the characters?
N/A because it's complete.
And for those of you reading completed stories, if there was a sequel, would you be curious enough to continue reading on?
They've got their happy ending, so what else is there?
Sorry for my honesty, and I hope you aren't offended Tracy.
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Wow Steph! You have finished both of your stories and meanwhile some of us have barely gotten started on our first. You rock!
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Wow Steph! You have finished both of your stories and meanwhile some of us have barely gotten started on our first. You rock!
When it's quiet in work I get a lot of reading done. Plus I've not done much this weekend due to the crappy British weather.
I'd happily read more :)
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^ Well feel free to read the rest of your picks or any of the other ones on the list. :)
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I'll take a look and see what else is there that I haven't already read.
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There is actually a sequel to the story....Still The One. I would also like to point out that this story was my first one...I wrote it 3 years ago.
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As for By My Side, Nick is not ten during the whole story, I appreciate that you read mine and the feedback.
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Stories about Nick as a child obviously appeal to some people, just not me. We all like different types of stories, and AC is a great place for showing the diversity in writing. If we all liked the same thing, it would be boring.
I hope you aren't offended by my comments. My comments were meant to be helpful.
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I just finished reading my story, so here's my survey!
1) Name of the story you read and the author and what you feel the genre is. Your answer might be different then the authors.
I read "My Answer Is You" by Rachel (colorguard_div a). I agree with the genres she gave it - drama and romance.
2) Would you have ever read this story if it wasn't a challenge?
Probably not. I am a Brian girl, so it might have caught my eye, but after reading the summary, I doubt I would have even clicked on it. The premise isn't one that I would find interesting; I just don't get easily sucked into romances that are all about interpersonal drama. I usually need something more than that, some outside drama or life-or-death situation, to suck me into a story.
3) What was your favorite scene?
My favorite scene was probably Chapter 15, when Nick comes back to his hotel room to find Brian and Josie in bed together, after specifically telling them "No hanky panky in my bed." There was a lot of comedy in that chapter; Nick was funny.
4) Who was your favorite character and why?
My favorite character was Nick because he was the unlikely voice of reason. He had a good relationship with both of the main characters and gave them better advice than anyone else. He helped stop all the drama and shenanigans. He provided some comic relief, too.
5) Overall tell us one reason why you think someone else should/or shouldn't read this story.
If you genuinely love romance as a study of the interpersonal relationship between two people, read this story. It's well-written and short and simple enough that it would make for a nice, rainy day read. The two main characters are flawed in a way that makes their relationship quite dysfunctional at times, so readers who enjoy that kind of drama would probably find them interesting to read about.
If you're like me and prefer event-driven stories to character-driven ones, it's probably not the story for you. It's definitely character-driven, and while there is plenty of drama in the story, it's just not the kind of drama I find interesting.
6) Did it convert you to the genre it is? Would you be willing to read another story just like it?
No, it didn't convert me to romance any more than I already was. I do read some romance, but usually only when it is more of a subplot or has more event-driven, dramatic or suspenseful subplots to keep it interesting for me. I have read other stories like this, and I'm not likely to read more for my own enjoyment unless the premise, writing style, or characters were just so engaging that they sucked me in from the beginning. I can only think of one romance that has truly done that to me, and that is "Cover Me With Dreams" - which still, I should add, took me two tries to get into LOL. I am just not a big fan of that kind of romance.
7) Give one piece of concrit that might help the author for future reference. This can be positive too, concrit doesn't always mean negative.
Except for a few typos and mixing up your/you're on occasion, this story was well-written. It made for a quick, easy read because it was just detailed enough without being too wordy. The only constructive criticism I can give is about point of view, which we've already discussed here. I found the point of view awkward at times, when it switched from Josie's first person narration to Brian's third person perspective within the same scene. I think it would have been smoother and less awkward to tell the story totally in third person omniscient point of view, so that the reader could still have insight into any of the characters' thoughts without one of them actually telling parts of the story.
8) Rachel's question: Did you find the female lead to be multi-dimensional enough that she appeared realistic?
Yes. I wasn't sure at first, but as the story progressed, I do feel I got to know and understand Josie as a person. She wasn't a Mary Sue; she was far from perfect, and little story time was given to describing her physical appearance and that kind of thing. I couldn't always relate to her, but I think it's just because her personality is completely different from mine. She came across as a drama queen and an avoider, the kind of person who blows little things out of proportion and then runs off in a huff instead of stopping to think things through and resolve the problem. I know people who are just like that, so even though her over-the-top reactions frustrated me, they weren't unrealistic. I also believed in her relationship with her son, which was a big part of the story.
9) Would you recommend this story and author to another person? Why or why not?
I would definitely recommend "My Answer Is You" to any romance fan. I have to admit that I haven't read any other of Rachel's stories, but from reading this one, I think she's a great writer and would recommend her writing to anyone. I would be interested to read a story by her in a different genre.
10) Out of 10 stars what would you give this story?
I'd give it an 8. It was a good story, even if it wasn't really my cup of tea.
11) Do you think after you are done reading what's there so far (and you only have to read however many chapters are there when the start of this challenge was given) Do you think you will continue to read the story through to the end to see what happens to the characters?
N/A, since the story is finished.
12) And for those of you reading completed stories, if there was a sequel, would you be curious enough to continue reading on?
In all honesty, probably not. The characters got their happy ending at the end of this story, so I feel like a sequel would either be all fluff about their family or manufactured drama for the sake of creating conflict, neither of which would really interest me. I think Rachel picked the perfect place to end the story.
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I am not offended by the comments...I just have to get better at writing, that was my first story and not my best work.
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I am not offended by the comments...I just have to get better at writing, that was my first story and not my best work.
Maybe it was the wrong story to submit for this challenge. I mean if you knew it wasn't your best, your first fic, etc., you probably should've submitted something more recent, knowing you were signing up to receive constructive criticism. That way you could see how your current writing stood up.
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1) Name of the story you read and the author and what you feel the genre is. Your answer might be different then the authors.
Ice Cold Blood by The Distant Heart, Supernatural
2) Would you have ever read this story if it wasn't a challenge?
No.
3) What was your favorite scene?
Honestly I didn't have one. I had trouble following the story.
4) Who was your favorite character and why?
Brian, he's the hero
5) Overall tell us one reason why you think someone else should/or shouldn't read this story.
The story can be hard to follow therefor it might not be for everyone.
6) Did it convert you to the genre it is? Would you be willing to read another story just like it?
No. I'm not a supernatural type and I don't like vampires stories. It didn't make me want to read another one.
7) Give one piece of concrit that might help the author for future reference. This can be positive too, concrit doesn't always mean negative.
Develop the story more. There was too much detail on little things, for example when Nick was getting the blood for them to drink.
8) Author's question: Is there any awkward English and does it hold your interest? Does it flow well?
The English wasn't awkward but I did notice a lot of repeating information said different ways. Honestly no it didn't hold my interest. I don't think it flowed well. Some parts did but it jumped POV too much.
9) Would you recommend this story and author to another person? Why or why not
If you like vampire/supernatural then give it a read. If you don't, I don't think it'll make you a fan.
10) Out of 10 stars what would you give this story?
I'd have to say 4.
11) Do you think after you are done reading what's there so far (and you only have to read however many chapters are there when the start of this challenge was given) Do you think you will continue to read the story through to the end to see what happens to the characters?
No I wouldn't.
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The only other story I could have put up would have been Figured You Out. I didn't put it up because most people here had read it. FYO was my best work (not to sound concieted). It made me see how my writing has improved since then.
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I am going to start a brand new thread for this challenge since we're already on page 16! :)